Is it weird that I'm attracted to older men?

Like 10/15 years older? I literally don't really find anyone my age attractive. The only time I've had a sexual attraction to someone was when they are older. I'm 21.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, first off, guys your age haven't, by and large, figured out who they are or what they want. So it could easily be as simple as you being attached to men that are confident, established, and know what (and who) they want to pursue. That's not uncommon at all in women.

    It could also mean that you're more attracted to protector/provider types and older men tend to have more means to provide and more experience on how to protect (especially emotionally). This isn't uncommon in women either. So no, it's not that odd.

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  • That is how biology works.
    Females subconsient is set to feel attractive to men that can protect and are stable to maintain a family.

    Now if you add to that girls usually mature faster than guys, that means you might be 21 but your mental maturity might be years beyond that.

    To put it into perspective, you might have started having feelings of wanting a family and kids already while your 21 crush is having fantasies about having threesomes and doing sctacy at clubs, but your single 30 y'ol neighbore is doing everything you wish your man should do.

    BUT there is a HUGE problem in this equaliton. I know first hand because my parents are 10 years apart.
    When your guy starts hitting 45 your magical life will be over unless he is welthy. He will become fat or unattractive, he will have erection problems while you at your 35s would still be craving sex a few days a week. You will want to go places and hangout but he will just not have the energy for it. And if you have children at an old age, when they hit their teens your man will be too tired already for all the sports and activities a dad-son could do.
    That is not how always goes, but is one problem that is very real and happens very often, so beware and choose wisely.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I would not say it is weird, its perfectly normal especially for young women who are emotionally and mentally more mature. this is most common under those who had to grow up sooner. I mean it is weird for me to be dating a guy that is 23.

    I do urge you to proceed with caution, especially because you too. like. myself is very young. remember that your life is still starting, there is much of life you. still need to learn and experience that an older man would have already, this essentially means that you do not grow together and more often. than not they "raise" the young woman into adulthood.

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  • If it helps, I’m 20 and currently have a crush on someone 15 years older than I am. I do get what you’re saying though. I don’t find any guy my age or around my age attractive enough as to pursue a relationship with them. Those guys I friendzone really hard.

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What Guys Said 126

  • It isn't that odd but at 21 you lack experience and with that it is hard not to have power structures within a relationship that can be harmful. The only reason I would be attracted to someone 21 is because of my own insecurities. Obviously sexual attraction would be completely normal, but to actually consider a relationship would take a lot of consideration.

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  • No. Thats what nature intended. Older men on average have more resources which is what women ultimately seek in a partner.

    Men want young beautiful healthy feminine and fertile women to build with a family with.

    Its always been like that.

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  • Not that law should dictate who we find attractive, but merely at a legal level, if you're both over age 21, anything is fair game. The rest is merely context because business contexts typically (but not always) dislike co-workers and subordinates having relationships. That aside, our society tends to make relationships where ladies and guys are within 5 to 10 years of each other.

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  • I'm much more attracted to younger women but I may be immature mentally. While not deeply desiring to have children, it itd be nice if that was an option. People should consider adoption more though. People adopt pets and love them deeply. If a woman of any age was thinking, had attractive face, and we really clicked, I'd definitely consider them. But young women waste time they are most beautiful looking for perfect man and letting their ego be out of control.

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  • My girlfriend is 21, and the average age of girls I have dated throughout my entire life is 23. Perhaps the majority of girls like boys about their age, but some young women are more mature and seek out mature, experienced, and financially capable men.

    Whatever works for you. Don't let anyone tell you any different.

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  • I'm attracted to older women.

    I mean I still am attracted to girls my age, or younger, don't get me wrong... but the thought of mature women... There is a reason they are called MILFS

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  • It's not uncommon (for young girls/women to be attracted to older men), if that's what you're referring to. In fact, it's not uncommon for younger adults in general to be attracted to older adults. Though, typically people prefer or tend to date someone closer to their own age.

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  • No it is not weird. Perfectly normal. But make sure you are careful and get to know the person and that they are std and sti free before getting intimate. Us older guys have a knack for carrying sti s and stds.

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  • There is nothing weird about it. Often at young age we find strong attraction towards opposite sex on account of their maturity, prowess, and the way they sometimes understand us and deal with us. A short term association might be symbiotic to both but a long term relationship needs to be addressed after going through all pros and cons.

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  • All through history of man, age difference was never a problem. Genesis 25 Abraham married Keturah after Sarah died. She was young enough to bring him 6 more sons. He was 115. Look at President Harding, was in his 70s in office and married 2nd wife 25 years old. Look at Willie Nelson, celebrating over 30+ years marriage, he was 56, she was 26.

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  • It is not weird and there's nothing wrong with that it's just your affinity, even some men get more attracted by older ladies instead of ladies of their age or younger. More to that, the more men get old the more they're handsome, so it's not strange.

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  • I think it's pretty normal. No worries there. As long as the maturity level isn't out of whack then it's fine.

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  • Yes, we're shit.

    (not talking on behalf of all the other older men here, before they get their panties in a bunch).

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  • 10 to 15 years is still not so bad compared to like people in their early 20's dating people who are already in their 60's because it just looks like they're gold diggers even if they're not.

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  • Everything that's uncommon sounds weird. So yes it's weird but not unacceptable. Even I'm attracted to elder woman more though the range would be upto 8-10 years, which I believe would differ depending upon your age as well as your likings.

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  • Not weird. I am only attracted to much younger women, like 20 years or more younger. I have never met a woman my age that I am attracted to. I wish I did because we would have more in common but it just never happens.

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  • Well it probably says you value maturity and maybe didn't have a positive male in your life growejng up and are alwsys looking for that missing piece?

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  • You like mature man. That's all.

    Just like some older people prefer lot young people because of youthfulness/more innocent or whatever it may be. Every body is different. Definitely not weird.

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  • No not at all. I think most younger women think an older guy will treat them as they should be treated - like a woman and not like a fuck toy younger men and boys treat you.

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What Girls Said 54

  • no its not weird some men older than you are more mature... well sometimes even older guys can be immature too... and you probably like older guys to cause physically their body changes looks more manly and stronger that pre-adults men

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  • No. It's not weird. Men in their 30's are more experienced on how to treat a woman and are more ready to commit. They have also grown out of the young boyish body by then.

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  • I don't go out with boys my age because of all the weird questions asked on GAG.
    To be a good example of why.
    Older men are set up usually in Bussniess and you become a moving part of there life as they become part of yours.

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  • nope. i have a fantasy of having sex with a man who's between 35-45 and i'm 20.
    not sure i'm necessarily attracted sexually, but i'd always like to try. i don't think you're weird.

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  • Not weird. I personally passionately love it. When the man is double in age, he can dominate me as he desires__ Which I prefer in a perfect man.

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  • Not weird at all, majority of my relationships or men I dated have beeen 10-15 years older. It’s about maturity and age really doesn’t have anything to do with it.

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  • Nope, not weird. People have their preferences. As long as you aren't underage, which you aren't thankfully, I don't see what is the big deal. People usually associate wide age gaps with sugar daddies so there is some stigma around that.

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  • No, you just get along with people in that age group. I get along with people older than me too for some reason. I had this friend who was like 40 years old and me and her were like best friends. It sounds crazy but its true lol

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  • It's not weird, you like who like. Just make sure that they're not interested in you just because you're younger and that they're not using you.

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    • *you like who you like

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    • Also 14 is not pedophilia
      Pedophilia is pre puberty

    • @TripleAce You started talking about something that has nothing to do with what I said.
      Where is that hatred towards me come from? You're acting as if I attacked you.

  • It's Okay for now at your age but if you do settle down with a much older man the age difference between you two will be more prominent as the years go by.

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  • No ) : older men are really attractive... like 35 and up up up

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    • @Bricks180 l understand

    • okay sorry

  • I don't think it's a good idea, since you guys are at completely two different places (regarding age), but... I wouldn't say it's weird.

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  • My ex was 15 years my senior, and it was the best relationship I ever had... I totally get it.

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  • It's not weird. I once dared a guy 10 years older than me. You go for who ever makes you happy. Screw everyone else's thought on it. It's your life!

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  • Of course not i couldn't wait till i was 18 so i didn't have to lie about my age lol i love older men like 33 and up

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  • i think a lot of us are attracted to older men because of their maturity and their confidence in themselves is very appealing

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    • Message me pls you are so beautiful

    • But what about overly-mature young men? Many of which are forced to mature at such a young age because of the idea that men must endure all troubles and "women must be helped and supported". This is not meant in a sexist way on my behalf, but considering our current reality, this puts us at a weird dissadvantage.

  • Me too. The stereotype is you must have daddy issues but I had a stable father figure throughout my life. I just have never been able to have stimulating conversations with guys my age. Every conversation involves an assortment of unwarranted innuendo and just general awkwardness on their part. i also matured very quickly (physically and mentally) which meant growing up I never liked guys my age because they were all tiny and seemed like babies to me. They were also repulsed by my gargantuan size so I just naturally liked older guys my whole life. I am a little different in that I can be attracted to guys my age, they just have to look mature. My attraction depends mostly on their personality anyway. There are some rare young guys who are mature. Summary: No! You are not weird at all, it is just a preference.

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  • No. Older men tend to be more stable than 21 year old. You probably find comfort in the stability older men offer.

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  • I don't think it's weird at all. I personally like older guys as well. I'm mainly attracted to guys who are in their late 20's - mid 30's.

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  • Absolutely not i see nothing wrong besides they are much more mature

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