My christian boyfriend insists me to eat pork and I am a muslim girl?

[Anonymous]

Although i am a muslim girl i live in a secular country so it is freedom here to choose one's religion. We are free to follow or not to folloe our religion here. I dont wear hijab and sometimes i drink alcohol. However i am not comfortable with the idea of eating pork.
My boyfriend is christian and he is from another country.
We have been dating since 3 years.
I told him several times about this point but still from time to time he expects me to eat pork.
Why does he act this way?
In the first year of our relationship, i remember that he would not even eat pork before the time we meet only to kiss me ( i didn't even ask that but he was that much sensitive once.)

[abc3643]

Eat pork. There's nothing wrong with it.

Eating pork was not halal or kosher centuries ago for the simple reason that, if you ate pork, you could die. So, the religious leaders not wanting their adherents to die made the rule "Thou shalt not eat swine!"

However, meanwhile, in the Third Millennium, we have this thing called science. We discovered why eating pork can be bad. If a pig is infected with the trichanella roundworm and they people eat the pig if it was undercooked, they can get trichonisis and can get sick or die.

So, you don't want to die in today's world? Don't eat infected pigs (you won't have to worry about that) and always cook your pork to a sufficient temperature. You'll be fine. Look at all the Christians doing it and nobody dies of trichonosis anymore.

www.merckmanuals.com/.../trichinosis

So, why did the ancient religious leaders ban eating pork? They didn't know WHY eating pork could be bad - just that it could be - and they didn't want their people getting sick. We know better now - that's what science is all about.

So, go ahead and have a ham steak or pork chops or bacon... mmmmmm... bacon. And enjoy the one life God gave you.

[TripleAce]

Well its just pork... billions of people eat it... there is nothing bad with it
think about it, you don't eat pork but the people right next to you in your country do -- its just a matter of which religion your parents forced down your throats growing up lol

but believe, everything is just molecules and atoms... its all the same!
every watch the Martian with Matt Damon... when he grows potatoes with humans poop...
everything has a purpose... something islam doesn't really teach instead it dictates your life with an iron fist

[Asker]

I know many people eat it.
The thing is that living and choosing my options are all up to me. I wear whatever i want. I wear mini skirts, sometimes i make my hair curly, sometimes i tie it. If i want, i go with my friends out and drink some beer. I m not arranging my life on the religious basis, as i say.. Just i am not comfortable with pork. I dont know if it comes from religion or not, maybe just personal preference..

[TripleAce]

It definitely comes from being conditioned. there's no other reason really

But if you aren’t comfortable then its also not a big deal if you dont like pork. He should let it go i think
I mean i dont like most seafood. Doest matter if my gf’s family makes seafood all the time. I wouldn't it lol

[Anonymous]

He's not being respectful of your beliefs. Tell him straight up that you're not okay with eating pork, and that he shouldn't expect you to go against your beliefs.

[Asker]

You are right..

[RedRobin]

Talk to him about it and tell him you feel like he's pressuring you into doing something you're not comfortable with

[tonicandgin]

he thinks he can subtly convert u. tell him to knock it off, it's disrespectful

[TripleAce]

a bit extreme much lol
eating pork doesn't mean he's trying to convert her...

[tonicandgin]

He keeps doing it. He's conditioning the pressure.

[Asker]

@TripleAce he doesn't try to convert me.. But in his traditional cuisine there is a big variety of pork meals.. He expects me to adapt in.. But in the beginning he already knew that i was muslim..

[TripleAce]

ya but not a strict muslim so he's not doing anything
eating pork doesn't make you a non muslim... thats just one thing
converting her would be to tell her to leave islam and come to christianity, which he isn't doing

[tonicandgin]

Baby steps dude. That's how manipulation works

[TripleAce]

Ya I understand, just because you eat pork doesn't mean you are not muslim...
just like people who drink and smoke are still muslim... just like people who don't do Ramadan are still muslim... or if you don't pray 5 times a day you are still muslim

same idea... so he's just saying, If you are willing to compromise in others parts, maybe this one too because its just food, its not like poison lol
but if you dont want to then you dont want to I guess

[TripleAce]

@tonicandgin ya this isn't dawah... other religions don't get rewards from god to convert people ya... thats only islam
I highly doubt he cares

[Asker]

@TripleAce he is not converting me, sure.
Eating pork won't make me a non muslim, i m aware.
Just he asks me to change my habit of which i m not comfortable

[tonicandgin]

@TripeAce see! She said she's NOT comfortable with him being pushy. Compromises have a line

[TripleAce]

@tonicandgin
ok but calm down lol... ok she's not comfortable but thats not the end of the world either. its just a matter of being use to something or not. He's not asking her to go do drugs or party and do something that will damage her, its food! ... good food... good for her to eat for sure
there is a lot of things couples do that make the other feel uncomfortable but if its reasonable and doesn't hurt the person its ok to be a little open minded

[TripleAce]

@Asker
so why are you not comfortable... whats the reason? just because its not something you have been doing so it feels weird

[tonicandgin]

@TripleAce being chill just made me a pushover... i know early signs of manipulation intentional or not now. The one thing i will not 'chill' on is having to repeat how many times i have to say "no"

[TripleAce]

@tonicandgin
sure maybe you were too chill lol... but both are extremes... being too chill before and being too resistance now... both are not middle ground balanced positions

manipulation, I highly doubt that. He's being straight forward by saying 'It would nice if you could eat pork and enjoy the food we cook for everyone at home'

but I get it, if she really really really doesn't want to... then its fine

[tonicandgin]

I'm not being too resistant. I know a broken record technique when it is being used. They keep doing it until u just give up all together. It's a form of coercion. Best to address it early.

[TripleAce]

Sure but there is variation of magnitude of the situation
Food is food, there's many worse things out there
Like her drinking alcohol lol

The same could be said that she was conditioned to be this way. Its not nAtural and certainly not from god since the message is different for everyone

Its just a matter of condionining. It won't kill her lol dont worry

[Hurdleez-Swampede]

If he is Christian and you are Muslim, then why stay in an unequally yoked relationship?

He should not eat pork either. Pork has known parasites in them and are never cured, no matter how long they are cooked or what temperature it is heated at.

[Asker]

I really do love him. Just i wouldn't want to interfere with his eating habits and culture. It is the way he was brought up, it doesn't matter for my part really. But when he expects me to change my habits, it is kind of heart breaking.

[cth96190]

The Quran says that you cannot be with a male who is not a Muslim.
The penalty is death by honour killing, to be carried out by your father, brothers, or male cousins.
I suggest that you spend more time reading the Quran.

[Asker]

It is none of your business mr. super muslim guy.

[cth96190]

@Asker
I am not a Muslim. I am a kafir at the extreme end of the anti-Muslim scale, because as a soldier, a journalist and as a student of history I have seen Islam in action.
I have also read the Quran and some Hadith, for the purpose of knowing my enemy.
I merely pointed out that you were going to get yourself killed, doing what you were doing.
It appears that you will have to learn the hard way.

[Anonymous]

If you don´t want to eat pork, then just don´t. However, you should work on becoming more secularized. Your boyfriend probably regards you not eatingf pork as a remnant of being a muslim, and apparently he is not okay with that.

[ImpressiveUsername]

He needs to respect your beliefs, and if he can't do that- fuck him. If he doesn't treat you with respect he doesn't deserve you.

[Secretgardenblood]

Do you live in Turkey? And you use alcohol but you know alcohol haram than pork but you are use it. If you have problem about this you can date a Muslim guy

[MackToday]

Seems like he wants you out of Islam. I can't blame him but it doesn't seem very practical.

[Anonymous]

When you do not have a resolve around avoiding alcohol, naturally he does not jave a reason to take your rules seriously.

[Kelly6]

Dated 3 year and started fighting now?

[Asker]

Hehehehehe

[Anonymous]

I thought you have to date a Muslim guy?

[Asker]

I don't have to. :) it is my life :)

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, cos I’m Christian also, and want to date a Muslim girl, but that is what she told me

[OceanVibess]

Becouse he is a jerk and it is time to change him

[Anonymous]

Where is he from? And where are you from