Why do women expect so much out of men? (Page 2)
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Because biologically speaking men are the initiators, the providers, the leaders. This isn’t a new concept, men have lead in relationships throughout history. Taking the male role, a person makes a decision and the partner adapts the submissive role to follow. Why is that so challenging? Again it’s even a part of each genders hormones.
Yeah, I can understand that logic but women are rejecting that submissive role in modern times but they still expect us to adhere to ours. Whats up with that?
Women are stepping up and choosing to take on masculine roles and energies throughout the day, which is great! Women are producing more in the workplace, taking more responsibility in their community, and taking ownership of their own happiness.
This doesn’t mean that all women want those roles and even the majority of women taking on that energy still prefer the feminine in other parts of their day. That’s why communication is key in relationships. Two people should be able to sit down and figure out simple things like daily chores in the house, who is in charge of the finances, and who wants to pick dinner on a Friday night. As long as those expectations are set, it’s all smooth. When they don’t communicate and assumptions are made, then you see issues.
Be sure not to listen to the small minority of people trying to devalue men and virtues of the alpha male. Most women want a strong man who will lead in the absence of leadership and will take care of them. The majority of women don’t want to give up the feminine roles they play daily and how they bring 50% of the energy in relationships to support their men. Just ignore that small minority and keep on being the best man you can.
Thank you that is helpful but i feel like women have more options than men when it comes to initial dating. These modern beliefs have seemed to take away mens options even more. I can't help but feel like the deck is stacked against us today when it comes to initial dating. But i do thing the answer you gave is the right way to do it when in the relationship. Still our odds of finding common ground with new girls is shrinking. That's why we are dating less successfully.
Thanks for agreeing with some of my comments. I would answer your questions about the initial stages of dating by saying that men have trended in recent years to be more ‘soft’. I know from personal experience when I was younger I heard all the stories of women being raped and abused both physically and emotionally by angry men so I decided after being a teenager I was going to stand out as the ‘nice guy/white Knight’. Not a good strategy and I believe men are doing that more and more.
The reason why it’s not working is they are denying their biology and natural hormones and instead acting in a fake way. Guess what, one thing women do better than men is they can smell bullshit a mile away. The fact that me and so many young men chose to act smaller, more timid, and gentler to try and avoid giving off the impression we would harm women becomes self fulfilling, we can’t harm them when they aren’t attracted to us in the first place.
I had to grow up and realize the truths that honesty, masculinity, and emotional strength are really what women want. They don’t want a boy who is afraid to approach them, they want a man who walks right up to them and starts a genuine conversation. Because women want a man to provide for them, how could she ever trust him with her life if he doesn’t have the balls to approach a stranger and risk temporary rejection? From your original question men get the privilege of showing women from the start that they have a plan and are willing to take risks, make decisions, and lead her into a relationship. And with more and more men trending in the wrong direction, those guys who say fuck it, I’m just going to say what I want and stop bullshitting; those men are going to be prized and fought over by women of today.
Because it seems that in general, guys are less interested in relationships than women.
So if a woman was to approach a man, she runs a higher risk of getting turned down or having him string her along or only use her for sex.
If guys weren't known for disliking commitment, women might put themselves out there more.
That couldn’t be further from the truth, most guys I know are searching for a relationship the funny thing is women always seem to go for the emotionally unavailable men instead, that’s why I learned if I want to find a relationship I have to act like all I want is sex... it worked I met my ex girlfriend doing that, also men have a much higher risk of rejection than women, out of 10 women asked out maybe 1 will actually let you take her for coffee
I do believe you. Yes men have it harder. Maybe it is because you guys let it. I think if it was the opposite, you guys would do same to women. I know it is not fair. Maybe it is because of the biology and the nature of women. I dont know. In my culture the women are really judgy and careful when it comes to a marriage in order to find the perfect mate. The thing is we have to do that because you only have one chance. If the first marriage fails, you are a loser and as a woman it is so fucking to difficult to marry again in my culture. So it is the fear maybe. But i dont know why it is like that in us.
Because men throw themselves at women. Even an mildly unattractive woman will usually have several suiters. When you have options, you can afford high standards.
Good news is, this works both ways. Since women are almost exclusively attracted to the top 20% of men, once you get there, you will have no shortage of women.
And its not even difficult to get there. Just go to the gym for a couple years, eat well, sleep well, and pay attention to grooming/mens style. Most men don't, which is why 80% are unattractive to women.
Seems you tried all the usual, normal things and nothing worked for you. Bro, women are also people, not all are alike. Even when you do things right people might take it for granted and not appreciate it. So although one may put in the best effort its hard not to expect something in return, right? well you may have to let go of your expectations from now on I guess. Try that and let us know.
Because they can. Dude if women were coming up to you in droves and you had endless options would you bother approaching? Of course not.
It sucks but you make the best out of an unfavourable position by meeting lots of girls, getting good at attracting them and become one of the top guys that girls choose because they see you as a cut above the rest.
Your fundamental issue is you’re seeing dating as unfair or uneven due to the amount of “work”.
Think of it like this; if you want something, put in max effort to get it! Stop bitching about “fairness” and be the best version of yourself... and get what you want.
Honestly lots of women your age have this idea that they should be treated like royalty while the man in the situation is being treated like a peasant. There is no more two way street with this, it's all give and no return. It makes me sad and makes me understand why our birth rates are plummeting...
If you take a look at relationships in general, the mans happiness is never taken into account, it's always like this, the only time a relationship is in trouble is when the girl is unhappy. If a man is unhappy In a relationship it's the mans fault, if a woman is unhappy in a relationship it's the mans fault... it's sad but true..
Yes, I see the same thing generally. No in all spicific relationships though. I'm just wondering how much it will take for them to understand where we are coming from. I fear they never will.
As long as feminism and leftists are pitting the genders against each other and creating the divide it will always be like this.
You'll have the chick flicks to thank for that. Twilight, 50 Shades of Grey, they all influenced the young girls like that.
You really think it's just because of girls romanticizeing of dating? I mean guys romanticize it to but typically get over it at a young age. How long does it take for women to lower their expectations?
Could say the same about bollywood movies for guys
They sure don't make it easy on us do they?
Oh, and you missed the most important part of all this, before you even get to any of that-- #1: You have to be tall (something that isn't controllable). Otherwise the rest of this stuff doesn't even happen.
I think women feel entitled to more due to the whole feminist movement (in my opinion)
Could ask the same thing... why do guys expect a more attractive partner then them, expect to be entitled to sex or at least kisses and touches, and generally expect a woman to look fucking perfect after a bad day
Umm i don’t any guys in the history of humanity ever felt entitled to sex, we just hope that the person we love wants us
@chris_987 you're a guy of course you won't know any that dont feel entitled to sex
Same goes for your a girls so you wouldn’t know why guys feel girls expect so much from us, you see it works both ways
@chris_987 that was my point
You're definitely with some twisted and complicated girls. If a girl likes you, she likes you. No need to be all out just don't be desperate and ask them if they want to go out. Yeah u gotta deal with rejection but it happens to everyone.
Those girls who don't appreciate you aren't gonna end up with u no matter what you do.
Nice advice
Yeah, and all that stuff can be a full time job, if you’re not naturally good at those things, which I am not.
At the rate I’m going, I’m going to be always working. At this rate, if I ever become attractive, I’ll have very little time for dating because the upkeep will be so insane. That won’t allow much time for me to be me and relax.
I’d say a few things: how they’re brought up, societal expectations from friends/social media/family, unrealistic viewpoints and full blown entitlement that can be addressed lol. If they’re close to their parents (especially father), she may expect the same type of bond from a partner. Social media and other people may influence her opinion. Unrealistic expectations from things like novels and romantic comedies in the media too. I’m blabbing but that’s my perspective.
That is why I don't currently have a girlfriend. Not saying that I want to but it seems like I am putting so much effort to the table for a vagina. Sure a vagina can please me for a while but what about their personality and such? Nope they refuse to show any of it until I put more effort into them.
Literally the best question I've seen on this site. They expect you to have loads of money, then you need to drive a fancy car, then you need to be 6'3. They expect so much out of guys when a lot of them having nothing going for themselves. That's why at the end of the day, it's probably best I stick to one night stands. I dont meet their relationship standards but I am sexually appealing so at least they'll fuck me when horny 😂
That's bs. My current man was unemployed when we met and got together and he drove a $1,000 used car. Most of us don't expect anymore than what you expect from us. What we expect is that you will actually want to take the time to get to know us and not just looking to f'ck us and move on.
Can you honestly say that you are attracted to an easy woman and would be in it for the long term?
@PinkMichae I hate most women, how about that?
Sounds like something you need to work out if you plan to enjoy everything life has to offer. And why? Did you get your heart broken like everybody has? Hate only hurts you.
Dating is hard but not impossible. It's actually been made easier with the advent of dating apps. Doesn't mean it's enjoyable or easy but its definitely a lot easier.
Just create a message like "Hi my name is (insert name)" then copy and paste message and send it to 100+ women. You'll get responses, I guarantee it.
Usually in the beginning it's about seeing whether a guy can be independent or not but we don't act all dependent on you later on once the relationship gets serious. We too have our own struggles and challenges when it comes to dating too
Wow! At 16 years old you already get it. You're obviously more perceptive than some adults.😎
You're thinking too much about it.
Now this isn't going to sit well with others but the trick is not to care that much. What I mean is its not up to you to impress her its up to her to be impressed by you and that can only happen if you're not trying to put a facade on.
Women dont want yes men, ever disagreed with something someone said on a first date and told them? (Disagree not argue) It shows conviction, honesty and most of all a backbone.