Do men expect too much from women nowadays?

Question

TheRealPepperPotts · Accepted Answer

I don't know that it's gender-specific. I think people in general expect too much. Let me explain:

I know that many people think that society has lowered the bar too much and there aren't high enough standards. There's some truth to that, but I have a theory about it and I've observed it enough times that I think it has merit. Give me a second to build my case...

Our Western society is an extremely production and performance based society. There are a number of contributing factors to this that I won't bother with getting into, since I think it's fairly obvious that this is the case.

As we have become more and more advanced, we are able to add more and more to our lives. We can do more, accomplish more, and be more than we ever could in previous generations. It's a competition to see who has the best Cinderella story, the best comeback, the best personal testimony (Christian), the greatest accomplishments, the most sales, and on and on. To work 60, 70, 80 hours a week is applauded and admired, almost a humble-brag kind of thing.

However...

Some people aren't type A personalities. Some people care about relationships. Some people like to move slowly and observe, and think, and ponder. But our society doesn't allow people to operate that way. So, these people try. And fail, because they aren't wired the same way as people who are geared for the race. If this impossible and unsustainable contest continues, these people don't just slow down to a pace they can manage. They get kicked out, or quit.

This is extremely shameful for them, and because our society thinks feelings don't matter (at least, not in the big leagues), they have no idea how to cope with the feelings of frustration, shame, anger and fear. So, they tune out. They game, they drink, they do drugs... anything to numb those feelings and escape from a reality that is not kind to the dreamers, the tenderhearted, and the idealists.

Then, we point fingers and say, "Ewww, look at them! What has society come to? How pathetic that the bar has dropped so low..." and then we hop right back into the race, where the bar was never attainable to begin with.

This theory informs my perspective here. Because of that, I think most people expect too much. We expect perfect children, service people who don't have a personal life or feelings, partners who are always in sync with us, and friends who always show up at the right time. But that has never been reality; we just bought the idea that it could be. And then, we are indignant when people are human.

I could go on, but I think that covers the gist of it. :D

Ms_Facesitter · Accepted Answer

I don't think they do. The feminism, cheaters, man haters, gold diggers get the spot light in social media because we as people unfortunately love drama, but because of this men are believing that they're representing all of us. So when you're nice and caring towards them they're like "Women like this exist?"

And people looking at you two from the outside think "She's probably after his money" or something like that, it's honestly just sad.

Summeroflove · Answer

It depends on the man really. A lot of one sided relationships I see are where women are treated like queens but they refuse to treat their man like a king.

There are narcissistic women who just everything is about them. They want the benefits of feminism while at the same time the benefits of traditionalism, just except for all the things they don’t want to do. It’s like the man does all of this and gets little to none in return. Those type of women are so unattractive. They wonder why all they pull is simps. Well who else will put up with all of that? Seriously.

I see women in shitty relationships as well though. Every relationship is different and what’s right for someone maybe isn’t for someone else. Any real relationship is give and take.

As far as women in general the average woman doesn't owe me anything just like I don’t owe the average woman anything either. As far as dating goes people are entitled to their own standard, that doesn’t mean they’re entitled for someone to meet those standards.

If someone is wanting someone to do something. Okay maybe it’s not the right relationship for YOU…. But who cares. It’s him/her.

There are some men and women who do for some odd reason think the opposite sex owes them something. They tend to become very bitter with the opposite sex because of how they were born despite the fact they never did anything to them.

DishLady · Answer

I think everyone expects too much from everyone else. Each o dis should just manage our own desires and not push and project expectations on others.

alice55 · Answer

Compared to the 50s yes definitely but is not such a man issue but more a society issue, since women started working as much as men and the whole sexual liberation men and society started to wait so much more from women compared to before but he same can be said for men too. Society expect so much more from both gender since many many decade be it in terms of attitude / personality / skills or just appearance.

Social media also plays a big role into and can make young people have very toxic views of life / relationship and their appearance.

Before women in general were just expected to be good at taking care of their house, not fat with a cute / pretty face.

Now lots of young people expect perfect face and while before the girl would have been considered pretty now she would be considered as just average because she would be natural. Natural pretty is now considered by a lot of young people as average. People need to be sticking for some people to find them attractive.

The revealing clothing make it a lot harsher on women body too. Before they used to wear long dress that were modest now they have to be perfect clean shaven all the time and skinny with curves at the right place (before the modest dress hide most of the bodies and the curves so it was ways gentler for those who had a little pudge or weren't very curvy to hide it).

Now women have to be perfect mother, perfect worker and perfect in their house cleaning and cooking ability while most men do not help much at all as is it still considered a woman job by majority.

Women are also exected to have sex with men early in relationship but a lot lie to get sex then dump the girl and if she have more than 3 sexual relationship she would be in trouble cause most men don't like high body count. It make it hard for naive girl especially when they're young and don't know better and get manipulated. if the girl don't have sex she's a prude and annoying if she do it hen she's a slut. before it was so much easier for both party. now is full of trouble. We must be quite smart to navigate the dating worlds and avoid the manipulative people.

DizzyDesii · Answer

More like too little. I love surprising a guy and showing him im better than he expected. If we breakup, he never can say i was the bad guy

ProbablyClueless · Answer

No, not even close. Women just roast the shit out of each other for things men don't actually care about. A lot of women make being attractive their hobby.

So by the time a man expresses what he actually wants, women flip out because they think men are expecting all the things women/society tell them, on top whatever new thing the guy is telling them now.

Kaamraj · Answer

No, most men do not expect much from women. They want the woman to be fairly attractive (average) and loyal, that's it. But it's women who have unrealistic expectations from men. More and more women are going for that top 5% of men.

Vegasrunner · Answer

Men only want 3 things from women, it's been the same way sense the beginning of time.

Dongie · Answer

I can't say as I'm not in that generation. Most in my generation had a sense of responsibility tho. Which means they expected a good bit but tried to keep it even.

ManInChains · Answer

It’s the other way around. Women expect too much from men nowadays

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

I expect from her the same things that men expected from her in the 1950's, to be a good devoted housewife!

PeachyPie93 · Answer

Not really considering men pay chicks that do OnlyFans. That is the lowest standards I ever seen lol.

chrissykerdock · Answer

some things yes other things no

itsannalee · Answer

Depends on the men. But mostly everyone expects too much too each other.

straightmax12 · Answer

All men want from women loyalty and cooperation and love. Women today want too much from men.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Some men (and women) have ridiculous expectations of the opposite sex.

sage2021 · Answer

I think they are too afraid to so I said no.

Ladsin2 · Answer

The standards men have for women are nigh nonexistent. Men need to ask for a better class of women.

smurfwrangler · Answer

yes. it is too much to expect them not to be whores

MicahRaine · Answer

Same as my answer for girls.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

If anything, men should expect more

Cheerfull009 · Answer

Both expect more from each other

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