Why is there a double standard for age gap relationships? (Page 2)
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True fact being we really can't say that older men who date younger women is because they like the fresh energy and they can have a sort of understanding and maturity.
Actually its younger women that mostly persue older men because they think that they are more mature if a guy pursued say a girl around 6~8 years younger than him he will be also called the same.
But when a women goes older and persuses young guy its probably just physical because compared to her he would be immature and women are always complaining men are immature and all.
The fact what have noticed is in true sense women have the power to choose their partner than a man, because a man can only pursue a women but ultimately its her decision that counts.
It's just stupid and I hate it so much. My friend dating 13 years older guy than her is okay but when I say that the 19 year old guy (I'm almost 21) is handsome, they all are giving me weird looks and insult me for my taste as well...
Stupidity at its finest.
Probably because historically men traded financial security for a woman's sexual fidelity and child bearing capabilities. At that time an older man was almost always more established and thus able to provide than a younger man was. And a younger woman was more likely to provide healthy heirs. Also, a large % of marriages were arranged and the bride's father wanted someone able to take care of her. Because of this older man-younger woman relationships were common.
The only common method for an older woman to marry a younger man was as in the case of the close kinsman redeemer of a widow in Israel and some other Semite nations. If an older brother married and then died without having children, a younger bother who was unmarried would be expected to marry the widow if/when he came of age.
There are definitely double standards. If I start dating a younger man, men my age automatically shame me "cougar," etc. and try to doom the relationship. And, a lot of these men's fathers teach them to date younger.
When women weren't allowed to work, it made sense to date and older man for financial support. But, those days are long gone. Age shouldn't matter
Ummm... I don't think I've ever heard of a younger woman going after an older man being called a 'predator'. Nor an older woman going after a younger man. I believe the term 'predator' is reserved for older men going after younger girls. Seldom have I ever heard such a guy referred to as 'awesome'. He's usually shamed by women as being 'creepy'.
girls maturity level is higher, and men are the “leaders” and dominant ones so it just “looks better” and “makes more sense” if they’re older.
My boy is 7 years older yet it much more mature 😁
It's become a lot more fashionable but it still is more common for younger guys to look for a fling with an older woman rather than a relationship. A lot of that might depend on the mind set of the younger guy who may not be ready for a full relationship as it is younger or older. I am currently dating 10 years younger.
Honestly I have no issue with being with an older woman than me.
Sure she'd have to be under 50 at least but that's still a giant gap.
In fact old men going after young girls bother me more, partly because it's competition I don't need when it comes to girls my age especially when he's financially and emotionally stable then I'm outmatched.
So I think the standard is whatever you make of it
Younger men who score older women have a legendary status amongst their peers... young girl who score older men definitely don’t have the same status. I have noticed more judgement against guys doing this than women 🤷♀️.
If he's considerably older, he's called a cradle robber. I've in some cases in the past been barred from even having a conversation with some gals, simply because of age. I could be discussing the latest patch to Windows, and be harassed by some third party wannabe chockablock, who thinks he's "protecting" her - when sex was never even an issue! I've never understood why total strangers insist on projecting their sexual insecurities onto me, while I'm minding my own business.
I think men are way more sexual than women. In my opinion, if a guy goes after a woman 10 years or younger , then IS a predator. Likely they won’t have anything in common but they try to make it work become the sex is so good. Especially if she is 22 and younger , she wouldn’t have the experience to know how to pick the right guy
I guess you haven't met a girl who have high sexual drive, or very kinky one...
@Mroz75 I’m talking about men in general are more likely to use younger women for sex
@nella965 i know what you are talking about, but i was referring to the first sentence you wrote.
Also women age faster than men, that's why some men go for younger women. Ofcourse there's some who go just after sex... in the end every person is different!
@Mroz75 it doesn’t matter if women age faster than men If you have absolutely nothing in common with someone over 10 years younger than you. There is a reason why most couples are no more than 10 years apart. You can either date for sex or date for love. I don’t date guys 10 years older due to this fact.
@Mroz75 most women don’t tend to be attracted to guys that are too much older either.
@nella965 you have a point ofcourse, but as i said everyone is different, in any case age is just a number, that's why you see old people who are childish and young people who are mature... or vice versa...
For the second comment in everything in the world, there's some who are with and some who are against.. in the end you can't know what everyone is into or not, if it was males or females, it depends on every person. You may not be attracted but other's do, and you may be attracted to something else but others don't, and the list goes on...
I mean no offense ofcourse, just enlightening discussion 😊
@Mroz75 age is not just a number. The larger the age gap, the higher rates of divorce.
five-year age gap statistically means you’re 18% more likely to divorce (versus just 3% with a 1-year age difference), and that rate rises to 39% for a 10-year age difference and 95% for a 20-year age gap. Partners from different generations may have different cultural reference points and values, and polar opposite tastes in music and film, and even friends, and also have different approaches to their sex life, says Fran Walfish, Beverly Hills psychotherapist and panelist on “Sex Box,” a forthcoming We TV relationship therapy show. “Sex drive goes up for women in middle age, but sexual function decreases for men.”
www.google.com/.../18DF915A-69BD-11E4-BF0C-187229AF9EE3
@Mroz75 but what would you have in common with a 49 yr old woman, If age is nothing but just a number?
@nelly965 I appreciate the effort you just did... as i told you it depends on a lot of factors... not everyone is the same, some couple would be just fine, some would divorce... it depends on a lot of points/factors/personalities, etc.. but going for an age gap doesn't make the person paedophile or predator or whatever... can't go around judging people for their preferences...
It depends on the woman, which rounds up to the point of everyone is just different, i may find everything i ever wanted in a 49yr old woman, and i might find nothing at all!
And same goes for young girl/old guy!
Nella*
I'm not into age gaps anw just to make it clear if it was older or younger... just trying to see it from their point of views... and also knows a lot of couple who have big age gaps, like 10, 15, and even 20 years, and they're still married! And others who have a year age gap, is divorced!
@Mroz75 well unfortunately it makes sense why couples with larger age gaps do not work. Energy levels will become drastically different between two people. May end up with different hobbies. Of course one spouse will turn into a nanny which many folks won’t enjoy. Then they die and you need to get remarried. I see nothing but trouble
MOST folks won’t survive a marriage with large age gaps. It’s a challenging road ahead
I would say that if you’re 10 or more years older than your partner , it is UNLIKELY you have much in common with each other
@nella965 yeah probably... but I'm glad you gave me some insight about it, thank you for it, and ofcourse a lot of unusual things would happen! Weird world out there!😅
But no matter what the case was, don't judge on people, its disrespectful.. and also you wouldn't know any of their reasons!
There's bad, and there's good, but make sure you don't judge, its an ugly trait if I'm being honest with you.
Thank you again, i appreciate the effort you did to enlighten me 🤗
@Mroz75 I think it’s better to marry someone who you can actually grow old with rather than someone who will you will be pushing for during the last 20 years of your marriage. It’s not fun to be a Widow for the last 30 years of life too. It’s very lonely way to die alone
I meant pushing the wheelchair for during the last 20 years of the marriage
@nella965 well if that comment was your first, it would have been a lot better than the one you did, because it changed the whole meaning into a good understanding one!
I strongly agree with you on that one too, losing a loved one isn't good at all, and never would be, and its the same way i see it tbh, having someone to grow old with, although no one knows when his time would come, but at least it gives a lot of hope for spending most of your lifetime together...
@Mroz75 asking someone if age matters is similar to asking “ do you make decisions emotionally and impulsively or do you make decisions logically for what will make you happiest long term?
@nella965 yeah i totally get you and agree too, in the end compatibility is far more important than chemistry, and that's a fact, and also you have to think about it from every way to see if it would really works out or not! Age matters for me and you, but for others it wouldn't matter a lot you know.. so yeah🤷🏻♂️
I don't think that is really a stigma. At least it isn't for me. I recently was in a 5 year relationship with a woman who was 14 years older than myself. I guess it depends on how mature, or not the interactions are to people out in the open. Some people prefer a specific age group, some men, and women are a good fit regardless of the age difference. Be it due to maturity, or just a lot of common ground. I just never necessarily looked at it that way. Though it might be different without my own personal experience, or potentially a far larger age difference?
You could say that its more common to see older men with younger women than it is to see older women with younger men but it's total bullshit to say that guys are perceived more favorably for doing so.
Older guys who date younger women are often accused of taking advantage of their partner just for being older and labeled as creepy, perverted.
See I’m trying to do a term paper for Gender class. How would you include both sexes in my paper? It has to be six pages
Just write about how men suck and that we are to blame for all women's problems.
Lol oh please men don’t suck. Societal norma suck
Well the argument from a biological point of view is that the 'mating' age for males is more than females. So if a male (older) is with a female of younger age they can still mate more than it will be possible if the female was older and male was younger.
Women tend to prefer older men and men tend to prefer younger women. Men's desirability tends to peak much later than women's. If you look at the statistics of age difference between heterosexual married couples, the majority are where the hus band is older; usually by a couple of years. Even in the case of outliers, where there is a relatively big age difference, the husband is usually older.
I honestly don't know. At 30 I was in a relationship with a 50 year old woman. It was definitely fun, she wasn't predating on me (if anything it was the other way round) but my mental state fucked shit up six ways to Sunday.
Your mileage may vary but if it works, it works. Shared experiences are far more important than age.
Let’s see it says your 26 here? WTFWY know about it unless yiur after a minor? Oh I get it another wife board with her marriage comes online to live a fantasy and ask her questing like this but it’s like that really a 50 Something after a teen she can’t have but wants cause she can here? Shut up go cook dinner or sonething!! Lol 😂
Pretty sure she was asking a general question that wasn't directly about her.
Because today's society has it that if a man chases a younger woman then he's either her pimp of sugar daddy and if anyone older woman chases after a younger man she's either his sugar mama or its sne strange incest going on and thats not even true. Love happens in mysterious ways so I don't frown on it at all.
I mean, there are judgmental double standards for every other aspect of dating, why would age be any different? The real question here is why do you care what other people think?
I'm writing a term paper and want to hear what people have to say about it.
Did you pick the topic? What kind of class is that? It’s kind of a straightforward issue that goes back to the same place as most “traditional” gender roles.
Yes I did. Gender, Culture and Society
Art major?
Nah, Sociology, Addiction studies and Psychology major :)
More power to you, I hated my Psychology classes.
I hear you
It seems like there is. I think it is mainly due to men having a more compacted sexual virility than a woman's fertility. He can spread his seed to young women but you're right, if a woman carries a young man's baby, she's looked down upon it. I guess they think her fertile years are almost gone.