What is your preferred first date?

Question

I understand that the current teens and young 20-somethings do things differently, so that's why I ask. If you have a first date to arrange and you know that your prospective partner will agree to whatever you suggest, what is your ideal first date? And why do you choose that over the other alternatives?

My generation usually opts for the traditional dinner date at a fairly nice restaurant. The atmosphere is nice, the restaurant is quiet so we can have some conversation and hear each other, there are no concerns about a bar fight erupting, and we can both verify that the other one does not chew with their mouth open. Once we get an opportunity to make sure that they don't run in the house with scissors, we're good to go! :) :) :)

So what's your ideal first date?

StylesbyDR · Accepted Answer

In my opinion all thr choices suck for dates, especially movie theater first dates cause its pointless waste of time. Whether you are watching it alone or with some one it is the exact same experience. Sitting in the dark, silent, watching a movie for over an hour and learning absolutely nothing about the other. I made this mistake a lot as a teen.

Dinner dates are a little better, casual or not. But at the end of the day its just a free meal for the girl (as I always intend to pay, and I've never met a girl who offered to pay instead, which is fine to me), and because it is in public you might not get to learn as much other than the boring stuff like whatt they do for work or what they do for fun and so on, really basic stuff.

To me the best dates are going out and doing something new that neither of you have done, so its a brand new experience you both experience together. It is a great way to bond while also getting to learn more about one another. When I lived in Minnesota I went snowboarding or skiing while npt knowing how. So we can laugh at each other learning something new.

I've done other things like arcades with mini golf and laser tag, going fishing and then bringing it home to cook, and so on.

The more new the experience or more personal you can make it the better. When people become more comfortable and their enjoying themselves you can get to meet the real them, hiding under the fascade they wear.

Lliam · Accepted Answer

On a first date with someone I am really attracted to, I usually opt for the same thing you described, OlderAndWiser.
I like to look my best and see how she cleans up. It's a good sign if she makes an effort to look good.
It's nice to go somewhere that is a bit elegant and intimate, and where we can sit comfortably and get to know each other.
I've had good success with that.
If we decide that we want to keep seeing each other, follow up dates can be anything - movie, county fair, botanical garden, the zoo, or whatever.

On the other hand, if I'm meeting a blind date or someone I've never met before, an outdoor cafe where we can have coffee is fine. Women sometimes feel more comfortable in a public place where there are other people nearby. And I don't want to commit to paying for dinner if I don't even know if I like the girl.

Yads_Is_Back · Accepted Answer

I don’t have a preferred, but all of those are so common that if I’m not already into the guy and don’t have an attraction yet that he’s not gonna get me on a date with those because I’m used to it and if I wanna do that I’ll go with my friends. Those things are not things that are gonna bring a guy I don’t know into my life.

Honestly, I’ve always liked when the guy is thoughtful about it. It’s really impressive when he really keeps me in mind and thinks about what I like or even just comes up with something creative.

Tiffany_Taylor_Made · Accepted Answer

I haven't been on a first date in a while because I have a fiancee, but I always enjoyed going to the mall for my first dates. I prefer the traditional dinner and a movie, but I also enjoy shopping, so I add that to the date as well. I like the mall because I get to walk around with my date and get to know him while we shop. I like to shop for specific clothes and ask him how they look on me. When we're hungry, we have our dinner at the food court, and we end the date by seeing a movie the mall's theater.

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

I think a nice picnic for first date would be nice.. more casual, less people,... Takes the whole who pays for the first date off the table...

jennifer_bloom · Answer

I like to dance but not the sexually suggestive kind - just normal dance styles with somebody I trust and have been friends with for at least 2 months - also the dancing has to end by 10 cause after 11 I limit all social activity to online convos unless it’s a New Years party

Bluemax · Answer

My preferred first date is with someone I am attracted to. It doesn't matter where we go or what we do. What matters most of all is being into this person.

My first date with my wife was awful. She got seasick. But none of that mattered. I was so into her and vice versa.

I dated a woman I wasn't into. Hoped after getting to know her things would change (it didn't). Went to Disneyland (we both had annual passes) on a weekday in September. Park was empty. Walked on every ride. We laughed! We had fun! We hit it off as friends. We listened to Rod belt out rags on the piano and talked to him. Had a wonderful dinner. Never ran out of conversation (and we spent about six hours together). No awkwardness. Had s great day. Should have gone down in my personal history as a wonderful, charming first date.

And it didn't matter. I wasn't into her and could never be.

So I've come to realize above all else you have to be into the person. Evidence? I married the girl who I had to pull over for so she didn't yak in my car on our first date, not the one I spent six hours with having a great time in the happiest place on earth.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

Somewhere the conversation can flow easily and where we don't feel obliged to act overly "proper". A home-cooked dinner could be ideal even, because home is where the heart is as they say. Although, I guess many women don't wanna come straight to a man's house on first date, they can get the wrong idea that he's just gonna rush her to the bedroom. (Which is probably not an unfounded suspicion, tbf, us guys can be devious fuckers lol)

Something fun but low-key like ice skating or a gaming bar or a nature walk are all up my alley too. Maybe more of a second date thing, because I don't want the activity itself to be the focus, my favourite first dates are the ones where the outside world kinda disappears and we're just in a little wholesome flirty bubble together.

Fancy dates like upscale restaurants I reserve more for a girl I'm already intimate with, and I wanna treat her. (Seeing her dressed to the nines and enjoying her feminine company is its own reward, so I'm not fussy about picking up the check.) I don't have the sort of lifestyle where those sorts of venues are "normal" everyday occurrences, it's more of an 'event' that I save up for and plan at least a couple weeks in advance. So I wouldn't go to all that effort and investment for a girl I just met five minutes ago.

have_a_good_day · Answer

If she's into sports I'd take her to go watch cricket. That way we can spend the day together talking and joking but if the conversation dies out we can watch the game.
Depending on how well it went during the event, we can go to the beach afterwards for a stroll on the sand whilst watching how the moon sits in the sky on a dark night; shining with the light from the sun but the sun doesn't give the light to the moon assuming the moon's gonna owe it one 🤷‍♀️🙆‍♀️

Matt57 · Answer

Probably a picnic as my ideal one, but here are some of my other really good ideas that are a little easier on the both of us and is more practical.

If it’s a woman at my college, I’d like to take her to the tea shop across from campus, get some Boba teas, and go to either the quiet courtyard in one of the old buildings that has orange trees everywhere, or to the Koi Pond by the garden and we could talk and get to know each other more. Maybe the campus Theater would have something going on that evening too.

Another idea I have is going for dinner somewhere downtown on a night when my town has it’s monthly event in the art district where all the theaters and art spaces have their showcases and the local bands are playing too.

jack187625 · Answer

Something fun, slightly competitive. Last time I went on one, coffee, followed by crazy golf, some drinks, a bit off food etc...

Really like the idea of going axe throwing on a first date, but i could see some women not going in for that!

Either way, something a bit different rather than cliché and cheeses ( although cheese has its time and place!)

confusedgamer · Answer

First date I prefer coffee in a quiet place (small restaurant or something), so we can focus on each other without too much distractions.
Second or third date definitely the local zoo, if she is comfy with me talking about the exhibits and plants. (Got lots of info thanks to volunteers work)

MCheetah · Answer

I voted  Option G, Other . Either a board game cafe, laser tag, or a bike ride session. Out of the other options, the next best one would be C: casual dinner at a pizza or burger joint, which we'd probably do after the actual  fun  activity I had in mind, beforehand.

PineappledPizza · Answer

I would go to her house or my house and cook lunch or dinner myself. No! We both can cook something together! Or if no house is used then do out door cooking at the park. Use gas stove. This allows you to talk and get to know them while you're doing something. Makes the conversation have more sparkles since you're talking and doing stuff together as a team.

I think it's more socialy enriching to do an activity while talking than be idle by watching a movie or eating while talking.

Or go out together helping the homeless. Then follow up with making food together.

xJeremyx · Answer

I need something mentally stimulating. Because thats where most of my humour sprouts from. If i see something funny, I would try to piece something laughable together. Otherwise i use events happening around me to start conversations sometimes. For example, when i see a cyclist go by: "Do you like cycling? What recreational activities do you normally take part in? Thats actually quite interesting, maybe i might want to give it a try, although i suck😂😂" You see? future date idea settled.

Coffee dates are ok too, though. its great for sharing personal experiences. And it helps to be a good listener.

Anonymous · Answer

Most young guys only want to take her to coffee as it is a low key, small investment, easy to leave environment in a safe public place for her. For me, I would take her to a nice dinner that is more upscale. If she is worth a date then make it a good date and separate yourself from the fifty guys who took her out for coffee before. Worst case you are out like $30-40 for her dinner and you had a nice meal.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Coffee shop or Theme parks. But im scared the relationship will turn out to be another lrollercoaster”

reptocarl2 · Answer

I think a movie is the worst because it limits conversation. I prefer a bit more upscale dinner because it shows a persons more refined side over casual. A great second date though is the zoo or aquarium

On_cloud_wine · Answer

Cooking up your own homemade meal together and creating your own restaurant experience is nice too.. dancing will be involved.. saves money on uber and overpriced wine. Yes, I’ll be having a glass. A’hem..

okeydoke · Answer

Coffee is low pressure if you’re just getting to know someone. If it’s going well you can always follow it up immediately with something like a walk in the park or a museum trip!

19magic · Answer

Some kind of activity like bowling, going to the arcade, picnic somewhere, something that you can talk about and also still hear each other talk as well

jgokgotit · Answer

My ideal first date would be a picnic or something to do with animals, preferably volunteer work. How well she handles nature is a big thing to me.

Alexandrubaschet08 · Answer

Dinner, a bit more upscale. I like people whit class.  I can see how they act in the good world of the city. I don't want a relaxing simple coffe because things can become whird.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

Tended to be a coffee, or evening drink. Something relaxed, non committal that you can walk away from easily if wanted. Second date would e morw adventurous, if you felt a connection

What is your preferred first date?

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