Guys, Do you respect a girl more if she says she will only have sex with you if you two are in a committed relationship?

[Anonymous]

Yes

No

[TruthBringer]

Yes, I have much more respect for someone who has respect for themselves. We live in a society where casual sex seems like the norm. A girl who keeps herself for the right person is a more trustworthy person. How can I trust a girl who has been sleeping around casually? That's called having no standards and no impulse control. A lot of girls/women use this as a means to get a guy to commit. Those are the type of girls who have NOTHING TO give other than their poonani. And giving sex away so easily is the proof of it.

Sadly, many women learn this the hard way. By the time they do, it's already too late.
So to any girl who is still 'pure', NEVER give away sex unless you're in a committed relationship. That is if you want to increase the chance of getting with a high value man and it's a very effective way to filter out the fuck boys

[SoapySandwich]

Feels kinda prudish and judgy bro. I'd say rather do what you want, if you want sex dont hold yourself back because of silly judgement from others. People who wouldn't trust you because you've had sex aren't really worth it in my opinion, same goes for those who call girls sluts and whores if they have had many partners.

Sleeping around casually doesn't mean you have low standards or make you a worse person.
It usually means you care about your own happiness over some guy that wants you to stay pure.

That being said it shouldn't be used as a tool to make people love you and it shouldn't be used to not lose someone. Make sure it's what you want.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Everyone is free to do whatever (except if it's illegal). If a woman wants to sleep around, then she should to as her heart pleases. She shouldn't complain when she finds herself older, single and no man wants to settle for her since she has been on the Cock Carousel. All of a sudden these "silly judgments" are not so "silly" anymore. Also, this goes beyond judgments. This plays a negative role in a woman's emotional, mental and to some extent her physical health. Promiscuity destroys a woman from within.

You are free to think that people who don't trust promiscious women are "not worth it". I on the other hand see those people as well informed and have a higher degree of self-respect than some dude who settles with a woman who has been digged down by half the town.

And sleeping around does show one has low standards, a low degree of self-respect and a low level of impulse control. Staying pure should be for one's self. Not for the others. And funny how you speak of love. It is no secret anymore that promiscuity affects the bonding capabilities with the new man. So you think she "loves" you? Think again mate.

[SoapySandwich]

There are tons of men who would "settle" usually. Judgements are the problem though. People have one life to live and should live it how they see fit. Standing on the sidelines name calling and judging is just being a dick.

Can you trust a cheater, not really easily but can you trust someone who is open about their life and has had casual sex, sure why not?

Does sleeping around mean you have low standards? No that's up to the partners you pick which depends on how desperate you are.

Does it show you have low self respect? No again that's more determined by your actions.

Does it mean you have low impulse control? No it would only show that of you were struggling to stop doing it.

Yes I speak about love and lots of things affect us negatively but we still do them. Alcohol and drugs for example. I just know people who in my opinion miss out on the potential fun of sex because they waited for the wrong man because he seemed right. Now they're turning to an open marriage to solve it.

I just think there are tons of ways to enjoy life, let people live without judgement.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Everyone has 1 life and should indeed do as they please. That also counts having the freedom to have standards and judge others according to these standards. What matters is that the judgments should be about compatibility and example, not that one sees him or herself superior and having a more worthy life over the other.
We all judge. Even politically correct people do. That’s something you can’t avoid. I may trust someone’s honesty when admitting they have casual sex, but that doesn’t mean I should take them in my life and “trust” them for the sake of being politically correct. If the past didn’t matter, then the military, government or even companies won’t do ‘screening’ when you apply for a job. Why? Because the past is the best predictor of the future. A wise man said that you should treat a promiscuous person like an alcoholist. They may be “sober” for a while, but when the opportunity comes when they go back to their old habits, it most likely will. And I believe this since I’ve seen it happen to others.
And we can argue back and forth about this, but usually, women who sleep around have low standards, low level of self respect, lack impulse control, have poor judgment skills and often also suffer from low self esteem. So by sleeping around, they will not only satisfy their sexual urges, but also get validation which boosts their self esteem.
The best thing we can do is agree to disagree. My knowledge and beliefs are based on not only my own experiences, but that of other more wiser people aswel. I’ve seen way too much already and my mentality has helped me dodge a lot of bullets. And that’s already at the age of 23.
When it comes to judgment, I couldn’t care less about what random people that I don’t know do in their lives. What matters to me is living a good & successful life. And I judge whenever its necessary to JUDGE if something is right to have in my life or not. Have a good one.

[SoapySandwich]

Duh we all judge but it can be done quietly to oneself instead of shaming others.

Nobody says you have to take anyone into your life. You claimed people who have casual sex are impossible to trust which seemed stupid.

Obviously the past matters, I never said it didn't. I just dont think it matters in the way you think.

Prove that casual sex is like an alcoholist. Maybe people who have casual sex dont stop because they dont want to but that's ok. But prove that they can't stop.

Yes women can use sleeping around to try manipulate men or to feel better about themselves. I also dont think those are good reasons to do it. It's like you're saying people shouldn't drink because alcoholics exist. Casual sex like alcohol can be a problem but it isn't always a problem.

You can pick exactly who you want in your life, nobody is forcing anything on you so stop the "slut shaming" and go on with your own life.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich I never said an alcoholist can't stop. Someone who is "sober" for a period of time after drinking their brains out, is likely to fall into the same old habit when he is surrounded by opportunities that encourage him to drink. This is common sense.

And yes, seeing how alcoholics destroy themselves and often their relationships aswel, it's an example why people should be aware of being one. There is a reason why the government here in the Netherlands puts disgusting images of what happened to those who smoke a lot on the packaging of cigerattes, and banned cigerette commercials. To discourage people from smoking.

I have already made my point why I have more respect for someone who doesn't sleep around compared to someone who does. Because someone who does IS a slut with no self respect. So I see no point in respecting someone who doesn't respect herself. In fact, the majority of society thinks this way and for GOOD reason. If that bothers you, then that sounds like a you problem and not a me problem, my friend.

[SoapySandwich]

You are a moronic prude though. You only want 1 partner because frankly that's all you could get. Jealousy makes you shame others. Now dont be pathetic and take your judgement and shove it up your ass, my friend.

Personally I dont wanna do this kinda judgement but that's what you are doing so fine let's both do it and call it even.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Hahahaha look at all the emotions. Yeah I can't get partners and yet I've been in relationships before, had one night stands and am currently in a long term relationship. Sounds like you're battling some cognitive dissonance. We get it little snowflake, you can't handle other people's perspectives differ from yours, especially when you failed in persuasion. Now go cry us a river elsewhere. I speak not only for myself but the majority of me. There is a reason why women who sleep around are being slut shamed. Deal with it, kid.

[SoapySandwich]

You slut shame and throw incorrect information out. Some of the things you say apply to a few people who have casual sex but definitely not all.

I am not battling anything I literally told you in the previous message why I'm throwing shit your way, kid XD.

I can handle you perspective, I just think its flawed and that you need to think things through further.

Tell me how much casual sex must a woman have before her standards are lower?

Tell me why you feel the need to be toxic/slut shame. I mean I am not telling you to date anyone but why shit on people who want to live life differently.

I mean it's like running around saying "people who drink are pathetic cause alcohol fucks with your mind and ruins your life. There is a reason why we drunk shame."

Who cares if you or anyone else doesn't like people's life choices, why not just leave people to enjoy their life how they see fit, even if what they are doing could be slightly bad for them (which I dont think having casual sex is)

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Lmfao seems like someone either doesn't read properly or lacks reading comprehenion. Like I said, I only judge when it's necessary. I couldn't care less about how people lead their lives. My perspectives are only "wrong" because it causes you some cognitive dissonance 😂. And dude, you clearly can't handle other people's perspectives. Hence why you're throwing in "insults" and are still pleading your case here. Pathetic. Go take your white knighting somewhere else, little man. Try to grow a spine aswel. 31 years old and still can't handle the fact that people differ in perspectives. Quite hypocritical when you lecture me about not being judgmental and letting other people do what they want, yet here you are being one yourself and contradicting that statement through your actions. #irony

Like I said, go cry us a river elsewhere. I have more respect for a woman who respects herself and doesn't open her legs freely. Just like most men. Deal with it 😂

[SoapySandwich]

Yeah it does feel like a lack of reading properly is happening. I said I was doing to you what you are doing to girls who have casual sex. Hence it isn't hypocritical, it was more me trying to demonstrate what you are doing. The name calling is included in that.

You seem to miss that point and take it as me being emotional or hypocritical.

You choosing who to respect or who you want to be with doesn't matter at all. I'm not saying love people you dont want to. The only criticism I would give you is stop the slut shaming. I'm not trying to convince you to date them just instead of name calling and stuff just keep that to yourself.

If you want to be super judgmental then some people may take offense and argue back or treat you in a similar manner.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich I only gave my thoughts by answering the question. It's not like I call out women for being sluts in my daily life. Nor do I care that they destroy theirs through promiscuity. All I said was that most men value women more who aren't willing to open their legs so easily. And if it means that I need to slut shame, then so be it. It's behavior that has lead to so many problems in western society already. Hence why we got things like OnlyFans, cheating that happens so much in our day of age, marriage rates dropping, divorce rates are sky high etc. Soo need to encourage it even more. Promiscuity is only hurting society rather than helping it. And you're surprised that slut shaming is a thing. I say, it's much better than being on the politically correct spectrum like you are. Be free to think and say about me whatever you like, it's not like it's going to change much.

Men will never respect women who sleep around. Nor should they. Deal with it.

[SoapySandwich]

Marriage is a stupid thing anyway so who care if its rates drop haha.

Yes I'm surprised slut shaming is a thing but alcohol shaming isn't. in my opinion alcohol is far more damaging than sleeping around. Either people should be allowed to do what they want with their lives or they should have strict rules that stop them.

If you think people should have rules on what they can and can't do with their body then go ahead and slut shame because it appears to make sense with your position.

If you think people can do what they want with their body, then slut shaming doesn't make sense. Why slut shame when you believe what they are doing isn't wrong?

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich People have the freedom to sleep around or intoxicate themselves. That freedom is there. And therefore are free to do what they want. That doesn't mean what they do is right in any way. This also applies to alcohol, yes. That's why I see those who center themselves around partying and alcohol (people of my age and older) as pathetic as many of them have no direction in life. Slut shaming is necessary in order to counter it. Encouraging it will only create more problems for both the person and society. There is a reason why people also fat shame. Which is a better thing than to encourage people to be or stay fat.

Why should I have respect for someone who doesn't respect themselves? I don't. Like I said, you call say all you want, but I've seen, read and experienced enough already that reinforce my views. And clearly, that triggered you lol. It's best for you to be on your way. We simply don't align in perspectives.

[SoapySandwich]

Well you're actively are insulting people who live the same way I do and the same way you did.

Sure we aren't female but I dont think that makes a difference to many points of your argument.

Thus aren't you part of the problem?

Also I know I respect myself. So are you suggesting girls can't have casual sex and respect themselves?

My standards also go up with more casual sex, the more girls I've got the less likely I am to "settle" for someone. Why wouldn't it be the same for girls.

As for things like low impulse control, that's never been an issue with me. I can and have given it all up for committed relationships in the past. Why are you saying a girl couldn't do that.

Show me the evidence for the trash you talk XD

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Lmfao you want "evidence" for what? For me not respecting women who give themselves away so easily? 😂 Clearly on the confirmation bias here. Sorry pal, but I speak from a realistic point of view (which includes what the majority of men think), while you speak from a more idealistic point of view. Like I said, you can't stand the fact that people's perspectives differ from yours. I speak from common sense. A girl who sleeps around is not as respectable as a girl who keeps herself for the right man. Deal with it, buddy. Being free to do as you please doesn't make it right to do as you please. Neither for yourself or society.

If a girl gives me easy sex, I'm glad to take it. It won't grant her respect in return. And neither does the average man with an abundance mindset. We respect women who know their worth. The fact I have to explain this to a 31 year old is already pathetic enough. 😂

And yes, being a man does make a difference. Women look at it from a different perspective. Women are more interested in a man's future, while a man is more interested in a woman's past. And trust me, my body count isn't as high as your average female slut. So I'm not even on their level 😂

Enjoy reading the PDF provided, buddy:
www.heritage.org/.../harmful-effects-early-sexual-activity-and-multiple-sexual-partners-among-women

[SoapySandwich]

No.. try get it into your head I dont care if you respect people. I never once cared about your internal thoughts.

Confirmation bias? Based on what? You just made assertions, what evidence have I ignored?

"... majority of men think" - an argument from popularity?
I dont mind our perspectives differing, I dont care about perspectives just actions.

Prove that a girl who has had 2 partners is less respectable than a girl who's had 1.

I never said people's choices were right once. I just said they weren't wrong. I respect a woman that stands up for and respects herself. I far more respect a woman who will have casual sex and not cower, over a girl who waits for married because it's what she's been told to do. Though I feel I should say, before my words get twisted again I also respect a woman who is waiting doe marriage because it's what she wants to do.

Now onto the evidence you've supplied. I dont think these graphs make your case as clearly as you think.

[SoapySandwich]

Part 2. Had a lot to say about your evidence:

When it comes to sexually transmitted diseases obviously it's worse the more sex you have. Abortion rates and children born outside of marriage would also be higher that's obvious too. I agree that those are issues.

Although why do you supply a document that shows links between the age you lose your virginity and all these issues. The argument isn't will thinks be worse if a girl starts having sex at age X. It makes most of these graphs useless to our discussion. Did you even read it before supplying it?

About marriage stability. Do you see what they define as a stable marriage? Basically every women that isn't married or doesn't want to be married is counted as not a stable marriage. Also women in 1-4 year long marriages also are counted as not stable. It has nothing to do with the marriage being happy. It has everything to do with sticking it out and starting sooner.

Links between happiness/depression and sexual behaviour. Need I explain to you the difference between correlation and causation? A graph showing an inverse relationship between happiness and sexual partners doesn't mean having more sexual partners makes you depressed.

Being depressed might make you drink more for example. Why would you rule out the possibility that depressed or unhappy people seek to find happiness through casual sex?

I dont think you can explain this to anyone really because when I asked you for evidence you provided graphs that dont prove your claims.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Oh how cute, gas lighting now. Respect is subjective, not objective. So showing you “evidence” is as hard as proving that food A tasting better than food B. You can’t since perspectives matter. It could be the case that Food A is loved more than Food B. Same goes with girls who sleep around. A girl who has 2 partners who she has been in committed relationships with and tried to have a future with is far different than a girl who sleeps with guys because yolo.

Your respect over a girl who has casual sex vs the girl who waits till marriage because she is told to is your own view which not everyone will agree with. But that’s something entirely up to you to make up in your mind as you’re free to do so. Same applies with me and my views. I just so happen to find that the majority of men share my views. Even women do so, even though they may not want to admit it. It is clearly seen as women are notorious for being the ones who use slut shaming more than men. It’s a typical female trait to destroy another woman’s reputation in the eyes of others. Ostracization is one of a woman’s biggest fears.

And yes, a woman who WANTS to wait before having sex is much more admirable than the one who does what she is told to do (even though that often does play in her favor anyway).

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich And yes I read it before supplying. It’s basically an entire PDF I sent you which you can see for yourself that there are many factors tackled which lead to the same conclusion: Promiscuity hurts a woman, regardless of the factors. <-- reason why slut shaming is alive and why many high value men refuse to settle for a used up woman. And since sluts are mostly active in their Prime years, it shows that they suffer even at that time (happiness is compromised). Also, marriage is often done when a woman is in her prime years. Which is why the graphs about martial stability is so crucial. Not my fault that you struggle with some cognitive dissonance that prevents you from seeing the very evidence of the effects of promiscuity, which in turn reinforces why people don’t respect those who sleep around (aka sluts).

And people who seek happiness through sex proves my point in lacking poor judgment skills and act out of naive behavior. As casual sex rarely if not impossibly leads to any happiness.
And thanks for proving my point. Like I said, you clearly can’t stand people differ from your perspectives. Hence why you’ve written me two essays and are still pledging your case out of your own ego. While I tried to end this little ‘discussion’ of ours by acknowledging that we both can agree to disagree. You’re not going to achieve anything by arguing against a statement which is not only near impossible to change, but is shared by the majority. After all, I’m not arguing that the earth is flat. So once again, do us both a favor and be on your way.

[SoapySandwich]

I again am not asking you to prove that you respect a girl more than another... you claimed girls who sleep around are less respectable. That isn't about personal opinion.

Yes I know women slut shame each other and I also think it would be better if they didn't.

The pdf doesn't lead to the conclusion that promiscuity hurts women. As it could simply be the possibility that hurt women are promiscuous. Again correlation isn't causation.

Measuring the stability of a marriage that people aren't in is ridiculous haha. What if promiscuous women on average settle down later in life or choose not to get married. The results would be the exact same. The graph just shows that fewer promiscuous women are in 5 year long marriages.

Do people have more sex because they are unhappy or does more sex cause people to be unhappy? You seem to want to claim both is true yet your pdf presents no evidence which one is the cause. It may also be the case that they dont cause each other and instead the age you lose your virginity is the factor that drives both happiness and amount of sexual partners.

To say having sex when you are sad Is lacking poor judgement skills then most of the world has poor judgement skills, people drink, binge eat, self harm and use drugs when they are feeling depressed. Should we judge them all.

I have no problem that out perspectives differ. If I had an issue with it why would I still be here XD. I enjoy debates they are fun.

I am mostly arguing about your lack of evidence or at least the ways you seem to be misrepresenting data to come to your conclusions.

You also dony need to tell me to be on my way. Really if you want to stop the discussion then dont have it anymore. Nobody is forcing you, it is not my job to save you from it.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Thiings like binge eating, drinking and self-harm are part of lack of impulse control. Even though people know it doesn’t do them any favor. And yes, A LOT of people have these issues. If it's most of the world, I would like to see where you got that.
The graphs focuses a lot on marriage, but not entirely. They still speak volume about the affects of (early) promiscuity on women over time.

The PDF says:
_ “Women who have more non-marital sexual partners are more likely to have abortions. “
- “Women who have more non-marital sex partners are more likely to be single mothers.”
- “Finally, the greater the increase in the number of non-marital sex partners, the lower the probability of personal happiness.” (chart 17 & 18)

All these charts sampled 10000 women. If people have more sex because they are unhappy or more sex cause people to be unhappy could be both reasons. That is why they take a big number in order to mix all the personal reasons together and eventually look at the bigger picture. So that exceptions don’t make become their conclusions. And the bigger picture is: The more partners you have, the less happy you are. This is the rule. What their personal reasons may have been is now irrelevant compared to the bigger picture. Sorry mate, nut bringing exceptions to the rule, it doesn’t disprove the rule itself. The proof if right in front of you, but you can’t take it since it doesn’t suit your confirmation bias.

To want “proof” if people respect a non-slut more than a slut is like a flat-earther asking for proof about the earth being round. It simply is. It’s common sense. Girls who sleep around are less respectable. If you like it or not. This is common sense. Go ask your average dude who he respects more. I’m pretty sure that most of the answers you’ll get is what I’m saying. Why do you think the manosphere is getting bigger and bigger.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Try not to insult my intelligence. The askwer asked for my opinion and I have given it. Which seem to have triggered you and called it "prudish" and "judgy". There is no point in having this "debate" since I'm trying to teach a 31 year old about common sense he is unwilling to see. Which is: most people don't respect sluts more than non-sluts. Neither men nor women. Go ask the manosphere about this, I'm positive that they are willing to explain it all lol. This study proves why women should refrain from promiscuity not just for themselves, but for their (future) relationships.

I'd say, show me to proof to the contrary of what I'm saying. Other than that, this "debate" is going nowhere.

[SoapySandwich]

If people have more casual sex because they are unhappy then promiscuous behaviour isn't the cause of them being unhappy. Thus sleeping around won't make you unhappy. You are just more likely to sleep around if you are unhappy. So a happy woman can have casual sex and stay happy.

The issues with STDs and pregnancy are real issues that do go up but that is obvious again. Worth pointing out but not worth slut shaming over.

The problem is you can't know what the exceptions are from those graphs and you can't determine causation.

Again I didn't ask for proof that people respect "non-sluts" more. Why do you keep going to that?

I am asking for proof that people who have casual sex aren't respectable, as in proof they are not worthy of respect. That has nothing to do with whether or not people do respect them.

Also proof that casual sex is bad for mental wellbeing and bad to the extent that it could be justified to judge/shame others.

Asking average dudes as you suggest doesn't get me those answers it just gets me opinions.

I may have to insult your intelligence as you seem to completely miss the point, I dont care what the popular opinion is. I care about what is right and popular doesn't mean right.

For all we know your study could just show people from shittier households are more likely to lose their virginity at a younger age and sleep around more. We dont have any causal links to suggest one thing causes another.

Asking for proof to the contrary is a useless attempt at shifting the burden of proof. You made the claim thus you require the evidence. I just dont see any evidence that casual sex CAUSES unhappiness or problems bonding in future.

Thus shaming people who chose that lifestyle seems stupid.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Unhappy people having sex already shows they have issues and try to drown them with casual sex, which is a contradictory action. This only reinforces the fact they have poor judgment skills and lack knowledge. And once again, you wouldn’t know that from the statistics. Hence once again, they take a big number of people and make conclusions based on a bigger picture. Which eliminates exceptions (and causation) to the rule. And no, I don’t believe casual sex makes a woman happy as plenty of women (especially feminists like Amy Horton) who go on that path have proved the contrary.
You want proof to the very same thing I’ve already answered you about. It’s common sense. People don’t respect those who have casual sex as much as those who don’t sleep around. Common sense that is and you’re just beating around the bush. Burden of proof isn’t really needed since it’s COMMON SENSE. I’ve yet seen only 1 guy here share your view, while the rest share mine. And I’ve already given you a source that back my views on those who sleep around. You can speculate all you want about the study. It’s from the CDC and it’s there. You can rationalize all you want, it doesn’t disprove what I say either.
And I’m all for shaming those with a lifestyle that contribute to the degeneracy of (western) civilization. So no, I actually think it’s a wise thing. If we are going to reward or remain silent of bad behavior which is harmful to both person and society, then we are only dooming ourselves and our future offspring.
So I’m all for slut shaming if it means discouraging someone else from doing something which is detrimental to herself or others. So contrary to your belief, popular is right.

Like I said, this “debate” isn’t going anywhere. I’m constantly repeating myself and common sense. So once again, let’s agree to disagree and be on your way.

[SoapySandwich]

You claimed casual sex causes unhappiness which hasn't been demonstrated. If women are unhappy and thus use casual sex as a coping mechanism then they dont deserve ridicule (slut shaming). They require help instead.

I'm also not claiming casual sex makes people happy. I mean I think the act definitely does but that's not long term happiness.

I'm still not asking you to prove what the common opinion is XD

7 guys here seem to share my view, not just 1?

I'm not trying to prove that casual sex has no negatives. Im also not trying to disprove your claims. I am just asking you to prove them.

I still dont see casual sex as a harmful activity. There needs to be a demonstration that it actually causes the harm. Otherwise you are just assuming it's the problem.

Also popular isn't right. What I think you were trying to say is "in this case the popular opinion is right" which I disagree with but when I say popular doesn't mean true. I am not speaking of the casual sex topic. I'm speaking about using popularity as evidence.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich It's 3 to 1 that share my opinion here with us not included. Also, popular believe in this regard stems from reasons why sluts are frowned upon. And I've already explained why. I never claimed that popularity itself is always an evidence. That depends on the topic. People used to think the earth was flat when it wasn't. There are articles on websites like Psychology Today written by professors that explain how casuel sex can negatively affect a person. Like this one:
www.psychologytoday.com/.../how-casual-sex-can-affect-our-mental-health

This is not the only one. All you have to do is just search for them. Where one part says: "Researchers examining the mental health associations of hookup sex also report that participants who were not depressed before showed more depressive symptoms and loneliness after engaging in casual sex.". But even then, the less happier may simply be more promiscuous. I personally still avoid unhappy people because I've dealt with them in the past and they all caused collateral damage.

Even 'the Atlantic' has covered the topic "why Fewer Sex Partners Means a Happier Marriage" and dive into statistics. And it doesn't matter if you're interested in marriage or not. This speaks volumes about quality of a relationship and the ability to pair bond.

Also, in the real world, try to look at feminists and see how "happy" they are in their choices, relationships and lifestyle compared to more conservative women. And more specifically, to how both see and practice sex. As feminists can be very promiscuous.

You've asked for sources to prove my claims, well here are some more. These only reinforce my view on the matter and why I very much respect and desire a woman more who isn't willing to spread her legs so easily. The respect is mostly because a woman chooses not to be an easy sextool, but has standards for who she gets intimate with. If you agree with this or not is none of my concern. Everyone is free to believe what they want.

[SoapySandwich]

15 out of 22 people share your opinion that they personally will respect a female more if they have sex in a committed relationship. That doesn't demonstrate their opinions on links between casual sex and depression or other negative results. Also doesn't show their opinion on slut shaming which I'd expect to be a lower percentage of men.

This article you have found again seems lacking. It is far more complicated than simply asking people if they are happy.

In your article they explain why their method doesn't really demonstrate it and point to another small sample size study that does. They however at the end of the article dont jump to conclusions saying more study is probably needed.

You may avoid unhappy people, it might will be better for your own positivity. That although doesn't make it ok to judge or verbally abuse unhappy people.

I still dont see the evidence for a causal link between casual sex and unhappy marriages.

In the real world, modern day feminists that I've seen seem rather crazy and bad at justifying what they believe or have bad reasons behind their desires. Eg: wanting a female president because she would be female.

Casual sex is not a simple topic and the issue seems to be you treat it as it is.

I can't post links here but in other studies that go more in depth it appears that the reason behind having casual sex affects the results a lot when studying depression.

Autonomous (“Right”) motives:

Wanting the fun and enjoyment.

Wanting to explore and learn about your sexuality.

Believing it is an important experience to have.

Nonautonomous (“Wrong”) Motives:

Wanting to feel better about yourself or to avoid other unpleasant feelings.

Wanting to please someone else (e. g., your partner or friends).

Wanting to get a favor, material reward, or revenge.

Hoping it would lead to a long-term relationship.

Not actually wanting to hook up, but being somehow tricked or coerced into it, or too intoxicated to make a responsible decision.

[SoapySandwich]

Sorry for the lack of formatting, it doesn't like to copy paste from other articles haha.

The results looking into reasons found that doing it for the right reasons appear to have no negative side effects in terms of mental wellbeing.

So I'd say casual sex isn't a problem. There are just incredibly wrong ways to go about it.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Everything seems "lacking" because it's hard to conclude a causation with these topics. Especially when it comes to a irrational factor as happiness. However, we see there is a correlation between being unhappy and promiscuity, same goes for all other factors mentioned that are a result being promiscuous.

I couldn't find anything about your "source (s)", at the same time, not sure what you're trying to prove. And I'm not shaming people because they are unhappy, not sure where you got that from. I shame sluts for having a mentality like Amber Rose and her followers. Who think it's a great thing to do self sabotage and contribute to destroying young women.

Also, the question was about respect, not slut shaming. It's you who brought up slut shaming, not me. And I wasn't I slut shaming in my main comment. I've let you use strawman arguments to divert the conversation from my main point long enough. The question is if I respect a woman more if she has higher standards in regards to sex. And my answer is yes. Regardless of that woman is happy or unhappy.

Like I said before, this "debate" is not even a debate and I have no desire to backpeddle to the same things any longer. I think I've proven my point and have shown sources that clearly show a connection between negative factors like unhappiness, lower quality relationships and promiscuity. And cherry picking things out of these sources to discard them and to fit your own narrative is an effective way to deny yourself the sight of the bigger picture and showing you're not open to understand and learn. So clearly, no matter what I show you, you'll be searching for that one thing to discard the entire source, rather than reading and learning what that source has to show you. And frankly, it's a waste of time to "debate" someone like that.
My point still stands like most men. I respect women who have standards when it comes to intimacy.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich So have a good day sir, it's best to leave it at this ;)

[SoapySandwich]

Exactly it is very hard to conclude causation. Thus we can't really say if casual sex is good or bad. I do agree that it can be bad if used for the wrong reasons.

I am not saying you are shaming people because they are unhappy. I am suggesting shaming people who are trying to use casual sex to combat their own depression seems stupid. Not saying that's what you are doing, just pointing out that causation really matters in my opinion.

"Who think it's a great thing to do self sabotage and contribute to destroying young women" - that seems like a strawman, I dont think they think that.

You kinda did shame in your first message. Claiming people who have casual sex as having no standards and no impulse control seems like shaming to me or at least baseless accusations which dont seem fair.

If we stick to the main question of whether you respect women who sleep around then we would have no disagreements. It's up to you who you respect and I won't argue about whether you should or shouldn't respect them.

Although you threw in extra claims which I disagreed with.

If I wasn't open to learn then why would I read all your "proofs".
There is a problem with your studies, you want to make general claims about casual sex which you aren't proving with your sources. If your argument is casual sex can lead to depression, then I agree with you. That doesn't mean casual sex causes depression.

I will gladly learn what the source has to show me if you can explain why my objections to the source are wrong or irrelevant.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich My “accusations” aren’t “baseless” as I’ve already shown what reinforces my beliefs, but to each their own. From what I’ve experienced, the women I described are often the ones who end up cheating or bring problems within relationships.
And no they don’t partake in destroying other women on a conscience level, although some of them actually do. Doesn’t take away that they are harmful to others.

And sorry pal, my sources, especially the book of charts do prove that there is a correlation between all the negative things I’ve mentioned and promiscuity. Not my problem you refuse to believe it. Facts remain facts. Feel free to discard them, it won’t change the reality that they remain facts.

And I’ve already explained your way of looking at these sources and your way of cherry picking to discard an entire source to fit your own narrative. That shows closed-mindedness on your end. And I’ve never claimed casual sex is the cause of depression. Like I’ve said, to each their own. You are free to disagree with me as I am free to disagree with you. Once again, have a good day ;)

[SoapySandwich]

You've supplied no proof that all people what have casual sex dont respect themselves or that they have low standards. Hence your claims are kinda baseless.

I agree there is correlation. That could be for a number of reasons and thus isn't conclusive that casual sex is the problem. So I do believe it (again that is what a strawman looks like by the way XD)

I haven't cherry picked or disregarded. I've pointed out flaws which you seem to fail to address. You just point out correlation which isn't sufficient to determine if casual sex is the problem or if problems lead to it.

Also:
Is Casual Sex Hazardous to Your Mental Health?

Posted on psychologytoday. com is the source for me saying casual sex being good or bad seems more about the reasons people do it.

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich A woman who sleeps around is considered to have lower standards compared to a woman who keeps her legs shut unless certain conditions are met. Often, this goes hand in hand with self respect along side other factors I have previously mentioned. This is mere logic and common sense. Something you fail to address yourself. No need to bring “sources” into this matter. The sources I’ve sent you explains what reason behind my belief and that of many others. In your eyes I have supplied no proof, I believe I have more than enough.

To me, and many others, the correlation is already enough to disregard certain people. Because in many cases, it’s a sign that there is something going on. The point of my post was never about causation, that’s you who diverted the conversation towards.

As I said before, feel free to believe whatever you like. I’ve already made my point.

[SoapySandwich]

I can agree that a women who sleeps around is often considered to have lower standards. If you mean they are also considered to have less self respect then there I agree as well. Many men do seem to share those beliefs.

I only disagree when you assert those points as facts eg: "women who sleep around have lower self respect and lower standards". That isn't really logical or common sense in my opinion. I will say though if this is what you meant all along you may have worded it unfortunately before and cause far more discussion than needed, however I don't think you did that.

Agreed correlation is a sign that something is going on. I brought up causation as you seem to make a great deal of causation claims. Saying casual sex destroys a womans ability to bond for example. I also do it because the cause matters far more if you intend to "slut shame".

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Most of what I said is correlation, not causation. This includes the pair bonding thing. Glad we are more on the same line ;)

[SoapySandwich]

That's good then 😅 I guess you just believe it's ok to slut shame with correlation alone and I prefer having a causal link first before I judge behaviours or people. If that is the case then I guess we've covered all the ground we could here haha.

Great debate 👍

[TruthBringer]

@SoapySandwich Not just correlations, also core principles and values. But to each their own, mate ;)

[SoapySandwich]

Yeah that too XD

[Reaperbot666]

I would respect her much more overall if she wanted to wait. until we became a exclusive couple before having sex. because I don't engage in modern hookup culture myself. so I only have sex with my exclusive relationship partner. because sex should be something that helps a couple build a deeper bond.

• I tend to have 4 rules when dating someone new.
• 1. no sexual interaction until were in a exclusive relationship together.
• 2. no sex until we have been dating at least 90 days.
• 3. both of us get tested for STD's and other nasty things to prove we're clean.
• 4. we both use protection to reduce risk of unplanned or unwanted pregnancy.
• if a female partner can't follow those. their most likely not worth my time.

[SoapySandwich]

I respect her decision but I dont really respect her more because of her choice. I also dont respect her less because of it.

What does make me respect he more is that she stood up for herself and is trying to live the life she wants regardless of what that is.

This also applies to girls who say they just wanna have sex and not be in a committed relationship.

[CaptainOverthink]

I voted No.
But this is what I mean^.
Well said.

[TheFlak38]

ah yes. the type of girl seeking a slave, using sex as a bargaining tool to get attention, gifts, money and special favours while at the same time doing some alpha fucks behind the slave's back. I've seen plenty of those. How about a big fat FUCK OFF?

[Asker]

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLL

[Asker]

You clearly need therapy, this site isn’t the place to get it. Best of luck to you

[TheFlak38]

Yeah ok. How many times has every man on the planet heard such dumb replies? Every time a man talks about female nature he's somehow problematic.

[Skankhunt]

Absolutely, it shows that you respect yourself and that you have values and principles.

[admles]

It literally has no effect on my respect whether we have sex on the first date, or after a month.

[AlexanderAnttila]

Yes.