Would you call a white guy racist if he tells you he refuses to date white girls who prefer black guys?

[Anonymous]

In April this year I broke up with my then girlfriend for that very reason and since then, I've been known as "the racist guy who broke L.'s heart."

But the truth is, I found out that she was used to being vocal about liking black guys in the past and I felt like she was taking me for granted in our rel'ship, then my love for her started vanishing time after time and I ended up falling in love with one of her friends, whom I've been happily dating since then. People even forget that I technically cheated on my girlfriend before we broke up and that one of her besties seduced me, they have only been calling me racist to this day.

I don't think I could be any more considerate to my ex at that time since 1) I couldn't have guessed that she had a race preference. 2) My love for her was gone. 3) I felt in love with another woman, who happened to be her friend.

[Don-__-Don]

Because they think you don't like black people.

I mean, come on dude, it's easy to see how that they came to that conclusion.

This is what they thought:

"Oh you so won't date a white girl because she likes black guys? Why? Is it because you don't like black people so much that you won't date anyone that's black?"

Like, come on now, don't be oblivious to the way people think, you know how people are.

Now, I'll be honest with you here.

When there's a white girl and she has a thing for black guys I tend to feel the way, I loose intrest, because I'm going to share something with you on what I've noticed.

It's been an ongoing theme of when a girl who likes me tells me she like black guys, she seems to like the "trap" kind, like the ones who are just stereotypically black in on way or another.
And then those are the same girls who think about the stereotypical "BBC" thing.

Like dude, I'm just going to show you a photo on what comes to my mind when I think of theae types:

Needless to say, I'm not down with that shit.

On of my female bestfriends are one of these types, She took intrest in me and I never did because she just demonstanted so much on how she liked a certain type of black guy, and as for me? Let's just say I'm often told that I act like the whitest black you you'll ever meet. Whatever the hell that entirely means.

I'm not saying that all white girls who like black guys are like this, but the ones I've meet, they are.

Anyways I'm ending it here, don't wanna ramble on too much.

[Asker]

That's fine, dude. I found your comment very interesting and mature, as you didn't judge me.

From my experience, all "snowbunny" white girls either love the thug stereotype or they just love the attention they get when they behave like that, whether it's good or bad attention.

This kind of behavior isn't specific of them though, as those girls have a white male counterpart too, the Weeb guys who're obsessed with Asian girls. They're both like the mirror image of each other since they both love stereotypes, not real individuals and cultures, they're both shallow, obsessive and so forth. Point is, white women have no problems in rejecting those guys, but they make a fuss if we guys reject white women like that.

In my case, there are legit issues to talk of me, I mean... I cheated on my ex with one of her best friends and jumped into a rel'ship with her right after my ex and I broke up. People could call me "the mofo who cheated on L." or call me and my new girlfriend "two selfish people who backstabbed L." OK, I don't agree, but I'd understand that. Their fixation with calling me racist is just weird though.

[Don-__-Don]

Thank you, definetly not judging you here because I totally get where you're coming from, just wanted to tell you my little bit on the issue.

And yep, the Asian/weeb thing is a good example.

The white women having no problem rejecting those types of guys while they turn around and make a fuss if a guy does it is just another double standard as far as I'm concerned.

And it's good that you do understand when people do may say something negative about you (like with the example that you gave) , but yes the whole racist thing is just people jumping to conclusions.

[Asker]

Damn, that's why I like G@G. I think in no other social media I cpuld have a mature conversation about this. When I asked for advice on r/relationship_advice, Redditors turned the whole thing into a witch hunt and I got dozens of comments calling me racist. LMFAO.

I won't even try to justify what happened because it was a bit fucked indeed, although people attack me for the wrong reasons.

In spite of everything, I wouldn't trade my current girlfriend for my ex or any other woman I dated before... Girl is really awesome.

[Thatasianlove16]

Because it obviously makes you feel like just a fetish as well I don’t like dudes that say oh I like black women. Because it just shows that they just like me because I’m black I don’t like that if you’re gonna like me like me for my personality not my skin color.

[Thatasianlove16]

The only reason why I didn’t agree with this is because I have a friend who prefers black guys. She won’t date white guys. So the fact that your ex dated you seems like more of the fact that she likes you for your personality and skin color doesn’t really matter to her. Yeah I agree with him your wording on it made you seem racist. But I understand where you were coming from. But honestly I don’t think that she was the right person to use this example on because she obviously was fine that you were white

[Asker]

@Thatasianlove16 Dating for personality is kinda "meh." Dating someone because they're the ideal person in our minds (oh, yes, our type), because we find them irresistibly attractive, because we want to make them happy and because we wanna see them smile is much better.

But it all comes down to what we want for ourselves in the first place. I want a full romantic experience like we see in the books, not a companionship for a stable relationship, maybe that's why I've fallen in love with my current girlfriend.

[BjornIronPeenus]

I don't know why a white guy would date a white girl who prefers men that look the opposite of what they look like lol. Makes no sense to me and the relationship will never last. You did the right thing.

[Thatasianlove16]

Wait just because she had a usual preference doesn’t mean they didn’t have a chance lol. If all the white dudes were intimidated by the fact that I dated black dudes I would only be dating that black dudes. Doesn’t mean I’m not open to another race lmao if that’s a guys reason for breaking up with me I would call him racist too lom

[BjornIronPeenus]

That's not what I said. If a white girl prefers black guys then she wouldn't make a good match with a white man. If I dated a black girl and told her I prefer white girls that would make her feel bad about herself now wouldn't it.

[Thatasianlove16]

But she was vocal about liking dudes before and he just broke up with her. And he heard about her talking about liking black dudes and he was already through with her, history of liking black guys is not a good enough reason. That’s racist. But the real reason was that he no longer had feelings for her and was in love with her friend. Which this makes this extra scummy

[Thatasianlove16]

Not everyone has one type of course she’s gonna be talking about black guys if she’s with a black guy

[Asker]

@thatasianlove16 Oh, no, no, no. I think that if a woman has a race preference that puts you BELOW others in her "list," this is a reason good enough to break up with her or not even dating her... Also, I'm a hot dude, I don't need to fight for scraps. And there's another huge factor: I fell in love with another woman.

Call me unrealistic if you want, but I believe no one is meant to be someone's silver medal, we all have a true soulmate and it's our job to find them and enjoy a life based on real love. I'm sure I found mine, and she happens to be my ex's former bestie, lmfao.

[Thatasianlove16]

But that’s just how you’re taking it. She just may have been with black men. So if she was with him long enough she might’ve started to talk about white man. Like when I am with an Asian dude I will talk about Asians. If I’m with a black man I will be talking about black men. If I’m with a white dude I’ll be talking about white dudes. If I’m with a Puerto Rican I’ll be talking about Puerto Ricans. Doesn’t mean I have a specific type if she had a specific type then she wouldn’t have been with a white dude. I think he came from just a very very insecure place. Plus He likes another girl so I personally can’t side with him or you on this

[Asker]

@Thatasianlove16 It's not "him" but me. LMFAO. We're talking about me. And I don't have to prove my confidence to anyone, women use this talk about confidence as a manipulation tool in the same way men slut shame women. At the end of the day, it's just "you either do what I want/think it's right or else you're insecure/a slut." I don't fall for it.

I know that cheating on my ex with her bestie wasn't a real example of good behavior on my part, but, despite everything, I was right, my current girlfriend is tge love of my life and I wouldn't trade her for any other woman I dated before. People say that God writes straight with crooked lines, it definitely makes sense!

[BedheadGreg]

No I do the same for black girls who date white guys.
It's more to do with the women than the guy