Is it woman really "automatically" BetaNizing man who uses "dating apps"?

[romeo_and_cats]

In my personal experience which is not little, I never needed the use any of these apps, but I heard guys getting *still* getting disappointed before and after meeting girls through these apps, I lived in lisbon for a while and saw lots of girl meeting guys by tinder *at that time* and giving him orders, treating him like a shit, giving a hard time. In the streets, I'm directly to the point and that never fails.

I tried for example the minimal effort possible in the app, actually I just tried every type of behavior possible, being friendly, indirect and being direct sexually or flirting. The same way that I flirt when I meet a girl by streets, before or after grabbing her number which usually never fails *normally I wouldn't grab number and go from there, but* by counterpart I got massively murdered in dating apps if I flirt. I guess the girl assume I'm an average guy, and average guys aren't supposed to flirt.

Just few notes: I DO NOT HAVE A PROFILE PHOTO intentionally!

I know it's a "no no" and maybe a turn off or it leads to girl to think the guy may have appearance problems. But instead I don't want the lots of girls who I normally date to see me in a dating app. Keeping a low profile.

Which leads me to the second question: Girls base attraction + by looks? I strongly suggested it doesn't, but now I'm concerned they do!

[Truthbewithyou]

There's so much that can be said about this that most opinions are going to be perspective based.

I will give my perspective on the women, then the men, then I will bring them together. As well as, my opinion on your experiment and your view.

The women:
Most women who online date have low self esteem. They are either overweight, or not that attractive, or both. They don't like their options in real life so they turn to online dating for "better" dating options. Most of these women are looking for tall or attractive men or both and to receive commitment from their perceived "better" options.

The men:
Most of the men who online date are desperate and have trouble getting women. Most of these guys are short, or unattractive, or both. Overweight, or are socially inept. They can't get options in real life so they turn to online dating. Most of these men want attractive women and sex. However, very few are able to exercise options due to the lack of. So, they will have to take what they can get.

The men and the women:
Both are in a place looking for "better". Except, they will soon learn they will have to pick amongst each other. As a result, for example: the overweight woman ends up with the short unattractive guy. Yet, neither were online dating for that result. As a result of this, a man may attract a woman who mistreats him. This is due to her wanting better but she is unhappy with her reality of options. Yet, she doesn't have better options and she knows the guy is least likely to do better because he too does not have better options either. It also goes the other way. A woman may attract a man who degrades her because he does not value an overweight woman. If he could have gotten a slimmer woman he would have but those options are not available to him. It's bitterness in themselves.

So far as your experiment, Having no photos does signal to women that you are unattractive. Remember, these women are looking for "better" options. A man with a profile but with no photo isn't better. It signals lesser. A major factor of attraction are looks. The eyes see first. If looks wasn't a factor, then tinder wouldn't be a thing.

[romeo_and_cats]

Hi ) thanks for your answer! You're welcome here!

I'm actually astounding for your answer, it opened a black hole to my mind for a lots of things that i never thinked before, like:

- in dating apps that may be a lot of creepies and needy
- may the guy need to prove much more of himself
- yes (automatically) competence
- how ranking is defined? Through photos,
- I'm thinking by now that the photos tells everything
- hence the much exigency to know all about the other person, work, hobbies, profile description and how much intelligent or life he is/has

Thanks! You opened a universe inside me, because I actually never need any of this and now I strongly believe maybeI'll never need it

[Truthbewithyou]

Yes in dating apps most of the guys want sex yet, most of them women want relationships. This is why a woman who isn't that attractive will receive a lot of attention. It's because majority of those guys too aren't that attractive and are sex starved. When the unattractive guys want sex so bad, they're least likely concerned with the quality of the woman because they do not have options. Very few genuinely want a relationship with a low quality woman and many women do not want a relationship or to just have sex with low quality men. This is why ghosting is so common in online dating.

Yes. The more attractive you are in your photos, the more traction you will receive. I wouldn't say photos tell everything but they do tell a lot. Photos tell if you are attractive, if you travel, your comfort level about yourself, and it gives insight to your life. Whether or not you receive a message or a reply is mostly based on the other person taking a liking to your photos.

[romeo_and_cats]

Everything that you says is that if the guy is confident, comfortable with himself, and his personality. I really don't believe looks matter, because personally I go for personality first looks secondary but when you're younger since no one has developed a great personality yet they go for every superficial aspect of others while not fixing their own. The problem lacks in understanding "the self" first with those leaked ideals, money doesn't bring attraction because I've been millionaire once and it does attracts the wrong type of woman while scare the rest. Not all woman are fat in Tinder and short doesn't necessary mean ugly.

But I your get point here when you say people want more not less, for a woman is hard to keep a valuable man *for me it means alpha* consciously or not. For a guy he wants to quickly settle down.

[Truthbewithyou]

Yes, it doesn't stand for every man nor every woman. It is the scope of the majority of the gender groups. It is what most men and most women avoid when online dating. No matter how we personally feel, what we personally go for, or if it appeals to us as individuals or not.

I understand what you're saying and I do agree.

[Sarahplus2]

Looks personality and all that is one package to me. Many guys are looking for sex on dating apps so us women have to wade through to find a good guy.

[AzzaBlue]

From personal experience, dating apps/ sites are basically a meat market where the vast majority of women are extremely shallow. Women on these platforms get way too much attention that elevates their egos to astronomical heights. I find that the vast majority of these girls (not women) to be very uninteresting and unimpressive and of very low quality. Yet because they get so much attention, a girl that is a 3 thinks that she is an 8 which likely doesn't accurately reflect reality. Unfortunately many women fall for this trap due to being spoiled for choice and it will lead to many feeling bitter and jaded by the experience as they couldn't find anyone that they 'feel' is suitable for them.
As far as betanizing I couldn't really say.

[romeo_and_cats]

I agree to every piece of this statement👍