Trust this guy?

[Anonymous]

I found this guy on an online dating platform and we seemed to have similar philosophies on life. I talked for about a month and the guy seemed very thoughtful, compassionate and accepting. I found him very open-minded; we shared many experiences with each other and it was easier for me to talk to him. But I always had this doubt in me that he was way older than what claimed to be (he told me he was 28). Partially because he has a stellar career and finished his Ph. D. with 2 Masters. The age just didn’t add up. I asked him from the very beginning about it and he kept denying it. I didn’t plan to look forward to anything serious, but I figured I liked talking to this guy and noticed that I was investing a lot of time in it. Long story short, I found out he was about 6 years older than what he claimed (making him 34 y/o) from a picture album of his. When I asked him again about his age, he repeated the same answer. He didn’t admit it till I told him that I saw his pictures. He also admitted to lying to me about being divorced. This really disappointed me. I would have accepted that he hid being divorced as we haven’t been talking too long. I also asked him what was wrong in his marriage. To which he said, he fell out of love and cheated. Now, this is my very first experience where people downright lied to me about who they are and it made me very confused. I would understand that people try to lie/hide the things they are guilty/ashamed of (trying to justify his lie about his marital status). What I don’t understand or can’t justify is the lie about his age. I need someone else’s logical perspective on this matter since I keep assessing it emotionally.

[Punkbuster107]

It sounds like he was behaving a little sociopathic. He seems to have wanted to manipulate a certain outcome from you, as he likely does with others. I doubt he really cared what the long term results of lying to you were, because he seems to have only cared about getting the type of attention he wanted on the short run. It’s quite sick, and I’m sorry it happened to you. There are genuine guys online too though. My wife and I found each other online and we didn’t lie to each other at all. You just got an asshole this time. Lies to his wife, lies to his mistress, lies to you, and lies to himself because he doesn’t care about anyone but his immediate present self.

[NathanDavis]

I guess that if he had told you his older, real age... maybe you would be wondering or inquiring about more serious relationships like being married or engaged for example? which could lead to the facts that he was trying to hide, so I guess that's why he said he was younger.

[Brainsbeforebeauty]

Sometimes people just lie without even a valid reason... Or maybe he thought you'd think he was too old for you... The why still doesn't excuse the lies. Even if you say you could forgive the lying about divorce, he lied about more than one thing to you and still didn't come clean till you told him you saw his pictures. Those are huge red flags. No I would not trust this man if I were you...

[Anonymous]

Obviously don't trust him, who knows what else he lied about.
But as far as I am concerned you are reaping your just deserts, you spend your youth turning down decent guys that came your way and now guys like this is what you can look forward to. ducunt volentem fata, nolentem trahunt

[KatherineJ]

You are better off forgetting him and moving on.

[Iron_Man]

He Is already a cheater get rid of him