Did I mess up by saying this?

[pink_and_inlove]

Me and my boyfriend were texting and I said “I don't understand why going out to eat together once a week is such a big deal when people where i work go out to eat practically everyday 😂 In the future I won't always have to pay though right? I love you too honey boo 💘💘tell me how your exam goes” then he replied with “Oh come on babe you're acting like I never pay for food. It's fine, I'm okay.. I honestly don't really feel like going out on Saturday If you want to go there anyway I'll drive us there, but I'm honestly not in the mood to eat out” the truth is that I’m always paying he’s mostly only paid for special events like Valentine’s Day and our anniversary so just a few times mostly but majority of the time it’s just been me paying it honestly bothers me a bit and I wonder if it’s a red flag but I honestly don’t let it get to me. I know that I’m the one that has the full time job but I feel like maybe he could make more of an effort? It really is mostly me paying. He does technically have a job but he only works when he wants to that’s how his job works we’re both college students but I’m the one with a full time job. I also understand him not wanting to go out it’s just a bit of a bummer especially because I told him that I feel sad when I don’t go out once a week since all I do is work and then go to my room I was also really excited for us to go to the place but I understand it’s just a bit of a bummer/ a bit lame.

Updates

+1 y

It sucks because I wanted someone to try different foods with and I wanted that someone to be my boyfriend but now I have no one :(

[jennifer_bloom]

This guy does sound like a red flag and I believe you can find a guy who treats you better than this, even if a guy does not want to pay for you, he should not expect you to pay for him unless you are effortlessly rich, you have a pretty face and I believe you can find a more generous guy, this guy sounds selfish.

[Gwenhwyfar]

This is not good! I thought he was like the perfect boyfriend but he’s being really cheap with you and it’s not acceptable. He’s supposed to love you and romance you and do anything for you.

[pink_and_inlove]

He drives me to work everyday. I’m glad I’m not overreacting by feeling bummed out

[Gwenhwyfar]

You’re not

[pink_and_inlove]

He always treats me well and is super sweet he gives me driving lessons too and I pay him for gas for taking me to work. He’s always really sweet to me but this is the only problem that I see so far me having to pay most of the time. It’s even more worrisome that my grandmothers ex husband and her split up because he didn’t want to work or anything I hope this doesn’t get worse overtime like my mom said it would

[Gwenhwyfar]

It is getting troubling. And I like him overall.

[pink_and_inlove]

He wakes up at 5 am every morning to take me to work though. Is me paying most of the time still a red flag? how would you react? I know that everyone has a flaw

[Gwenhwyfar]

It’s getting to be kind of a red flag but you need to decide for yourself how important it is

[pink_and_inlove]

I’m not sure what to do

[pink_and_inlove]

I don’t want a guy to be cheap with me but at the same time I am not a high maintenance girl. Also my grandma telling me about her ex husband not wanting to work kind of worries me if the same thing happens to me and my mom saying that he’ll just get worse overtime

[Gwenhwyfar]

I think you should tell him it really bothers you having to pay all the time.

[pink_and_inlove]

When I was at his house he wanted me to order my own food through doordash then I joked around calling him a cheep ass but I wasn’t really joking lol

[pink_and_inlove]

Even if he doesn’t work?

[pink_and_inlove]

And I invite him to those places?

[Gwenhwyfar]

You need to have a talk with him!!! This is not acceptable. You’re a pretty girl with a lot of good qualities. You don’t need to be supporting a dead weight.

[Gwenhwyfar]

You guys should split paying. Not fair for you to be paying for him all the time.

[pink_and_inlove]

I just texted him “baby I do pay most of the time” because he said that I was acting like he didn’t pay

[Gwenhwyfar]

Good

[Jjpayne]

I think it's fair to want to stay in but maybe ordering something from GrubHub. And I totally think it's fair to buy something using that. If you have to make a statement I suppose you could get your own GrubHub while you both stay in but see what he proposes 🤔 maybe his idea for food is not bad..

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I think that no girl should have to pay for eating out dates
when my last girlfriend stayed over I paid for me and her
to eat out at our local restaurant and it made her happy
and made me happy

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Thanks For MHO :)

[Anonymous]

No , I can’t believe he has a girlfriend that pays for his nights out 😂

he is either super broke which isn’t actually surprising for a college student or he really is taking advantage here and you’re being suckered.

[loves2learn]

Awwww. Try making food together instead. You don’t have to go out. I don’t think what you said was wrong. ❤️

[Needtovent]

Don’t be the one who almost always pays. He’s telling you he doesn’t want to go out probably because he feels bad that this is the case. Do something he can afford to pay for

[COMMODOREII]

He sounds like a home body.

[pink_and_inlove]

I’m a homebody too I only like to go out to eat or something once a week lol

[pink_and_inlove]

I’m the kind of person that always stays home I just like trying different foods and stuff and I really want someone to try foreign foods with me

[pink_and_inlove]

We’re both introverts

[bannacookies]

He thinks of you as Mama Money bags I think.