I feel you, been there. Look, I feel there is no wasted time, have you heard Steve Jobs connecting the dots speech? Do listen. Be careful, sometimes people make us like them. Like anger and resentment builds up, and sometimes want to hurt others like this. Please dont, still be a good human. You might feel that you are naive and everyone cheats and then you'll think "Why not I do it?" Dont give in. You might think its so unfair. Trust me, if you're kind and good at heart, things will fall in place. The puzzles will merge. I try to go by the principle "Do the right thing", but I learnt it after being cheated and then hurting someone. Its not worth it trust me.
Be a good person, and trust me the universe will conspire to always bring back good to you.
Meanwhile, someone has cheated, okay. You might have experienced new emotions, new depths of negativities. Note them. Its important, you dont fall in a deep pit everyday. The pit is also a part of you. Learn from what you saw within yourself there.
Regarding the person, please dont hate them, they dont deserve any emotion at all, not even hate. No energy of yours to be wasted there, just poof them out eventually. Just remember what you learnt.
If pain is too much, please talk to someone. Cry with someone, it will do a small amount of healing.
Sending positivity and hugs your way. you'll make it out of this stronger, and as a better human, just dont give in to negativity.
Most Helpful Opinions
1. People don't know themselves, are inexperienced and don't know what they want. They may think they do but most times they don't.
2. People can't control themselves and are acting on a whim causing mistakes to happen that could have been avoided.
3. Emotions and superficialities cloud peoples judgement, when these things eventually subside they MIGHT realize they don't like the person as much as the shell yet they are too comfortable or too afraid to end it.
4. They might do it because they think they can get away with it.
Because some people are assholes that are inconsiderate of others emotions, time, and feelings. That's the simplified answer.
I mean there are a plethora of reasons people cheat: from psychological aspects to... well they just do it because they think they can get away with it without thinking of the impact it has on others [they're selfish].
I'm not even going to further justify why some people cheat, or make excuses for people that waste your time when it comes to dating because honestly? There is no excuse for said behavior. People like that make me sick too.
It shouldn't be hard to say to someone if you're no longer interested in them, or you want to move on. All you're doing is hurting said person in the long run and wasting their time they could be spending with someone that DOES want to be with them.
Because they are selfish and don't understand the meaning of loyalty or commitment or could care less or maybe not even know how to love correctly because they were never shown. Could be several answers to this question
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--------------Simply because they are bad people in this world. Sometimes we need to vet people a little better before giving them a chance to waste our time. Most people show who they really are in the very beginning. It's up to us to recognize the red flags and move on.
"The moment that you feel that you deserve better, YOU DO."
~Coach T Anthony @thedatecoach IG- u
Cheaters are very self-absorbed people. Why would you expect them to have concern for your feelings?
I think people have different reasons for cheating. I wouldn't really consider it a waste if time. The way I see or is if they cheat then it is clear their focus is on someone else or maybe they want a polygamous relationship. Since I personally value loyalty I end the relationship immediately once I learn someone was not loyal and move forward because for me the time we spent still happened but they chose to not be loyal so then I think it is important to uphold your value of loyalty and let them find their definition of loyalty elsewhere.
Probably the attractiveness of a taboo as a basis.
Even taking your eyes or attention off of someone for a second they could perceive as cheating/lack of interest or thinking about/preferring someone else.
Cheating in the physical is silly; emotional too, but for that you have to be very comfortable with yourself (to not get attached to anyone else - not just physically, but emotionally). I think it is possible - how much of it is the other people affecting you as a couple - I am trying to figure out.I think there are many different reasons people cheat but the main ones I think about are- one, they never really truly committed and don't care. Two, there is something they are not getting in the relationship that they are trying to fulfill by cheating. And it may not even be physical it can be something simple like feeling sexy or wanted. Three, they are bored. This is a sad one to admit but if there is no excitement in your relationship and you have fallen into the same mundane pattern the cheating is less about being with someone else and more about the excitement the secret brings.
There are people who just cheat all the time. Then there are people who only cheat because you don't have boundaries and they know they can get away with it but they wouldn't cheat on someone who doesn't take any nonsense.
Best thing is to have standards & boundaries and not give 1 inch on any of them. Dump a guy on day 1 if he shows any signs of crossing a boundary.Because society prioritize their own happiness over everything else including what’s best for them. Look at obesity in the states, gaming for 12 hrs a day, rate of unprotected sex…
The only way to fix this is to make sex outside marriage shameful again and promote marriage and remove divorce as an option… either that or take away matrimony and monogamy altogether.Because they are immature, they lack sympathy for others, they want to hurt others because they have or are hurting in life. I understand cheating classifies as being in a relationship with someone and you cheat on someone else. But as a guy, if a girl is dating multiple guys at once and telling one guy she really likes him but breaks his heart by ditching him I would constitute that as cheating as well. A girl should never commit to dating another guy if she's just fooling around and sending mixed messages. I'm not being a female hater, I'm just saying girls have more options with the opposite sex, a guy who likely cheats all the time is usually a guy who know's he's the shit and hot and wants to have "fun". I don't respect the dating game today because people act however they want both girls and guys.
selfishness. they can just as easily tell you that they dont want anything serious - and you can decide if you want to participate in that -- at least that would be honest.
sometimes people want to play things safe - have you at home while they shop around for a better deal? For a new deal?I find it has a lot to do with the fact the "chester" doesn't know what or who they really want but are too avoidant to admit it. Also they're afraid of being alone or possibly not finding a better option and end up missing out on the current person who may be good enough. Also fear of the confrontation of hurting feelings.
I think they just started relationship for fun.. just to see that is it worth it or not and sometimes people date each other for "Sexual Desires" .
And in both cases... ending up in cheating...They care more about themselves than hurting you. In most cases that I know of, it's that all they want is to have romantic relationships with many people, but don't have the guts to tell you that's what you're signing up for, because you might say no.
My ex I found outxwas a big time cheater. She had cheated on many people and multiple husband's. Turns out it was with the same POS that she married a couple months after divorce. I also found out that she is extremely narcissistic and self absorbed. She hid everything for a long time, but things eventually came out. She was just a complete waste of time and effort.
Because something is lacking in their other relationship and they think you can fulfill what is lacking.
Cuz they are selfish. And only think about themselves. And they won't ever learn. So it's better u find out now then after investing 10 years of your life then finding out. I know it sucks. But you'll be ok.
Yea ever heard the saying “cheaters never prosper”? That’s a lie.
It’s how the game today is played.
Cheat or get cheated on.The best answer you could ever find: because they’re stupid.
Literally that’s the answer.people who cheat almost half of the time have low self esteem, half of the time it’s not even about you but themselves.
They do it for many reasons to get back at you or cause they don’t care
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