For you, do opposite attract?

Question

Or you prefer someone more like yourself?

InventorofWarp · Accepted Answer

I definitely think that when I loook back on my history so far I have definitely been attracted to women who are (I like to think) as kind as I am and warm and nurturing, compassionate and caring.
Even some of the worst exes and harshest women I've had things with did things that were incredibly kind to me that endeared me to them only for things to eventually become clearer later on.
Case in point: My two worst relationships; Emily and Jen: Emily once got me a star wars helmet for my motorcycle which I actually still have sitting around somewhere in my storage, I like the helmet. 21st birthday gift. One of the nicest gifts I've ever gotten. Jen once took care of me when I had my first hangover and even made me breakfast and stuff the next day. Really cute and kind and warm. She also got me new shoes, a couple shirts and yoga pants at different intervals, the shoes were a Christmas gift for 2019. I still have all except the shoes as well. Yes I'm that kind of guy who keeps gifts from his exes. I also have a watch that one girl, Rae, gave me. I like the shirts and I use the yoga pants as workout pants since I only ever did yoga with her (tbh I really wanted to fuck her but more than that, I thought I could be the white shining knight who turned her away from casual hookups and convinced her that there are good men who can still try to be the awesome boyfriend for women but, I was young and naive and stupid, she was older and jaded).
Also the women I've tended to be attracted to are also kind of badass in a lotta ways, also not unlike me (I'm an avid hunter and take karate lessons). Case in point, most of them workout (as do I), tend to know their way around a gun or can at least handle themselves with some judo. Pretty damn sexy.
And ideally they have tattoos like me, though to my extent is not necessary.

MCheetah · Accepted Answer

No. Opposites attract only work for magnets. For most people, they're going to want someone who is the same kind of person as them mentally, and maybe only the opposite height as far as dating the opposite gender (tall guy, short girl). But generally, hot people get with hot people, white people with white, black people with black, older with older, young with young, etc.

If that wasn't the case, then THIS would be my "dream woman" (shudders).

Potatofacebarbie · Accepted Answer

The phrase itself is too vague. I dont think we can say that opposites attract or that they dont bc it depends on what we are talking about specifically. For example i think an introvert and an extrovert are a good match, but an introvert and an introvert are not. However i feel like an extrovert and an extrovert could work. But someone with high emotional intelligence should probably be with someone who also has high emotional intelligence. People who are more deep should be with deep people and people who dont care about being deep should be with people who also dont care about being deep. Someone who wants to have kids should be with someone who wants to have kids. But someone who is indecisive should probably be with someone decisive. Anyway it varies.

Mollynotgemma · Accepted Answer

Opposites attract for the initial excitement…. But to be similar leads to longevity in a relationship. My partner and I were convinced we were the same… and hesitated to embark on our relationship. Since then our similarities are so different to what we thought. We have experienced the same things… yet see how different we have reacted/handled/lived through them. So we are opposites of the same experiences! So yes opposites attract just as much as seeing the same things differently

Account · Answer

I am usually into people who remind me or myself and they usually happen to be into me as well. So in my case, no.

LindsayR07 · Answer

I am a big proponent of personality tests. I know that, despite people perceiving me as a bit random or as someone who might be a little unpredictable, I am incredibly predictable if 1) you know me and 2) you have all of the information... and so is pretty much everyone else if you know their personality type and the variables factoring into their decisions. To that end, people rarely surprise me in and of themselves (really takes some excitement out of life).

As a result, I am generally attracted to people like myself (Native American, straight brown hair, brown eyes, athletic, IQ of 125+, and ENFP (I have found INFP acceptable as well) because I am comfortable with them and they are a constant.

Opposites excite me, but don't attract me.

kristine_o · Answer

I prefer someone, with a good mix of both. Someone similar whom I can relate to and have the same values as I do. But someone different so that we can both grow and mature together. - someone that could complement my personality. I'm stubborn. I wouldn't want to date someone that is equally as stubborn or else we'll both get into fights... I'm direct and I would expect my partner to be able to have an open conversation as well whenever we get into disagreement rather than to bottle things up.

exitseven · Answer

My wife and I are like the proverbial two peas in a pod. We are that sickening couple that finished each other's sentences. When we met we were amazed at how much alike we were. We knew after the third date we would eventually get married.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

I prefer similar (I'm a nerd and I need a nerd to really understand and appreciate me), but I would like her to be different enough that she is unique and not just a copy of me (I need some one who is going to show me things I would not normally see, throw out ideas I would not come up with on my own etc.).

sage2021 · Answer

I am with a guy now that totally gets me, because he took the time to get to know me. We can make each other laugh every day. A sense of humor has to be a big part of our relationship. Intellectual stimulation is necessary as well. When you take time to really get to know each other, then you have each other's back. Opposites do not attract at all in my opinion.

Titanya · Answer

Not generally no. I guess it depends on what they are opposite in.

Chores, hobbies, values, jobs etc

For example, if they don't clean or pick up after themselves in the way that I'd like them to then that might be an issue, but if they like video games and alcohol I may be able to tolerate that or it wouldn't bother me... Same for opposing values

ArztSchlachthof · Answer

In terms of romance - I'm definitely not into introverts without any ambition, confidence, passion and a sense of humour (the opposite of me). I'm very "lively", always laughing when I'm not onto something, dancing and singing our songs, do not fear talking to people when it's needed or they appear as a great fun material and so on ;) Just realising - I must look like a weird egoist to those people, but my gigantic group of friends love me as much as I love them, so what of it, hah!

In terms of a less romantic attraction (a friend material) - I don't care at all. They could be nihilists, puritans et cetera but as long as we feel good with each other, can work or have fun, it doesn't matter.

TheLawAroundHere · Answer

Opposite. Similar. Diametrically opposed. Cut from the same cloth.

You can be any of these things with your mate. But...

YOU MUST BE COMPATIBLE!!!

there's a difference between similar and compatible. You dont habe to be different of the same. You MUST get along.

johnsmithjs · Answer

Opposites attract they just do not make good partners. I find a lot of woman attractive but there is no way in hell I am going to seriously date someone that does not hold the same political, social, religious, and financial values that I have. Hook-ups are a different matter, it can be fun and exciting to tumble in the hay with someone that is completely opposite. I have always wondered what it would be like to have sex with a goth woman or a hippy woman.

Medhat-M · Answer

Actually yeah.. I'm a shy and very introverted type of person... almost all the girls i attract are extroverts, social, bold, bubbly.. Not gonna lie.. It's oddly exciting... it's like someone you wouldn't normally roll with... but they're coming out of their way and into you.. You feel like an exception which can be a big deal in attraction...

Mofunfour20 · Answer

Yes because strong, hardworking men want soft peaceful women to make them forget how chaotic the world is. A masculine man and a masculine or alpha woman won't ever have a good relationship because there has to be a leader in every relationship

BCA6010 · Answer

Someone too similar is boring, someone too different is incompatible. Ideally, someone more in-between where we share several interests and ideals but not all.

Puppystarfish23 · Answer

Is that's Damiano David from maneskin fiancé in the top picture?

Jemini_Crocket · Answer

Yes, I am attracted to someone who's more extroverted and more confident than me but I honestly doubt a man like could be into a woman who's his opposite.

SpiderManFan2002 · Answer

I feel like he shouldn’t be too different but not too similar either- there has to be some kind of balance between differences and similarities between us.

maybaby101 · Answer

yes, personally I am attracted to a man with a slightly opposite personality than me. I'm a bit crazy so to speak, short tempered, can get hot headed, I'm loud and extroverted and tend not to think before I act/speak, so I like a guy who can calm me down, who has a lot of patience and who understands that sometimes it's hard for me to control my temper. basically, a softie who knows how to handle me lol~

ZackBan · Answer

I want my girl to have the qualities that I aspire to have in myself so that she can influence me to change as we spend time together, of course I'll be influencing her too but you get the picture

dhinchak · Answer

Yeah, I do prefer people like myself. I don't think an opposite-natured person would be able to get me.

FreyaRed · Answer

On emotional level the answer is no. In terms of mindset and physical masculinity/femininity the answer is yes.

kinggeorge007 · Answer

For me it's not the opposite attracts, they have to complete me like they have to be similar but be the complement of me. They should be able to drag me with them to a better life and vice versa.

certifiedalphafemale · Answer

I think opposites do attract. My boyfriend is the shy one but sweet, and I’m the social butterfly who’s independent. At first, I got annoyed by his social awkwardness, but in the long run, I started to fall in love with him! ❤️

Xoirwinkan · Answer

Yes and no. Female is opposite of male. I find Asians sexy as a white guy. I like a friendly bubbly girl to contrast my almost antisocial personality. But regarding important things like religion and politics, ABSOLUTELY NOT.

harmseygracelu · Answer

Yeah. I'm a bit shy and I tend to get super out-going, funny, class-clown sort of guys.

jason_1233 · Answer

I can't really stand Someone who is exactly opposite to me. I prefer us to have something in common but be unique in our own ways.

tatianamay · Answer

I’ve been known to attract players and I’m the “good girl” as you’d have guessed by now.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Yes! I've always attracted my opposites. It seems to make things easier and it makes my relationships more satisfying and interesting.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm a slut and want a good guy, so I think opposites 😌

Marhaban-1 · Answer

I personally prefer somewhere in the middle for that one

Starwitch23 · Answer

Well, compatibility matters in a relationship. You can be polar opposite of each other yet emotionally you both are compatible.

RichardCranium6201 · Answer

Hell no. I couldn't and wouldn't put up with someone just like me.

Alexandrubaschet08 · Answer

I alwase go for the osloside one. I hate when i finde similaritys.

IveGotNoName · Answer

My boyfriend and I are pretty similar... so I'll have to say no, not for me

Anonymous · Answer

Some opposite, some same. I like learning and experiencing news things so that kind of opposite is good.

SupremeWarlord · Answer

Not the polar opposite, but it's good to have someone a bit different, in order to add new experiences to my short life.

Shiningtempest · Answer

@jean-marie_celine I believe opposites never attract because of incompatible goals & values. Thus dating between two incompatible people is doomed to fail.

Anonymous · Answer

They DO attract BUT do they last?

ChubbyKing · Answer

Definitely would prefer someone who's more similar to me

pleasestopthis · Answer

Not really, I prefer guys who share similar characteristics, at least in important matters

Massageman · Answer

I'm a saver (of stuff), my wife is a tosser-outer - does that count?

douride2 · Answer

No. I usually date someone with similar interests to mine.

hellacray · Answer

Lol no.  I just don't see how we could get along if we're the opposite of each other.

Feelicks · Answer

I like to bring people into my life with characteristics I would like to rub off on me.

Nick473 · Answer

I want someone like me. Something deep inside me doesn't connect with most people and i need that if im gonna be with them.

mexicansenor · Answer

Personality I like the same but looks I like The opposite

Jlegacy · Answer

I once wanted someone dark because I was light but dark is just dark. Thank God for the light that owns my soul and I'd go into the dark for her, anytime.

Poppykate · Answer

I personally don’t get that ‘strong connection’ for a lot of people. I guess it’s the ability to talk openly, and share without judgement. 🤔

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, I seem to attract women in to art and weed, when I'm technical and hate smoking... No, I like women with similar interests to mine, more

FamilyGuy2020 · Answer

My wife, was a hobb knobb actress and I was nothing more than a Marine in Afghanistan

Omario2049 · Answer

Is that second one a Hippie and an Officer? I've NEVER seen that combo before🤯

Pulseofsulfur · Answer

I would rather have date someone who is similar to me so that they understand me better than someone who doesn't like the things I like

lovetowatch · Answer

not really but being to much alike does not work either

mattclark242 · Answer

kinda yes and no if they show you something in a new way than yes but if they do not have the same goals than no. 50% opposite yes. 100% no

Slim57 · Answer

Opposites attract but so far its never worked out on the long run for me

tanvishah · Answer

I won't go for someone completely opposite. I would prefer to have some common grounds.

Abdulwahh · Answer

Personality wise not exactly we tend to like similar people

Asianguy123 · Answer

Similar things attracted too like hobbies, hair colors, skills, talents etc

Phoenix98 · Answer

Similar where it matters but unique in her own way.

Somegirl408 · Answer

i want someone like myself in terms of personality

Babygirl_S · Answer

I am always attracted to bad guys who don't look innocent at all and I have been told that I look innocent so yes.

For you, do opposite attract?

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For you, do opposite attract?

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