How do I get closer to an introverted guy?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I'm pretty introverted and spend a lot of time alone, so I might be able to provide you with a useful answer. Although dating is actually the one area where I am more open about myself, at least if the girl seems genuine. In a romantic relationship I wouldn't want to spend much time alone because I would really like to have a close relationship where we are honest about things and spend a lot of time together. I am reserved and guarded around everyone else though. However, I think there are probably a decent number of guys who keep to themselves and are more reserved even with significant others. The best way to get close to an introverted guy is to let him know that you want to get to know him and will not judge him for his interests or hobbies. Introverted people often prefer to be alone because we feel like most people don't understand us and we are concerned that people might try to take advantage of our kindness. We tend to avoid people because we are tired of being judged for our different opinions, personality traits, and interests. Show him that you genuinely care about his interests or opinions and be willing to listen to what he has to say. If he sees that you want to get close to him because you care about him as a person, he will start to trust you. Take him seriously, listen to what he has to say, talk about his interests, learn about his likes and dislikes, and do not judge him for the things he enjoys. If you can prove to him that you are trustworthy, he will start to feel like he can be himself around you and will eventually be open about his thoughts.

ShadezMcgee · Accepted Answer

1.) Patience
2.) Don't put every bit of conversation expectation on him. Initiate and try to learn more about him.
3.) Be upfront and authentic
4.) Don't expect him to enjoy doing things in loud or extroverted environments that much if at all
5.) Don't be shallow/materialistic
6.) Trust needs to be built to open them up

jennifer_bloom · Answer

Be kind and show sympathy when he is unhappy - once he views you as a touch of kindness - he will go out of his way to find you when he is stressed out

unusuak · Answer

Im going to speak on this because im introverted as they come and I've read all the comments about doing stuff we like and all that bullshit. Look if you really are interested in an introvert its easy. Come as you are. If your not i would know it before you ever even noticed that i noticed you. Its a comfort level thing. Dont try at all just be you. Be comfortable with xanax. Be a cuddler. Be ready to most likely be with the most faithful dude u have ever known and if you can become his best friend u guys will work. Make sure you have the party stage out of ur system. Tell your friends not to be cunts to him because he's totaly cool being in a room alone with his own thoughts so he really doesn't care at all for opinions of others in regards to him as a person. If your ever in public together and he looks like that vampire from twilight thats in pain, its because he is. He will most likely be the kind of dude that will do anything for the few friends he has. He would burn the world for you.

horatiohornblower · Answer

Walk up to them calmly. They can smell fear. Let them smell your hand first. Keep it closed in a fist. In case they bite. After they smell your hand. If they look relaxed or start licking your hand. You can scratch them behind the ear... Wait. I'm thinking about dogs.

Just talk to us. We're just people. You'll probably need to do more of the talking as introverts generally listen more and are content to be quiet. Ask about interest and talk about yours.

If the introvert is also a shy guy. Not all introverts are shy. Then you'll likely need to make a lot of the first moves. Plus make clear what you want. As they may not pick up on your hints and flirts. No matter how obvious they are.

Mahalia827 · Answer

I'm female and an introvert. Most introverts don't like to interact face to face unless they are close with the person. So to get closer to them just little by little each day just show friendly gestures and talk to them when they seem more comfortable in your presence. Once they are more comfortable ask them for a social media you can talk them on to keep in contact. Introverts are very talkative through text. Text them for a week or two until they are comfortable enough around you and ask to meet up somewhere. I'm not sure how well this will work but it's all I can suggest.

Lockey_ · Answer

One way might be to just get him used to you. If you just say "morning" to him a few times, he will get used to it. If you then go to the next level and say "Morning John", he will think about what he could reply.
Some more context could be helpful here :D

bredtaleth · Answer

The same way you do any guy; get to know him, show interest, have welcoming body language. If you're asking what you need to be aware of, I would say that you should just keep in mind not to overload him. That is, introverts sometimes have limited social energy, so constantly initiating conversations, coming on too strong and too fast, being very demanding will probably scare him away. Give him and space time, and let him open up to you slowly.

LegendaryIcon · Answer

introverts, are shy. think of them as a turtle. turtles shells, are basically their homes, so, when they come out of it, they're likely eating, or something else. if you can get them out of their "home", they're likely going to open up.

it often helps to be the confident one as the girl, i know but, he's a shy person (guy). with me, and yes, im pretty shy, if a girl likes me, or at least wants to get to know me, whether she "likes me" or not, i need to feel comfortable around her, so the more comfortable she is with me, the more comfortable ill be with her, and i can get more stuff out. whatever makes you feel comfortable with a man, show him. he'll likely be looking it up at home "is she comfortable around me, can i open up to her", like we do here on gag

Anonymous · Answer

From my experience being an introvert I would say dont put too much pressure on them if they're really quiet and not talking as much. I've been told on dates "you barely talk, I'm always the one talking" and I would take it personal as if im boring and it shuts me down and makes me not talk as much.

Heartache0405 · Answer

Find a way to get his #, his snapchat, his Facebook, instagram, whatever, and talk via text. Build a connection that way first until he feels comfortable enough to talk in person. Maybe meet with a group of friends (one or two of his and one or two of yours) and hang out together. He'll probably start to open up. Take it from a lifelong introverted loner.

slatyb · Answer

Are you already talking? If not, just say hello. It works wonders. If you are, then invite him to lunch or whatever. He may be introverted, or he may just feel unlikable so he avoids giving people a chance to not like him. Sometimes people feel that way if they were raised by neglecting parents. My wife and I both felt that way in our twenties. Her mother was physically present but withdrawn, and my father was the same.

GeoCrusher · Answer

talk about his hobbies with him, even introverted people get into it when its about something they enjoy or are passionate about, ask him what he likes and tell him to tell you about that. If he perceives the closeness as teasing, assure him by dropping a hint in passing talk about you being single or available.

kenz000 · Answer

Help him out a bit. Spend time with him and ask about him. Find out what he likes to do. Go do those things with him since he is already comfortable with them.

summiter · Answer

Start by asking him questions about himself. Like "what did you like most when growing up" . What us your favorite hobby? etc. Has he had previous girlfriends? Maybe he is new to dating and is a nervous virgin? Your thoughts?

Vikkrram · Answer

Being an introvert guy one thing i can tell you for sure that u don't have to be someone whom u not are and dealing wid an introvert requires some mooves first from ur side.

And i have loosen my 2 love before. This was heartbreaking.

Twalli · Answer

Find out his interests and if you share some talk to him one on one about it. Introverts are not opposed to being with a small number of people, we avoid large groups.

Nazgol · Answer

Try to familiarize yourself with his interests/hobbies and show interest or ask to join him in his favorite hangouts

RobT312 · Answer

i can be pretty introverted until i get to know you. then im the opposite of an introvert! so just be a little patient and get to know him

JohnGarcia · Answer

Some introverts feel thigs intensely, so be careful with what you say. Don’t put him in the spot, and always accept him for who he is!

Anonymous · Answer

Ask him to go for a walk together and then hold his hand.

TexasRed95 · Answer

Be very open with him and be the one to initiate conversation.

WowwGirl · Answer

I hit on and kept bothering my introvert until he eventually gave up fighting my charm.

Mangospacho · Answer

Lock him in a room together and tell him you won’t let him out unless he has a 10-minute conversation with you. That way, you’ll get to know him better and you will be the hero for setting him free.

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

You just have to talk to us. Ask us some questions. Get us to open up a little bit

IHateBeingaMan · Answer

why don't you make the first move or ask him out? or are you stubborn and adamant like that majority of women are?

Ryfyle · Answer

Why the fuck would you want to do that? You end up wanting Chad anyway, why waste your time with a beta introvert.

TheFlak38 · Answer

this is the woman who preys on emotionally available men in order to destroy their lives with her irrational demands.

Dnice1 · Answer

Spend time alone with him. Maybe do things that he likes.

Hulk30 · Answer

tailor yourself to his nature and accept it but also let him know what kinda relationship ya want with him

EnglishEuropean · Answer

If you really think a boring guy is worth your time you need to take the initiative, be proactive.

OddBeMe · Answer

My wife says: 1) no drama at first 2) don’t be superficial 3) take it slow

MCheetah · Answer

Be nice and talk to him politely.

Bdsmaster · Answer

Approach him and talk to him luv that might work for you.

Tstrbrainer · Answer

I'm one and it's tricky.  If you want it, you should make a move first

Julious0202 · Answer

I tried to act naturally with him

andy530 · Answer

Ask him questions, be curious

007kingifrit · Answer

men respond to touch. be physical with him

noohair · Answer

Does he drink coffee? Ask him.

MJtheCoach · Answer

You goanna be miserable

hahahmm · Answer

Don't be a whore.

Iron_Man · Answer

Do all the work

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