Why don't more women make the first move?

Question

We live in an age where we are equal right? So why don't more women approach men instead of the other way around?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

They like the spirit of that idea at first, but once they try it once, twice, thrice, and it doesn't go their way they give up on the whole equality mess fast. They'll of course pay lip service to it but also qualify themselves: "I respect any girl who wants to do it, but it's just not for me". They very quickly find that it's much easier on them to indulge in the same status quo they initially like the idea of breaking out of and make such excuses for themselves. No matter what you look at, I think you'll find that any notion of "equality" applied to it only extend up to the point of what women want to do. If something is disadvantageous to them then it's "unfair" and they cry equality, and if it's advantageous to them then it's "their preference" and questioning that is to question equality.

Fireguy17 · Accepted Answer

I lived in California for a while years ago, and I was at a club just enjoying the music, smiling and kind of bouncing to the music, and I was getting asked to dance all the time.
At first I didn't know what to make of it, it was really great, so I asked one of the women why she came up to me and she told me it looked like I was having fun.
She said that most of the guys were just trying to look cool, striking the right pose, while I looked like I was having fun.
I told her I was frome midwest and that is how I normally was.
It would be nice if more women did that, then they would have to take the chance of being rejected.

SueShe · Accepted Answer

Because women in general tend not to be as desperate as men are when it comes to listening to their sexual hormones.

Being slaves of their testosterone is mostly a guy thing and not so much a women's. The reason is that we are fully aware that we bear all risks.

That would include

1. risk of being seen as desperate
2. risk of being called a hoe
3. risk of being misinterpreted
4. risk of sexual abuse

Those would be the 4 major reasons why women are not not doing the first move. We are able to fully control our libido whereas guys are not really capable of it.

silvermoon84 · Accepted Answer

Because of old social stigmas and outdated dating advice that we were raised with. I remember being 13 years old and having my 67 year old grandmother telling me to never let boys I liked know that I liked them, and my mom agreed with her, yet I had no problem with boys I liked finding out that I liked them. I mean come on ladies, it’s 2021. There’s nothing wrong with letting a guy know you like him. It doesn’t mean you have to chase him, just be like “I think you’re cute, we should grab coffee sometime” (just make sure he’s single first)

AmandaYVR · Answer

This pretty much sums it up.

"I have approached maybe a couple guys and got rejected so I stopped. My ego is to fragile"
It's very honest. Don't believe many of the other justifications. This is the real answer.

Why do I never get hit on?

LikeALog · Answer

Probably fear of being considered desperate for a date or fear of being called a slut. For some fear of rejection.

Some of the times the girl made the first move, it was very casual, almost incidental.

While standing at a bar, she asked if I knew the bartender's name, I told her his name, in response she said it's nicer to call a person by name than hey, bartender. That started our conversation.

Another time I had helped a very elderly lady with a folding chair. This girl walking by said it was sweet helping the elderly lady and she thought most guys wouldn't. That started our conversation.

Much better than the Hi, you waiting for someone, you by yourself.

Anonymous · Answer

Hmmm I am making a controversial comment.

But I think that the reason is that it may be more embarrassing if the woman got rejected. Compared to a man getting rejected.

I have heard nasty things when girls make the first move. Such as desperate. But if a guy makes the first move I seldom hear them being described as desperate. Unless they make moves on many girls in a short span of time.

And also, if the woman knows she is attractive, she doesn’t need to make the first move. Men will gravitate towards her naturally.

average looking girls knows how average they are and their chances aren’t as good as the attractive ones. So they are not likely to make a first move because there is a low chance of success.

PrettyPriya · Answer

If it is of any value, I asked my current SO out. I don't know why more girls wait for the guy.  All that does is create a risk of missing out on a truly special person, should he never ask them out.

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

I have made a lot of first moves and somehow it makes people think I'm easy or something is wrong with me.

A lot depends on personality and how well someone takes rejection, I take it well. If a guy isn't interested, no problem. I move on, I hope decent guys are the same way.

People get tired of being rejected or fearful about stuff if its someone at school or work where it could come back.

Still I won't stop making first moves, I've had more success than failures though.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

They do and always have done. it’s been a thing since I was at school. If you are not getting approached, then have a look at yourself. it’s fairly common.

Somegirl678 · Answer

i would only if the guy shows he likes me, so many times i look at guys but they just look back with a blank expression so whats the point. i give up

paradiseonearth93 · Answer

I don't know they’re boring. I love making the first move.

MCheetah · Answer

Entitlement, cowardice, laziness, or a mix of those three.

sufys12 · Answer

Equal rights has nothing to do with approaching people. Rather silly to think women and men would behave similarly just because of equal rights... They are inherently different.

CandaceSims201 · Answer

I did tried to made a first move by writing letter by a guy that er are like but got rejected.

Hellraiser1984 · Answer

I wish they would. It's very rough for guys today. You say hello here comes the mace. I don't approach them for fear of a seriously vicious rejection.

ChiPaPa · Answer

Because they don't have to. Imagine, having people approach you and then being asked why you don't approach.

Anonymous · Answer

I actually like making the first move, then I'm sure there isn't a motive. We have to be careful as women. Men call cops when you make a move

Anonymous · Answer

Because it is usually a waste of time or simply too risky.

Shawn411 · Answer

Because shilverys not dead yet that's the question 🤔

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

Its because men are expected to lead. For worse or for better.

Anonymous · Answer

I think it's a combination of cowardice and entitlement.

Anonymous · Answer

Human nature is meant to be cruel that way

Anonymous · Answer

Well said. That should happen.

Sketti2021 · Answer

They do

Why don't more women make the first move?

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