What are some green flags you look for before dating or in a relationship?

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

What are some green flags you look for?
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✅ “Green flags” are positive things in a person or in a relationship, such as; respectful of boundaries, has similar goals, trust between each other, open communication, can resolve conflict, consistency, etc.
❌ “Red flags” are negative things in a person or in a relationship, such as; inconsistency, lack of communication, lack of trust, controlling, manipulative, lies, extreme jealousy, etc.

[Anonymous]

I want to be with the relationship guy. I do not want to be with someone who has had many one night stands. Because i am not like that and it will scare me of being cheated. Of course this does not mean that the guy who had just relationship sex will not cheat me but i will be more secure in that relationship. I want someone who is caring and trustworthy it is not easy to understand but i will look his attitudes to understand if He is trustworthy or not. And i like if he has the sense of humour and we can laugh the same things. It makes me more connected to someone. Open communication is also important both for me and for him. We must say what we want to say openly and be direct in the relationship. So we can avoid more conflicts. Respect is important too if you love someone you must respect him\her if He does not respect to me it would be the red flag for me.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Those are all great, I agree with you.

[Seinna]

Is not a thrill seeker
Wants family and children
Is not unambitious and passive
Responsible and well reared (capable of taking care of himself)
Trustworthy
Protective

Also - Christian and convervative

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Agreed.

[Datboi65]

1) Confident, but humble.
2) Dresses modestly.
3) Manners. (Says please and thank you, to everyone)
4) Similar values. (Is traditional, follows religion, and shares similar political views)
5) Supportive and encouraging.
6) Positive demeanor. Optimistic.
7) Has a small circle of friends that are a good influence on her.
8) Good relationship with her family.
9) Doesn't smoke or drink, with no tattoos or piercings (because that's mostly rebellious people).
10) Feminine and nurturing.

As a general rule of thumb, this is what I would look for. Communication is something that you establish once you are in a relationship, but this is what I would look for before that if I'm vetting someone.

[Datboi65]

Edit: 8 comes out as a weird sunglass emoji

[Joshua0213]

Yea agree with all of these

[mobiusforniner]

You must be a mormon dude? lol

[TruthBringer]

✔️ Dresses respectively.
✔️ Has good manners.
✔️ Is honest.
✔️ Is in tune with her femininity.
✔️ is NOT a feminist.
✔️ Is engaging in getting to know as I am.
✔️ Reciprocates interest and energy, is NOT and HAS NOT been promiscuous.
✔️ Does not drink, smoke or does drugs.
✔️ Knows how to give and receive love.
✔️ Has her own interests and hobbies.
✔️ Is bubbly
✔️ Doesn't bitch about the most trivial shit.

I'm happy to say that I have found such a girl and she is wonderful.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Congrats! Glad you found the one!

[TheSpaceGnome]

1. She likes Predatory wildlife (tigers, crocodiles, spiders, etc.) and would visit Jurassic Park, if it were actually possible.
2. She likes difficult video games.
3. She likes anime/cartoons, and sci fi, and fantasy movies.
4. She is a talented artist.
5. She is able to think outside the box.
6. She has a sense of humor that is nonsensical, silly, and lewd.
7. She is bubbly and sweet to her friends, confident in her skills and ability to achieve/learn/master things, but is shy with strangers, hates crowds and parties, and is picky about who she spends time with, and is clingy and protective of me.
8. She doesn't drink, smoke, or do other drugs.

[HighValue]

Compatible morals, compatible long term life goals, enjoys doing some of the same things I enjoy doing together, is trustworthy, has an acceptable past, and if she wears a red hat with USA on the front and a 45 of the side, she is probably compatible. :)

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I see what you’re saying! 😆

[HighValue]

Do you have one of those hats?
I heard mostly cool people wear them. :P
I would wear one, but I wear all black clothes so it wouldn't match for me, otherwise I'd be wearing one too.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I don’t own any hats! But I wear a nice belt with a buckle on the hip though. Always matches with whatever you wear 😎

[HighValue]

What if someone gave you one of those cool hats along with an appropriately matching flag, would you go to a gathering/event with them that that attire was expected?

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Absolutely, I’m already welcomed.

[HighValue]

Cool. I've never been to one, but if they have one in a couple years near me I would like to go. Maybe get a picture of me with the guy leading the speech to hang up at work.

Did your whole family go (you, siblings, parents)? Or just you?
My mom has a signed letter from him from when she wrote in years ago hanging on her wall at her house.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I never got a picture! That is would be an awesome picture to frame though. I’d love a letter too!
Me and my parents went, not my sister though… She doesn’t like big crowds like that unfortunately.

[HighValue]

If he comes to the Central Valley in CA in a couple years for a rally I'd probably go, mostly for a picture so I could hang it up in my classroom. That would be cool.

[ChrisMaster69]

I am really basic, if they have no major red flags, such as being a bigot, toxic etc then I am willing to see how it goes.

i often tend not to notice good stuff straight off.

my main green light is emotional connection.

i can have a person with tons of green flags, but no emotional connection then it ain’t going to work.

[Anonymous]

For me it’s honesty, if they can be honest with me at all times it’s a green flag for me. I can’t stand being lied too even if it’s a small lie, a lie is still a lie regardless if it is a small lie or not

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Those are great green flags, thank you for sharing

[Opinion Owner]

You’re welcome
I forgot to add the red flags for me it would be liars. My mind and my mental health are severely messed up from constantly being lied to over the years that it pushed me to the point of ending my life! so please people don’t ever lie, even more so if that someone is begging you to be honest with them, be honest with them and don’t lie because you lie might just push someone over the edge.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Totally agree with that as well. Been there, done that, not a fun feeling….
I’m sorry you went through that.

[Concordio]

Huge green flags for me in no particular order
1. Highly intelligent, able to hold deep philosophical discussion about anything
2. Can stand on their own two feet, not needing my attention all the time, not clingy
3. Beieves in God (Christian) with a strong sense of morality

[Beautyforeverybody]

They remember details about you. They are respectful to others. They give you compliments. They listen to you. They don’t rush things. And most importantly, they don’t directly want to get in your pants and they are willing to wait as long as you wish.

[coconut94]

If they don’t hate their parents and have a good family life. If they don’t trash talk their exes right away. If they are healthy. If they are open minded and easy going and lax. If they drive respectably on the road. If they try to get to know me (vs talking about themselves the entire time I’m with them). If they have at least a college degree or are financially stable. If they don’t push or pressure or move too fast.

and of course, if they can make me laugh.

[Aerissa_Jade]

Stability, better have lived on his own for a year or so... not with his parents still.

Kindness, honest and trustworthy, can discuss concerns like an adult.

That I am important to him.

[Gochogirl]

Green: He or she can describe very clearly what they want to do and have already taken steps toward that goal.

Red: Always changing the subject back to something that puts the focus on them.

[Subarugirl]

If he teats his mother well, respects boundaries, honesty, generosity, emotional maturity, drive, good work ethic, good communication skills... the list could go on an on

[mobiusforniner]

Drive? As in motivation? Or having a drivers license? Cuz many guys dont have either lol

[Subarugirl]

@mobiusforniner drive as in innate, determined urge to attain a goal or satisfy a need.

[clampfan101]

A good Christian
Similar interests
Fun to be around
Smart
Wants kids
Lovely face and hair

[clampfan101]

Is there a flag color for absolute musts? (Or absolute must nots? lol)

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

‘Absolutely musts’ flag could be blue, “Absolutely nots’ flag could be orange, lol! Go ahead and share them!

[clampfan101]

Well, I think all of my orange flags would be of no worries if my one blue flag is met. My blue flag is being a good Christian woman, which implies so many great things like kindnesses of all sorts and trying to keep a good healthy lifestyle.

[MrHopper]

They love animals, they are passionate about something productive. They smile a lot, they take care of them selves and others

[MelissaMarie9614]

Honesty, trust, loyal, caring, kind, faithful, loving, affectionate, protective, supportive, understanding, patient, a very good sense of humor, and and a great personality.

Have similar interests, won't judge me for my past or anything, Loves kids and wants kids, be there for me (and I be there for him) no matter what, loves to have fun and be adventurous, and most of all he loves me for me.

[exitseven]

I would say that she stays off the goddam phone while you are on a date.

[Cowboy6666]

For me it would be if she is kind, not rude, not racist, girly girl, loves me a lot, sexy, has few common things, rosy cheeks, open minded, doesn't judge quickly, willing to live with me, talkative with me, educated etc. :)

[cosmicallyinclined]

good conversationalist, emotionally intellectual, respects sex workers, obviously isn’t misogynistic, homophobic, racist, etc., cares about what i have to say, and bonus if they have something they’re passionate about.

[shades777]

communication by phone
on time to dates
interested in my life
bubbly and generally in a good mood to talk to me

[animesenpai]

At this point show any interest at all is my ownlt green flag

[EaterPeter]

What green flags? Wait there are green flags? How come nobody told me till now?

[EaterPeter]

Thanks for like!

[EaterPeter]

Common things more the better, values, income, should drive, should not be big of a liability

[EaterPeter]

Good credit

[EaterPeter]

There should be definitely systemic approach and or good long check list. More boxes checked is better. More red flags not go unnoticed better. Deal breakers are deal breakers we should try getting all the answers best to the knowledge before committing.

[Gia013100]

She truly single, see has friends , if they don’t that’s a red flag.

[Anonymous]

Trust, good personality and likes sex
Red flag is when they have been though too many relationships and bitchy and don’t like sex

[Adogdog]

Being sweet, caring, and nice and well as cute with pretty eyes and hair.

[Yourfriend2021]

If the girl is cute , friendly, affectionate and seems loyal.

[Soleil7001]

Ability to handle state level security challenges

[jimmy2]

Clear communication. Love, forgiveness. I love her madly how she responds

[Danny_dan92]

If she’s caring, honest, respectful & mature

[Slartybartfast]

Semaphore, the language of love.

[emperor90]

Are they honest and loyal