What do you think of the dating culture in America?

[Anonymous]

[Cynicaldreamer]

It's terrible. That's the short answer. As to why-

People expect instant gratification (ie: sex and/or attention) from someone that barely knows them without taking the time to get to know the other person.
Some people are so needy or can't be single for a short time period because they get "lonely" and jump from relationship to relationship. It's healthy and actually good to detach and find yourself between breakups! But those that don't are doing more harm than good- not just to themselves, but future partners.
As a result, they don't really form any connections or meaningful relationships with their partner... they just want a warm body until one them deem better comes along.

Unrealistic expectations and standards- I think that's everywhere; not just America, but since I've never traveled outside the country, I'm speaking from my experience. Now I am all for having standards of what you do and don't want in a partner and relationship; it's actually healthy and expected to set standards!

... assuming they're realistic.
By that I mean don't ask to date a fitness model if you aren't willing to work on and maintain your own body, or go to the gym.

And let's talk about sex shall we? How some people equate sex with love-
I see so many young girls thinking if they sleep with a guy, he'll fall in love with her. No, don't be stupid!
And don't get me started on that archaic rule some people still believe in that if you don't sleep with someone after x amount of dates, that means they're not interested in you...

Hookup/friends with benefits/one night stands- why are they a thing? No offense if you're into that, but some of us prefer getting to know our date's full name and a little about them before jumping into bed. And for those of you saying, "Just tell them upfront you're not into that!" We do. But that doesn't stop liars and horndogs from trying and getting frustrated when you turn them down and making it seem like it's YOUR fault for having standards.

Dating sites... they're a hot mess. Nowadays dating dating apps and sites are the new norm, especially since the pandemic started.
But let's be real- for some people it just makes dating that much harder. Because now you have to have a perfect profile picture... but not too perfect because then they'll assume it's fake or photoshopped! Write out a profile stating what you do and don't want- which most people won't bother reading if your picture didn't catch their eye... and even then they might just glance over it. And then trying to start and maintain a conversation with a random stranger online you matched with- only to realize s/he can barely hold a conversation, they're airheads, or they're only interested in sex, not a relationship...

Do y'all want me to keep going? Because I just covered the tip of the iceberg here, LOL.
Now I know there are some good points to dating in the States... just don't ask me what they are because I honestly cannot think of many. But overall, it's more of a headache than anything. If anyone wants to refute that, I happily welcome your comments!

[Asker]

Please keep going. To educate outsiders and foreigners, since European call Americans desperate when searching for love.

[Cynicaldreamer]

"To educate outsiders and foreigners, since European call Americans desperate when searching for love." Oh dear, you know it's not good when other countries consider us desperate and bad when it comes to dating-

They're not completely wrong, but still; it is bad that we have such a reputation, lol.

Due to GaG having character limits on replies (which I think is nonsensical), I will see I can keep the rest simple and to the point.

-People are not candid with their wants. By that I mean rather than state upfront what they're looking for (hookup, relationship, or long term relationship/marriage) they play games or are "wishywashy"
-People are so superficial, particularly when it comes to looks. I love how people say "looks don't matter, it's your personality!" Yeah that's a lie. Again, I can only go by things from my perspective, but most, not all, people here tend to be very superficial in regards to dating- especially on dating apps!
-People are too focused on what the other person can bring to the relationship rather than what they should be doing/bringing
-It's nearly impossible to approach or speak to someone in person (in terms of asking them out). Why? If they're not glued to their phones, men are afraid to approach women because they might consider said guy a "creep" or harassing them... just as an example.

Overall, while dating isn't impossible, it's not easy either. The fact people have to rely on dating coaches or dating apps to find love should tell you how dating has digressed over the years- and not in a positive way.

[Luv2screw]

So desperate that they miss the good ones
My guy friend knows I have feelings for him but doesn’t wanted date mel.
But then he. Complains about not dating someoone

[Cynicaldreamer]

@Luv2screw THIS! Oh yeah, I've been there more times than I care to admit.
When you like a person, and they KNOW you like them, yet they refuse to give you a chance... which is fine, if they're not attracted to you. But then don't come whining to me about how no one wants you or you can't find anyone when you're not willing to give someone that does want to date you a chance.

[Neosporin]

Are you insinuating that it's better in another country? Which country and how so? And you're probably right but my professional career is in America so I don't think it's worth moving.

I've been to Europe and sorry but I just don't see how Europe is better than America. Not that it's bad! Of course it's very beautiful but everything is already like 50 years ahead in America!

[HighValue]

People ruin themselves with hook ups and having kids and then become unacceptable as a mate for a good person.

[GreenLanternI0I]

HORRIFIC!! The damage that it is causing, will last for a very, Very long time.

[Recurrence]

I haven’t dated before. I’m just really intimidated by it, I just don’t know what I’m doing and I feel lost

[rod23]

I think its confusing, especially date sites, too many fakes

[Anonymous]

Overdramatized. I keep it simple. If she asks me out I might say yes. Otherwise I don't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

It’s sucks 👎 everybody has too many high standards and expectations.

[Outofthegrey]

As someone actively dating, it fucking sucks.

[Neosporin]

oof trying to get into the game myself right now

[TheBigGuy9]

It’s messed up today.

[Anonymous]

Not good try meeting people in real life

[In_Trance]

it's fine