Is it really that weird to chase a guy?

Question

So we grew up hearing guys should do the chasing always, not the opposite. But is it really all that strange? Is it off-putting & unattractive? What do you think if a girl chases, why is it bad? Does it actually take the work away from guys? Do guys actually enjoy being chased?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Let's be honest women use excuses like "if you chase you look desperate". The simple truth is they're afraid and no other reason. But it's understandable. Putting your pride on the line is not fun. And why do it if you don't have to.
This is why women traditionally don't chase. But there is something to be said for doing it. Because you grab control of your own destiny. Any woman that tells you you scare guys off is full of it. If you ask a guy out and he turns you down he wasn't going to say yes anyways. No matter how many hints you dropped or how much you flirted. If a guy gives you a non answer. That is still a "no". That doesn't mean he might not be a little interested or even a lot interested. It means you caught him off guard, put him on the spot. Or that he just doesn't know how he feels. In other words he may think it over and then start pursuing you. Then again he may not. Either way you put yourself out there. And there's no need to do it again. You told him your feelings.
If you want to be the chaser rather than the chase-ee ( if that's a word) that's up to you. But let me just stress there is no drawback to it other than hurt pride

NamerOfStars · Accepted Answer

No. Culture grows out of biology, and our biology says it's primarily the men who do the chasing, and that's usually true- but the idea that it has to completely and unambiguously move in only one direction is as artificial as it is nonsensical. Those instincts are still present, and I could easily see some guys (not all, but some) having an issue with not doing ANY of the chasing (though they'd probably just call her "desperate"), but reality has a bias towards complexity, and human relationships are no exception.

Most guys would probably be pleased to be approached, though they might not quite know how to react. It's new territory for most of us.

youngmix · Accepted Answer

Depends on what you're after. Dudes I know love it.
If you're just looking for a casual friend with benefits, or just a booty call, then there's no need to understand him at all.
If you're looking for a steady relationship, make sure you like someone who won't use and abuse you. Chase a guy like that, and your life turn to shit at some point. He'll use you up.

dustybiker · Accepted Answer

I always went after who I was attracted to. Why wait? Why play games? Worked for me.

GingerGuy · Answer

I think it's no different than if a guy chases a girl. It's only a problem if the person being chased isn't interested. Otherwise who wouldn't like it? Everyone likes to be liked. I'd love to be chased, if the feeling was mutual. But there's a difference between being chased, and the person not taking no for an answer. But I have a family member, and his wife chased him in school, and he had no interest in her initially, but now they are married! She didn't give up, and in that case, it paid off.

ArchivalMars2 · Answer

I wish I could say it's fine if a girl wants to do the chasing unfortunately, I haven't met very many girls that manage to do it right in a way that's fine and not just weird or concerning. There are only two times I've seen a girl try to chase and lock a guy down so it's rare for starters. Beyond that, I'd say it's just fine and that guys actually like it when a girl tries to get him but there's a way to do it and it only works if the guy finds the girl attractive to begin with.

Lionman95 · Answer

I don't think it's bad. At least not looking at all guys. Speaking for myself it sometimes would be helpful if a woman makes the first move because generally have a hard time deciphering if a woman has interests in me and wants me to chase her.
If she started I could and would take over later on.

Berethor · Answer

The main bad thing about it, is that he might suspect that you acting like that with other guys.

slatyb · Answer

Chase? I think "chase" is a poor analogy, referring to a time when sex was something women traded for the security of marriage. I would never chase a women. I would just ask her out and if she wasn't interested I would move on.

If you want to ask a man out, go ahead.

Sevenpointfive · Answer

i think the problem is that guys know they are being chased and either want you or don't, so he'll make it clear quickly whether he's interested or not. if she keeps chasing then she looks bad for it

_Troian_ · Answer

Well.. u should know not all men are same, it doesn't matter how you grew up. A mentality like ''always man chases'' is very bigot and traditional, I never chased a girl and never will.. it should be equal and balanced, it should come from the both sides. If she's not interested then I won't move a muscle to communicate with her, if she puts effort then I'll also put effort.

Pohjolan · Answer

I've witnessed only once a girl genuinely chasing a guy so its a surprise to be sure when it happens.
However I'd say most guys react positively to it.
Then again cocktease is not as uncommon so if he seems indifferent at first he might suspect that you are just messing with him.

godfatherfan · Answer

I would love a woman to come after me. Honestly, it is about the only way I would date again, so it isn't likely to happen. it is sad that women feel it is the "guys job".

NathanDavis · Answer

no idea... I never really understood what "chasing" someone actually means what does that even mean, exactly? lol

AviatorTom · Answer

Not weird at all. My father (who was married to my mother for 41 years until he passed away) always told the story... "I chased her until she caught me!"

JSmuve · Answer

Is it any stranger or worse than a guy you haven't met approaching you and starting a random conversation with the intent of getting your number while you're out?

awkward_author · Answer

I find it unattractive when a girl "chases" me. It's perfectly fine to ask me out once and see how it goes. However, "chasing" is weird and borderline creepy.

AndrésC64 · Answer

It depends on what you mean by "weird". Is it unusual? I'd say so. Is it off putting? No. I believe the statistics are that 93% of guys would like the girl to make the first move.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

It depends on why I've decided to start chasing him.

Jintendo18 · Answer

Not weird, but the chased seldom feels the same way about the chaser.

roy_ricky09 · Answer

Lol... Good old days... I never had to approach a girl ever

jasco · Answer

Same thing with women, as long as she's attractive. We don't mind

whosnumber1 · Answer

there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. now women should chase guys they are interested in.

Greedier · Answer

Nowadays is pretty normal

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, it reeks of desperation.

moviedude714 · Answer

Can't speak for every guy

andy530 · Answer

No it’s not strange at all

888theGreat · Answer

not if he is a catch and you really want him

CubaPirate · Answer

Not in the slightest in the modern world

sheikalana · Answer

Yes.

Anonymous · Answer

girls do it all the time

TheFlak38 · Answer

not at all

BestWoman · Answer

Yes.

Is it really that weird to chase a guy?

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Is it really that weird to chase a guy?

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