Is it rude to say "I don't want to waste my time" when going on a first date?

[7barbieringz]

A guy I met on tinder asked me what I'm looking for, I told him basically I'm going with the flow, be responded "same but I don't want to waste my time". We're going on a date tonight, first time meeting him. Obviously, if Im asking then I think it's a bit rude to say that to someone u never even met. in my opinion it's implying that his time is more valuable than anyone else's. Opinions?

Yes

No

[Effably]

It could of course be rude but I interpret it more as an explanation as to why he asked you. The explanation being warranted since he ultimately wasn't looking for anything special and so his question wouldn't make much sense.

From that perspective him stating that is giving both you and him some support for the "just going with the flow" notion and would instead be quite polite.

So in my head it seems more polite than rude. But hey, if he expects a lot from date one that was the heads-up warning. If that is the only thing you thought poorly off I'd either just double down on the question of what he wants or shrug it off.

[7barbieringz]

I cancelled it. I don't really enjoy people who have that type of "I'm more important than everyone else" attitude.

Even after I cancelled he was still kinda rude. He said "don't even worry about it". So I'm good on that. No one owes him anything, and if u get butt hurt over a cancellation then I don't want to be with someone where I basically have to please them every day. Just no.

[Effably]

All good! You should trust your own feelings and instincts on these things.

I personally do not feel either response particularly rude out of context but if they were to you, odds are they actually were. Shame about no one getting butt hurt though, ain't it?

[Fireguy17]

many guys have been used for a free meal or whatever in the past, myself included.
I used different dating sites back then, long before computers, video dating then eharmony, which really helped eliminate most of thse.
sometimes it was lunch or dinner and you just knew it wasn't going to go any furthr, but you have to try.
Dating can be a lot of work.
Unless, he said that be cause he expects sex after the date?
No clue on his mind set.

[7barbieringz]

But why be rude to someone u don't know, because of what others did? That's very immature in my opinion

[Fireguy17]

true, one should not be rude to someone else.

[GingerGuy]

I would phrase it differently and at the same time, be more direct. Say EXACTLY what you want, don't leave any room for any doubt or misinterpretation. Example, "I'm not rushing into anything, but I also want something that will hopefully lead to something long term and serious. What about you?" (important to get them to say exactly what they want also). Then you're establishing right off the bat that you're both on the same page.

[jshm2]

It is a bit if an asshole thing to say. But would put it down to first time meeting nerves. Be sure to look for red flags in that date.

[7barbieringz]

Nah I cancelled, he's doesn't seem like the nicest person

[spartan55]

Yeah, that statement puts me off too. For the reason you said, and it's very Captain Obvious too. Yeah we are all here to waste our time! Really? Lol

[Playboy2424]

Nothing rude in that... I believe same.
I don't waste time in dating when I know I want to have sex with her. So I directly came to the point instead of wasting time on date.

[Jamie05rhs]

He makes a valid point. He's a driven person with goals in his life. Hopefully you will respect that. So don't waste his time stringing him along if you don't like him.

[AndrésC64]

I don't really think so. It sounds like he's just saying that he's not looking for someone that wants to play games.