Why do demanding woman get better lovers?

Question

It seems if a girl is selfless and generous she is more likely to get used and taken advantage of.

ManOnFire · Accepted Answer

Do they? It always seems to me that these types of women end up getting cheated on by their men. I think you mean why do women who have more self-respect get better lovers? Because they make it clear to men what they will and won't tolerate, and when men figure that out they have more respect for her, thus she's more attractive.

dolemite89 · Accepted Answer

u can be a generous, kind woman but still have enough backbone not to be a pushover that gets taken advantage of 🤷‍♂️ I think both sexes admire that in each other.

horsenrhinounicorn · Answer

Demanding people usually set boundaries

Kind people often forget to set boundaries to protect the heart, soul, and mind. It often requires personal space for a spouse to reflect and think on their own to buy a gift or think of something kind to share with the other person. Often when together there is a regular routine and actions that create a reaction. Each person has to work on themselves to make change for the better.

Without boundaries, often times people walk over each other without knowing it

Boundaries set an understanding of what is ok and what is not, so that each knows what is acceptable

Opposites often are attracted to each other since they often accommodate each others weaknesses.

Demanding people may get that for the first couple of years, while the other tries to please the other, but there will eventually be a time when enough is enough. Usually in this time that person is getting what they want, but the spouse is not satisfied and eventually it will turn against the other. It takes two people willing to listen, encourage, compromise and accommodate each others needs to bring peace and happiness in the home.

Proverbs 12:4

Proverbs 14:1

Proverbs 25:24

VinnyMac · Answer

If demanding implies thar they're more assertive and make a point of letting a man know exactly what they want then yes, they will be more than likely to get a better lover. A person who is demanding can either be so for positive reasons or for negative because they become manipulative or controlling. If a woman's lover is also demanding then maybe their lover can match them and demand as much from her as she does of them. If her lover is a better lover, but cannot keep up with her demands perhaps their relationship will become toxic and unhealthy, which can create all kinds of problems between each other until one or both are able to change. If they're not able to change perhaps they need to break up and go in their own separate ways.

I suppose it also depends on how you define "demanding," that is a term that could have more than one meaning.

When I googled demanding this was one of the definitions:

(of a person) making others work hard or meet high standards. or I also read:A demanding woman understands her problems and tries to take responsibility for it. She prefers to bring changes into her life by taking requisite action. If she is not happy with life, she tends to take steps to change things around her. or:

When a person is described as demanding, it usually means that he or she has very high standards or is especially hard to satisfy. The word comes from the Old French demander, "to request or demand," by way of the Latin demandare, "entrust."

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dontgetafemalecanine · Answer

well if this (girl/guy) person is a blank paper, have no experience dealing with people, and unlucky at the same time, there may be a higher chance getting used and taken advantage of (by work, by family, by friends sometimes intentionally or unintentionally)

Demanding woman get better lovers - "demanding" should not be the sole reason why they get better lovers. It seems to me that people who demand things generally have high expectation of virtue from people around them BUT have MUCH HIGHER expectation for themselves (well that's why they dare to be demanding lol) to perform "successfully" in personal, social and working lives.

My point being is that they maybe very selective and particular when choosing partners therefore finding the "fittest" of all (matches everything that he/she like, all the things that he/she can't do but the opposite is great at it etc). However, the disadvantages perceived are:
1) Long term-wise, high "demanding" nature can cause serious disruption in maintaining a fruitful/successful relationship. Relationship should be compromising for each other (never make this a one-sided love for one party)
2) is private space guaranteed in their relationship? Both parties should have their personal space respected?
3) You (or whoever) should have other positive virtues that makes yourself/themselves attractive and warm. Some men/women may prefer demanding partner/s (let them be in charge etc) however this relationship may become quite toxic as this person becomes reliant on your nature.

(My opinions are minor. Your thought process comes above all)

BirdieBeep · Answer

People who are obedient and fully devote themselves to pleasing their partner and nothing else do often end up being taken advantage of by someone demanding and manipulative, but that's true for any gender. People who can be kind, understanding, fun and sweet, but know their worth and have the confidence and self esteem to put their foot down when they need to are more likely to end up happier in relationships. Everyone has needs. But those with low self esteem often forget that it's okay to have them, and end up focusing too much on their partners pleasure and settling for lesser treatment.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

I don't think you can actually quantify your feelings into being actual facts. That said, I understand your feelings are your own and also can't be easily dismissed.

Logically it's possible to think if a person, regardless of gender, is more demanding regarding what they expect in their relationships, will actually find someone that has the traits they're looking for.

That doesn't mean more demanding people keep better relationships longer. I guess what I'm saying is that what seems to be or feels to be a certain way isn't always true in all instances.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

If for the sake of your question I reverse it to show a guy's perspective. Nice guys get taken to the cleaners by women who like to take advantage too.
I think the bottom line is, people who are users will look for easy prey, be they male or female, yet sometimes nice people find other nice people and get on great together!

yucychan · Answer

I don't think you should see it as demanding, but more of having standards or criteria.
If you want your guy to do something or expect something from him, then say it to him. People are better lovers because they make their wants and needs known, and not because of one-sided selfless actions.

CuriousJC · Answer

The truth is, however, they say that dominance permeates many aspects of our everyday social lives. Dominance in romantic or married couples is an important but underappreciated phenomenon. The most stable romantic relationships and marriages seem to be those in which dominance is clear from the beginning. Sometimes men will always take advantage of girls who are gorgeous, selfless, generous, and very easy to manipulate. Only thing men has to do is give what the girl wants or Flash some money in her face and next thing he know that girl is completely mind-controlled over the guy until she eventually snaps back to her senses realizing she was violated or hustle or manipulated.

SilverFoxDebutante · Answer

You can be kind and generous and ask, direct, instruct, etc. Do you know yourself well enough to do so? If not, perhaps a little ‘me time’ is in order.

Being selfless sounds a little like the idea of being the hero or victim is appealing. Explore that. You may uncover some interesting stuff.

Also, I believe one shouldn’t lend something with the expectation that you will get it back. Then when you do, it’s a bonus. And if you don’t like the idea of not getting it back, then don’t lend it out in the first place. The same principle applies to being kind and generous.

Passion_Devil · Answer

Not the choice of words I would go for. I would not say demanding but more... Knowing what you want in a partner. We have standards. We know what we like, what we want. We know what we don't want. The chance of setting yourself up for failure decreases as we avoid the men we do not want and go for the ones with the traits we Do. Do not settle for less.

England4eva · Answer

I’ve seen it happen with men also. It’s a personality thing. Unfortunately kindness comes with weakness of some sort. However it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s bad if you have this weakness because it’s also associated with kindness, you see? 🙂
Just make sure you are weak and strong in the right ways.

Diodoro · Answer

Most people who have the nice guys finish last view are talking avoid pushovers that aren't honest with themselves or others.

Girls on average that get what they want aren't actually demanding. Because guys in general aren't attracted to that. And if a girl is too demanding she's either with a guy she doesn't respect or she is and it doesn't last.

Because what man would?

the_bruh · Answer

Yeah, selfless women mostly think about people who say they love her in their shoes. So, she ignored her instincts that he's a bad person and overrides it with "he said he loves me and I can't hurt him" thoughts. Causing her to be blind towards the truth.

DizzyDesii · Answer

I dont think you have to be demanding. You just need a more submissive man. Like i said, i want a man who can be dominant in the bedroom but more submissive outside of it. Its no different from how shy girls are usually ladies in streets but the freakiest behind closed doors lol. I surprised a few exes with my “shyness” lol

nice-girl · Answer

Men like the chase so they are more attracted to the woman who has standards. If a woman has no standards they think there’s something wrong with her.
I wouldn’t say demanding however, especially if she expresses it with words or looks entitles. But simply not being available for the thinks she doesn’t want, yes.

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

Who's more genuine in a relationship? Someone who just does whatever they're told because they want the other person's approval and affection, or someone who demands at least equal respect because that's what they love about their partner?

Is it the one who sticks around when the partner falls and doesn't pick themself back up or is it the person who kicks their partners ass when they're slipping?

motownplayer2000 · Answer

Same with guy. If a guy is giving and passionate about a woman and want to give her everything. He is usually met with resistance, she wants a bad boy, etc… then these women out here complain there are no good guys… just because she left the good guy that would give her anything because she wasn't attracted to him, doesn’t mean there aren’t any good guys. You aren’t attracted to good guys, you are attracted to assholes lol

Aerissa_Jade · Answer

They don't settle, they may get better lovers but they also may find themselves single if their demands are too high.

Silvertheater · Answer

Selfless people get worse luck in love because they don’t know how to stand up for themselves. Manipulative people are drawn in by that.

Subarugirl · Answer

Peaches there is a difference between being selfless and generous, vs being a meek pushover. No real man wants to be with doormat.

Heartache0405 · Answer

Because the world gives bad people good things and good people shitty things

Zenit93 · Answer

She will get taken advantage of if she chooses a selfish unloving man. The selfless and loving man would cherish those traits in a woman.

GlassTop · Answer

A demanding woman will have a hard time finding a partner let alone a marriage partner.

red324 · Answer

Maybe they give a guy more attention than the non demanding type. Even though it's the wrong type of attention.

Makeushiver · Answer

Because they know what they want, where they want it, and with ho much pressure. Guys - well I do- get very turned on when a woman knows exactly what she wants and doesn't hesitate to tell me.

deano1990 · Answer

They wouldn't get me I hate demanding people 😂 I run a mile 😹

jasco · Answer

Cause they know what they want and usually how to get it

Alyssa_11 · Answer

We set standards for ourselves which were not willing to compromise on. Believe it or not men only get away with stuff when you let them.

OddBeMe · Answer

True actually. Women with higher standards have better lives. It just requires more patience.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Because demanding women are pickier and insist on a particular standard of treatment, while the gentler souls tolerate more bad behavior.

Surely · Answer

A demanding woman should know what she wants and expects nothing less. A generous woman will be walked on and probably crapped on at the same time!

mobiusforniner · Answer

Selfless people get used whether you're a man or woman.

ChiTown33 · Answer

Get? Maybe. Keeping? No. Then again it kind of depends on what you mean in "demanding". Everyone should demand respect.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I think guys see that in a girl and it turns him on to her more

lunabby · Answer

i wouldn’t say demanding, I would say ANYONE with good, stable & firm boundaries get “better” lovers. if you don’t have any boundaries or sense of self then obviously you are going to get walked all over.

mostlyitalian · Answer

demanding women get beta males who put up with their bullshit.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

What @horsenrhinounicorn said. Also, if you explicitly state what you desire from the other person, you're more likely to get what you want.

RationalMale · Answer

This is like posts from "nice guys" saying how they only get used by women hahaha.

TheBiggestBelieber · Answer

True I don't know, it's that guys like demanding women ig i like girls good at heart only tho

TheBigGuy9 · Answer

More direct. Men, like me like a woman that is t afraid to take charge.

serious · Answer

To some men it is attractive.

IsoUser · Answer

I think that the reason is in the type of Supposed Guy that each picks Out!

Zygum · Answer

Because such women have one standard, so they go after their standard

Waldoe · Answer

probably right, but she could also meet the man of her dreams, by being open to new relationships...

anton_dee · Answer

It is not only with gorls, it is with guys as well.

exitseven · Answer

The squeaky wheel always get the grease.

Anonymous · Answer

It's similar for men too... If one can demand that means they have more value socially, money or attractiveness-wise.

driven159 · Answer

That goes for men and women

Carlit0 · Answer

Most of my demanding female friends are solo.

Screenwriter · Answer

You have answered your own question, madam...

killaj2022 · Answer

Because demanding women attract beta males

Tinylove360 · Answer

I don't know. But I've seen this too.

Medhat-M · Answer

Demanding people get better everything

Anonymous · Answer

It seems like they're asking to get used.

Nagahime · Answer

They don't.

tponderingundead · Answer

they know what they want.

yucel_eden · Answer

That’s life, big fucks small

EaterPeter · Answer

You get what you bargain for

jahaims · Answer

They don't

michael1469 · Answer

Then they run then off after they trap them.

Why do demanding woman get better lovers?

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