What makes you lose interest on someone you’re trying to know/date?

[Pinay_ako]

Ladies, is this true? 🙄

[mobiusforniner]

I'm out of the dating world now, but from experience...

1) She moves too quickly. Once had a girl have me meet her parents on date #2. That freaked me out.

2) She has an insane amount of debt or financial problems. I dumped a girl just for this reason. I'm not going to take a second mortgage to pay off your student loan.

3) She says she's "just your friend" but gets insanely jealous when you you date someone else. (i. e. doesn't want commitment, but wants you to be her exclusive go-to).

4) She's a hoarder / lives a filthy life. If I have to navigate half eaten pizza boxes and empty drink cans when I walk into her apartment, it's a no-go. Wife material isn't a spoiled sorority brat.

5) Unambitious, doesn't have goals or dreams. Cannot see herself and where she wants to be in life; lacking foresight. Lacking in adult responsibilities, which includes but is not limited to, having no drivers license, inability to balance a checkbook; no basic independent skills like knowing how to cook a basic meal or change a light bulb.

6) Inability to communicate feelings. This is a big one. I dumped a girl because I was so confused about her feelings. Everything was conjecture because she wouldn't tell me what she was feeling or thinking.

7) Liars and/or gaslighters (i. e. attempts to convince you what you're feeling is wrong, despite her actions and behaviors saying otherwise)

8) Wants to give me a blowjob on the first, or even second and third date. Sorry, that's not attractive because it shows me you're either too desperate or you lack self control.

[mobiusforniner]

Why the hell did it put a smiley sunglasses for 8? I'm too old for this emoji shit.

[Pinay_ako]

🤣 iPhone for you

[Therisinghero12]

No chemistry, or negative traits like rudeness or entitlement etc...

[Thatgirlcvp]

When I tell the guy I am waiting for marriage, if he's not down for it or asks me insulting questions. God isn't important in his life/doesn't believe in God. These two are number one for me.

If he cusses like a sailor. I'll tell the guy to please not talk like that infront of me, give him a chance but if he keeps doing it anyway I'll be done.

Certain like really weird expectations in a relationship where I don't feel comfortable doing those things.

Trust issues. Like say he was cheated on years ago and during those years being single he never worked to improve himself/heal/move on. He basically holds onto that baggage and goes straight into a new relationship with trust issues.

Drinking. If he drinks often or seems to have an interest in drinking.

When he does or says creepy things often.

He's a smoker of weed/cigarettes/vape.

If I find out he did any kind of hardcore drug in the past.

If he has kids.

He's fat. He doesn't have to be ripped. Just not fat.

[gayeki]

If he lies, that is the most important thing for me😕

[Pinay_ako]

When you catch them on a lie and that right there is a no

[Finchie40]

I will date any girl I find attractive and feel I have a connection with , Dating to me is just getting to know someone , no strings attached if she is dating other guys as well then be honest about it , I hate liars , I prefer that she isn’t seeing other guys but nowadays most girl’s have a list of guys she is interested in or talking to , when I was youngerI was dating a handful of girls just getting to know them , until I realized what I was doing was wrong in a way , so I was always honest about it , if she didn’t like the fact that I was dating other girls then I respected her decision not to see me anymore , Nowadays I don’t really care if a girl is already dating other guys , just be honest about it , I would tell her the only way I would consider going any further with her is if she stopped dating those other guys , but sadly most people don’t do that, they just lie and that’s a big turn off to me , cuz if I find out the truth it’s over between us , so just be honest, honesty gets you further because it’s respectful

[Pinay_ako]

So you’re ok with open relationships or third party?

[Finchie40]

Yes if it’s addressed in the beginning , not halfway through the relationship, if she is upfront with me in the beginning I respect that

[GoodManDave]

I think someone showing that she KEEPS making really poor life choices... I think someone who admits to repeatedly cheating (and shows little to no remorse) - stuff like that.

I had a small crush on a girl - we ended up "one on one" once or twice because no one else bothered to show up to events. She admitted she cheated on a close friend with her boyfriend, admitted she would have done it again because the "best friend" was ugly and stupid, and the guy was HOT (self proclaimed good Christian girl). Kept that thing going for months. Not a "one time mistake" either. That little crush went away pretty much immediately.

Screaming at a little kid for a minor thing (and getting in their face), screaming at a waiter/waitress for stuff that isn't their fault; that's a big one - being really disrespectful when you don't HAVE to bring out the big ultimatums or "threats." (This is not them endangering anyone).

I think being too intense or creepy especially right away - too much for where we are in the relationship. Saying we should move in together, or that she's been engaged within three weeks every time she's dated a guy...

Talking about other guys she's slept with or messed with in detail, especially way too early.

[HighValue]

"Can I see a picture" is a polite way of asking, "Are you fat or have an ugly face?"

People that refuse to send pictures are often one or both of those. they are time wasters that only want to talk and never intend to meet in person because they know they look too bad to get interest from the person they are talking to.

The only exception I can think of would be if they had a very public kind of job and want to know the person well enough first.

What makes me lose interest is if by their responses I can tell they have liberal/democrat morals. Totally incompatible for me. No point in wasting either of our time.

[Pinay_ako]

Most guys here don’t even use their real faces. So it should be both ways. Don’t ask me for a pic, if you can’t send me a picture of your face too. I don’t want to talk to your duck 🦆

[HighValue]

I agree. Picture exchanges should be mutual. That is fair.

[Snsl153]

Yes, but it's more like 92% of the interest is instantaneously lost. I've had guys here on this site ask in PM's for photos, but why would I send someone I had just met online the day or week before, and about whom I know precisely zilch, a photograph? The conversation usually goes something like this:

Blue GAG stranger: "Send me a photo"

Me: "No"

Blue GAG stranger: "Why not? I want to see what you look like" (even though he himself doesn't have a profile photo).

Me: "Because I don't want to"

Blue GAG stranger: "Oh come on. Pleeeeease..."

Me: "Do you understand the meaning of the word 'no'"?

Blue GAG stranger: "I want to see what you look like. Come on. Show me a picture"

Me: "Good bye!" (blocked)

When I say 'no' I actually mean it. Don't try my patience like this.

[Sandeeppingping]

Woman stop rambling and send me a photo

[Lionman95]

For me the biggest deal breaker is a woman that gives me the feeling that I´m the only one investing in the relationship. I don´t like it when a woman says she invests time and money in looking good for me and therefore sees no further need to invest anything in a relationship.

I´m not asking for money but if she only answers texts for example with one word or one sentence or just emojis I get the feeling I bore her and therefore leave.

For me relationships should be built on a mutual interest in one another and just investing in your beauty isn´t such a sign to me because it´s something a woman does rather for her own confidence.

[BullShark]

Oh boy, where do I start? Lol
It's not just one thing but multiple things they can do which can make me lose interest in them really fast, and probably also the reason why I'm still single even after 3 years of dumping my last ex. Let me just list 'em down as I remember them off the top of my head.

1. When they're still friends with their ex
2. If my friends don't like them, chances are, I won't like 'em either
3. When they start being secretive about everything
4. When they start losing interest in you too
5. When they've lied to you once already
6. When they doubt you over stuff people gossip about you even after knowing you well enough
7. When you no longer feel comfortable in their presence
8. When they out your personal secrets to others, regardless if they're a friend
9. When you feel like you can't trust anything they say or do
10. When they don't have many or sometimes even any friends of the same gender as their's.

[DeltaCharlieEcho]

If a woman brings up past infidelity, drug problems, or has kids I’m out immediately; if they start telling me about the richest guy they’ve been with and the things they used to go do, I’m out. If she used to be fat I’m out. If she has low tier friends that act like bad bitches I’m out. Lots of male friends I’m out.

Women don’t understand what men need or want anymore and they don’t care. They have destroyed our entire civilization and I look forward to the day where they all end up as truly second class humans. F

[Backwoodsbaby]

Has kids or use to be fat? Why does that matter

[Pinay_ako]

I used to be fat 😑

[DeltaCharlieEcho]

@Backwoodsbaby indicators of past bad decisions and the likelihood that she will repeat those behaviors. If she was fat, she will get fat again.

[Backwoodsbaby]

No one's perfect tho who said she a single parent because her husband or boyfriend passed and how can you say fat people will get fat again

[DeltaCharlieEcho]

@Backwoodsbaby highly unlikely that the father died but either way I’m not supporting another man’s children

[Backwoodsbaby]

Hey you do u

[DizzyDesii]

If they ask for a nude or suggest getting sexual early on. If they have more differences in values/interests/goals than they do similiarities. If they smoke ANYTHING. If they still party and drink a lot. If he constantly uses sarcasm or has a smartass mouth. If he can't hold a conversation or plays video games too often. If he has no shoe game. If he makes race jokes, is obsessed with politics, or is too active on social media. If he's not awake during my most active quality time hours 10p-1a lol. I’m petty but thats when I like meaningful conversations. 😂

[DizzyDesii]

And if he brings up having fcked a lot of girls in the past. Automatic yuck

[Kabluie]

i guess the glow-in-the-dark Vans are a good idea to game on for dates then. It's a reasonable checklist, although I like the smart-ass mouth because it leads to fun.

[DizzyDesii]

@Kabluie not glow in the dark vans 😂 Maybe if he got some glow in the dark Nike or Jordans or Converse lol

[Kabluie]

they don't make an air jordan 1 glow in the dark but it would be a good idea, they do have the patent leather shiny which is hot.

[DizzyDesii]

@Kabluie im not that crazy about that shoe. I like old school nike air force ones.

[Kabluie]

AF1s are ok, in comparison to those i'd probably wear adidas superstar, or Converse platform lug-soles are awesome too. Was just at that store the other day.

[MCheetah]

I lose ALL attraction in someone online if they're:

1. Feminists (hates men, are always the "victim," whines and bitches all the time)
2. Woke or Progressive (politically far-left)
3. Stupid
4. Shallow
5. Narcissistic
6. Half-assed lesbians ("bisexual")
7. Polyamorous (cheaters, adulterers, unfaithful)
8. Lazy
9. Excuse makers
10. Abusive
11. Liars
12. Manipulators
13. Masculine or butch
14. Trans

And I can't speak for girls, but yeah, I think that quote is true.

[Ευδεμονια]

I think honestly the “send me a pic” request, for my personal experience, is only intended like “may I know the face of the person I’m talking with?”. I don’t think it’s wrong to ask with this intention, since it’s only a sign of minimum respect to give at least an idea of who you are to the other person… for my personal experience usually it happens mutually, so the pic sending request comes from both parts… so there’s nothing wrong and I can’t comprehend why should a girl lose interest.


In general, the thing which makes me lose interest is… disinterest or indifference. I’m a curious person so I give space to the other person to tell me about her so I can know well her. I want to be treated the same way, if the other person only focuses on herself and don’t give me my space or doesn’t show any minimum sign of interest, that makes me lose faith and will to proceed with the dating.

[petitedollbabee]

When they start lying about insignificant things, like what they had for breakfast or what they did yesterday - it shows me that if they’re happy to lie about little things, then they’ll be fine lying about big things like cheating.


When they pester/harass me for nudes or to sext with them.


When they act like a “pick me”. For example, saying no one likes them, saying they’re ugly, saying that they’re not good enough to have a girlfriend, saying that girls never choose them, etc. But saying those things in a way that makes them fish for compliments or reassurance, and it’s a continuous thing no matter how much you compliment or reassure them. If someone’s just depressed and they genuinely believe those things and say them, then that’s a different story.


When they gaslight/manipulate. Saying that somethings all in my head, saying they never did something when I have proof that they did, things like that.


All are instant goodbyes.

[desperatelyhungry]

When a guy makes it clear he wants to have sex early on. Even if I’m physically attracted to you, my days of hook ups and flings is over and I need more than just good looks. I want a connection and I also want him to show me he wants commitment. I won’t have sex until between a few weeks and a few months in, guys usually ghost you before you get that far. Oh well I guess, less heartbreak if you weed them out early

[Pinay_ako]

Same. I hate that

[Jman001]

Isn’t that a compliment that he finds you attractive

[exitseven]

I had a long distance relationship with somebody for 4 years. We were pretty serious and even talked about marriage and our future. The last time i went out to see her she showed up at the airport wearing a blue hoodie that was all covered with dirt. She got some kind of a weird perm and had it combed over on on side. She told me that she almost forgot to pick me up at the airport..

At that moment i lost all my affection for her. It was weird but I just did not see her the same way. I tried too ignore this but a few months later I called her on the phone and broke up with her.

[Spiritofn]

When effort vs output isn’t satisfactory with the inclusion of dating scars.


I was so close to calling it off with fiancé, I’m sure she started to see it in my eyes. Cause I’m already on the verge of snapping with her now over small shit I gave and gave and gave and gave and then it got to a point where there were results but I had these wounds which aren’t healing I don’t get enough in my opinion for that but w/e anyway. The smallest shit at this point some days it’s like I’m straight up willing to kick her out the door and let her have to hitch hike home to mamas house an 1 3/4 of an hour away…

[Hairylegs222]

When she insults me and tries to play it off that it was a "joke". Unbelievable how many women I've encountered that thinks it's ok to talk like that to anyone. It's toxic and I guess her parents never taught her how to be polite.

There's a shit ton of other things but I just wanted to say this one lol.

[Pinay_ako]

Go on, we’re listening

[MountAverage]

What were the insults you have received from women?

[Hairylegs222]

Ok sure lol. She's in a bad mood more often then in a good mood.

Insecurity body comments about herself. My god these are annoying and unattractive. Ruins sexual moments and many other things.

She uses crying as a way for attention or escaping situations on purpose.

She goes in shut down mode, ignores me, hides under the bed covers, turns her back to me when upset or very emotional. That's childish and immature.

She doesn't know what she wants most of the time. Can't make final decisions. Changes her mind too frequently complicating situations.

Her memory is so bad I have to repeat things over and over.

There's still more lol

[Hairylegs222]

@MountAverage For example: I told her I've been single for years.. She says "You must be gay then hahahaha"... Uh yeah not cool. Thanks for insulting me. Then she tries arguing with me saying it was just a joke. I didn't like it, and find it rude and insulting. Not a "joke" to me.

[MountAverage]

Making fun of someone for being single for a long time is extremely immature and insensitive. The "gay" part isn't an insult, but just the fact that she thinks making fun of you being single for a long time is really bad.

[Pinay_ako]

@MountAverage what’s wrong being single for a long time

[MountAverage]

Nothing's wrong with being single for a long time. But it's wrong to make fun of it.

[Pinay_ako]

@MountAverage yea I don't know why would they make fun of that? It takes time to heal and sometimes being single is better than be in a toxic relationship

[MountAverage]

@Pinay_ako Absolutely!

[TallAnon]

Send me a pic is said 79% of the time when I guy already lost serious interest.

But in all seriousness, losing interest can be because of a lot of reasons; Something serious like finding out someone is of a certain religion or they're racist. Or something minor that just personally doesn't sit well with you like.. being a picky eater or assuming someone pays for you.

As an example, a girl told me she wanted to pay me back 50% of the dinner after a date. When I brought it up a while later she said I was stingy. I would've gladly paid for the dinner, but don't promise something and don't pull through. Told her to fuck off and blocked her.

[USLegionary]

When she starts talking about her ex and what an abusive monster he was to her. Usually it means he dumped her because he was tired of her shit or she was cheating. If she cheats she Belongs to the streets.

[Backwoodsbaby]

My ex was actually abusive and I broke up with him soooo...

[USLegionary]

@Backwoodsbaby every woman must date the same guy then...

[Backwoodsbaby]

Some guys are really bad my ex grab my wrist and said you better be lucky you a girl or I would hit you

[USLegionary]

@Backwoodsbaby perhaps you were abusive to him

[Backwoodsbaby]

Perhaps you just a complete gender roll asshole who know I know I don't

[Backwoodsbaby]

So you say woman lie about abuse and men are perfect all the time either man or woman perfect and you try to claim that and not no anything about me just shows foolish

[USLegionary]

@Backwoodsbaby I'm saying men and women can be equally horrid and false allegations are the go too place of a lot of women ie Amber Turd.

[Backwoodsbaby]

You can't just assume every woman is like amber heard I believe she got what she deserves 😌 but just because she lied don't mean all woman lie

[USLegionary]

@Backwoodsbaby you just can't assume every man is an abuser and every woman a victim. People lie and do shitty things.

[Sirenboobzilla]

Smoking - don't need to smell your ashtray breath, or worse have it in my home

Constantly complaining about women this and that. If I wanted to hear complaining I'd sit in with my girl friends

Talking themselves up as the hottest thing on earth. I like confidence, but not to the point if arrogance

Chewing with his mouth open - 🤢🤮

[wingattebaby16]

when i ask lots of probing deep questions to know a person, then they don't ask me back, not even a simple question.

When a person is talking about themselves all the time, and all it is about is their Exes, cars, sports, video games, and hot chicks.

when i ask personal questions to get to know them or the question requires a little thought to answer, they are done talking, leave, or change the subject.

[NathanDavis]

"not to be racist, but... "

"not to be sexist, but... "

"not to be homophobic, but... "

"not to be xenophobic, but... "

"Aaron Rodgers is better than Tom Brady though... "