I've felt both, honestly, and I have to admit, both of them feel terrible in their own regard; being rejected before confessing your true feelings and the being friendzoned afterwards, specifically in that order.
In fact, this is exactly what happened with me less than a few months ago too. I even asked a question on the topic here (anonymously) and got some pretty solid advice on it too, and now that I'm over it, I wouldn't mind sharing how it goes and why both of these feelings feel so bad.
So I won't get into details, but I had a female friend in college whom I'd known for almost four years now. At first, we were purely platonic friends with some harmless flirting every now and then, but the more we got closer and I figured out how much stuff we had in common (plus, my friends also pointing out the obvious signs of how much we match each others' energies), I eventually slowly and surely, fell for her.
There was this one time when she was feeling down and we had a really serious heart to heart conversation that day. She laid her head on my shoulder and grabbed my hand and I let her. I think she could feel my racing heartbeat too, but she didn't object at the time. A few days later when she was feeling better than before but still down, I suggested we go out for lunch at her favorite restaurant. My treat. I had planned that I'd confess my feelings to her there, and I was sure with myself too that judging by how close we were, her answer would surely be a "me too".
How dumb I was lmao. At the time, she laughed it off and agreed, saying that "it's a date" jokingly and I laughed along. We had a habit of poking fun at each other this way and we never made anything out of it either, so it was normal banter for us. On the big day, guess what? She canceled out on me, telling me she needs to attend one of her childhood friend's wedding which she cannot miss. I told her it's fine and we scheduled it to next week.
Once again, she canceled on me and this time, told me she went to a houseparty the night before where she accidentally drank some alcohol and bow she's hung over. I really didn't know what to make of that at the time because we're both Muslim and before this I had no idea she drank. Nevertheless, she became distant afterwards for some reason.
After our semester break when we saw each other again in college, she seemed pretty normal but her jokes became less and less frequent, and the teasing flirting she used to do, stopped as well. I got the idea loud and clear and never brought up my feelings towards her again. We did have moments sometimes, but I always pushed them aside and focused on the tasks we had at hand. Now she's graduated and went back to her home city, probably for good.
Been rejected, before even confessing you like your crush. A real kick in the nuts.
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Getting friend zoned after being honest about a month in. I’m not a rrush and emotionally bombard another. But I do know after about 24 hours of total time together…5 dates over a month.
Once one makes themselves vulnerable and discover she does not have the same Vibe…immediately to friend zone with look of terror. For me this is much more difficult but life..,
When a guy is in a friend zone, he is having hope that she will see him as he sees her. In a romantic way. And hence, being in a friend zone is depressing, painfully time-wasting, and not good overall.
Getting verbally or clearly rejected through body language, and the behavior of the girl is the best way to move on ahead in life. No other way out of it.
I asked my crush out without wasting any time. Because I knew that I needed to get some kind of confirmation from her, otherwise it would be I who would end up regretting the whole thing. And never knowing what she thought.
Being rejected before even confessing because your crush senses you like them. Wackkk
I hate relationships
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