Girls, if a guy you are dating tells you that he has been abused many times will you ditch him?

[Anonymous]

I have a fear that if I tell the truth about my past girls will leave me, as happened with a girl I was interested in the past.

I had abusive parents who used to beat me a lot. With hot rods, belts, and other stuff , sometimes they beat me up till I became unconscious, cursing, and no food was common. I kept my mouth shut in fear for years. I used to have bruises all over my body and that's why only preferred full-sleeve clothing. They had marital and money problems.

Gay guys molested and groped me twice in different places. Many times I get sad and depressed thinking about my past and think girls deserve someone better than me. Although I do have a carrier and even my friends don't know about any of that.

[Anonymous]

Yes there is someone who will accept you. We all have an imperfect life. The most important thing from my perspective would be that you are in therapy and working on healing the trauma. If you are relying on someone to heal you and make you happy that will never work in a relationship. It’s too much for someone to bear and it’s not possible anyways. If you can come out of that situation with strength and tools to deal with tough life situations maybe even help other people who have struggled with the same that would be a beautiful and valuable. Very much an asset to a partner. I can tell you have poor self esteem work on confidence and knowing that what you bring to a partner is valuable. Then they will see it that way too. This is not an easy thing to achieve I’m sorry you’ve been through what you have. If therapy is not accessible you could start with books and podcasts that you resonate with.
Only one short life you deserve to have what you want out of it! I hope this helps.

[melanieeeB]

Not if he isn't acting like a victim.
Like it's all okay to tell your experiences and get help to learning to deal with it and grow! Abusive sadly happens, to women and men and you have every right to speak up and be heard.

But if you're running around asking for pity and making yourself the victim, I personally wouldn't talk to you for a second. I had my own experiences with abuse and I even hate if people are trying to put me in the victim box ughh.
Only cause I personally and just maybe me, I need a partner who has a strong mental health and is strongly and truly confident. In the end it's all again about confidence lol

[jennifer_bloom]

I would not ditch a guy if I liked him

[sunny02]

No, I wouldn't, as someone who has survived abuse I would sympathize and ask if they want to talk about it, then come up with a plan of action on how to work through it together in the relationship