Should women be picky?

Question

I believe that women should be picky. They are taking a big risk when they choose to settle down with a man during their prime years.

WonderBell99 · Accepted Answer

Prime years? I've never really liked that term. A woman's "youthfulness" should not be her only defining quality. Not everyone wants to have kids. Some women might divorce their partners, have kids from a previous marriage etc. and they may start to date again. A lot of men (and women) date in their 40s and 50s. Just because they are "old" (according to society) does not mean that they'd fail to find someone to settle down with. Heck, I've even seen 60-year-old men and women dating!

Everyone, irrespective of their age, should be picky and have standards (that they set for themselves) for their potential partner. Hypothetically speaking, let's assume that 7 years from now, I have my shit together... then why on earth would I date a couch potato with absolutely zero ambition in life? On the other hand, if I am a party animal who spends all my time at clubs, drinking and partying, is it OK for me to have high standards for my partner? Well.. it is OKAY for anyone to "expect" anything, but we cannot get everything we want... can we? I will never ever date someone who has cheated on their previous partners. I would also not date a fuckboy or a player. I would only date someone I'm compatible with and I'd rather be single than date an abusive asshole. So, yes.. everyone should have the standards that they would set for themselves, realistically speaking.

BlueScorpio · Accepted Answer

Yes, hell yes! Men are quick to put most of the blame on women when a man turns out to be a crappy partner. They won't hold him to the same responsibilities cause a lot guys think men should be able to get away with any kind of behavior just for the simple fact he's male. So women whenever you hear men complaining about high standards and preferences, ignore it because the second you "choose poorly", despite the guy being manipulative/deceptive and hiding his true intentions, they will never let you forget it. In the animal kingdom the males know that if they want to find a mate they're going to have put in the effort/work. There's no "choose better" or "lower your standards so have it easy" talk, it's either they show they're better or they get left out the mating pool.

MCheetah · Accepted Answer

There's a big difference between being selective and thinking you're owed perfection just because you've got a vagina. I look at it like this: Don't ask for anything you yourself can't equal, match, or provide the opposite-gender equivalent of. If you're a female who's a 3 or 4, you're not entitled to a 9 or 10, despite Hypergamy.

You can fantasize about them, but you're not entitled to them in real life. And many men are waking up to this nowadays and not settling with awful women who can't cook or clean and don't want kids, but still expect a "traditional man" being an angry bitter feminist anyway.

Although simps and cucks will certainly disagree with all of this. "All women are queens!" Right...

I just wrote a post explaining this.

Uncomfortable question: Why are men more willing to date any ethnicity or body types compared to women?

HighValue · Accepted Answer

People should choose partners based on their own value. For example, if someone has a promiscuous past, don't expect someone without a promiscuous past to be interested in dating them.

Just like if someone has a kid, don't expect someone without a kid to want to date them.

If you want kids, make sure you are in the correct biological age range to be likely to have healthy ones. (Women under 35 and men under 55 for having their LAST kid).

If you have negative attributes, don't expect someone without those negative attributes to want you.

coachTanthony · Answer

Yes they will have a huge 9 month problem on their hands if they choose wrong and end up getting pregnant.

Lexi_87 · Answer

Depends how you mean by "picky"

If you mean as in they have a list of exactly what they want with no room for exceptions and over the top expectations (e. g be crazy rich, flawlessly handsome) then that's being over the top

BUT

If you mean "picky" as in they have certain standards when it comes to wanting to settle down with someone with good morals, worth ethic, treats them with respect etc... the yes they should be "picky" and not just settle for someone who doesn't work, has no goals in life and treats them badly and cheats.

Ladybugharp · Answer

No, people should not be picky. Being picky means being fussy, which is unrealistic to me - zero, humans are perfect.

Instead, people should be searching more for character traits they value, for example, whether they're compromising, supportive or stable etc. I feel that would be a good way to find a quality, lasting relationship.

As for the looks department, I sure as hell wouldn't be picky and aim for a 'ten', let alone a 'three' especially given im a 35-year-old woman.

I've been reading all the comments about how women lose desirability as they age. Of course, all you beautiful ladies in your 20s are disagreeing, but this truth holds weight.

Anonymous · Answer

They should be. But they should also be realistic. Many women get fucked around wasting their prime years being picky because they are not at the level they think they are at and turn down good guys and then decide to settle later in their 30s for these guys who are either taken or intrested in younger women.

Anonymous · Answer

I think everyone has the freedom to date whoever they want. Why should we force people into dating people they absolutely have no attraction towards them or chemistry with? I think it would be sad if life were this way. There’s about 8 billion people living in this world. We can’t change peoples minds nor control what they do with their lives. So yes, women should be picky. I wouldn’t want to be with a partner I didn’t feel comfortable with, felt no attraction to, or feel any sort of chemistry with. It just would make any sense.

RangerBlue22 · Answer

Is a man seriously asking this? I can’t believe what I am seeing this.

The vast majority of women are naturally picky often to their own self-sabotaging detriment. Many of them have higher “standards” for the men they date then they have for themselves. That’s why hypergamy exists. Some women think having a vagina in itself entitles them to “date up”.

GoodManDave · Answer

And men should be picky as well. We take a huge risk possibly marrying someone who could just walk and get full custody of kids, half the finances or more, at least half the house… even on a whim. And if we’re married, she cheats, and my name is on the birth certificate, and it isn’t mine… I’m still paying for that.

Everyone needs to do a lot better, but they don’t want to, so I doubt things will improve much. Too far gone.

UniquelyBasic · Answer

Yes and no. I agree women should pick a partner who they can rely on and trust but many people in general don't want to settle for anything less than their ideal. Theirs a thing as over valuing traits and aspects of a potential partner that don't matter in order to be happy in a relationship. I just think women should really think about what they need from a partner and what they want because what they want may prevent them from finding an amazing person.

cassanovva333 · Answer

Women place entirely too much emphasis on age and beauty. I would rather date a woman that doesn't look like a super Barbi and treats me right, than some smokin hot, prima Donna, drama queen that makes me wish I stayed single. After all the lies, headgames, and drama.. Not to mention being cheated on by three different women, I'm losing faith in women and dating. I'm way beyond being picky. Count yourself fortunate you can even ask that question still.

Weapon77 · Answer

Of course. Many should be much pickier than they are. Right now, it is far too common for girls to sleep around and not be picky about sex, bu then be ultra-selective when choosing boyfriends. It's a recipe for disaster. It's almost opposite how it should be. Be picky about dating but still give different kinds of guys a chance, but then be super damn selective about sexual partners and avoid hookups.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes a woman should be picky, however her "prime years" will have been lost all together if she spends too many of them never settling for anything.

Frankly if you can't get accept anyone you find in a year your being too picky.

Shamalien · Answer

Yeah, but they should also be realistic. Many women got bamboozled by these hallmark movies into an unrealistic expectation of what a relationship should be and as a result have passed up on a really good thing and will later have far less choice

DizzyDesii · Answer

Everyone should be picky if they have intentions to marry or reproduce. You shouldn't choose lightly if you’re thinking straight. I realized that people who just wanna fck tend to be less picky. I distance myself from people like that

Anonymous · Answer

This question makes no sense? If you’re saying prime years of youthfulness why would any girl or young woman settle down? They would just hot dudes until she started to age into her 30s and 40s and found less suitors and then realizing it’s not easy to find an ideal partner.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know if "picky" is the word I'd use. A woman should value herself, respect herself, and exercise common sense. Though we've made great strides as a society towards equality it still hasn't prevented many women from choosing to play the victim when it comes to relationships. I see it repeatedly on here. A majority of the time it's a woman chasing feelings and simply not using her head.

It doesn't matter how picky you are if your entire selection process is flawed.

CA4444 · Answer

Women are picky… what is difficult is to let go of emotional attachement even when they know it’s not the man they would like to settle with…

dustybiker · Answer

It’s okay for anyone to wait to find both someone they are attracted to and ticks most of their boxes.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Being picky isn't bad, if you know how to identify what you're looking for.  The problem is that people, men and women, don't know what they want all that well.

AdithyaR · Answer

I mean, everyone should be picky. You should be picking someone you really want to be with. No one deserves to be a person others settle for.

Anonymous · Answer

Women should be picky, but they should not squander their 20s either. They should use the power they have in dating during those years to find a good life partner.

CateM · Answer

To an extent, yes. They should look out for red flags but there's no such thing as a perfect person

suckmytitties · Answer

Yes, your choices have a lot to do with how you value yourself, which should be nothing but the best.

Anonymous · Answer

Everyone should be as picky as they can get away with. There is no such thing as being too picky if you are still able to get a partner or date. Of course, actually being too picky is a self correcting problem.

CoolCatMar1 · Answer

Hahhahaa settling down with a guy who is worth it isn't bad

sheenagwapa · Answer

i think it's not anyone's business for a man or a woman if s/he is picky or not. it's his/her life

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Women's prime years 18-25 and ofc they are PICKY AF  30 and up is when they scream " where are all the good men " knowing they are past their prime.

Anonymous · Answer

Of course what the hell is this question  Think of it if you have a sister or a daughter.. do you want her to end up with a bad person

XavierSteele · Answer

I think both men and women have the right and should be picky about who they are with.

MountAverage · Answer

How about we don't tell them what they should or shouldn't do?

Chthou95 · Answer

They already are. Women only find the top 20% of men attractive. That alone should tell you that women are picky and won't settle for less. They want a high value man

Rockstarrrrr · Answer

Nowadays? Oh for sure... Everyone should...

genericname85 · Answer

everyone should be fucking picky! a long term commited partner is an important choice.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Both genders should be. If you aren't picky you end up settling for whatever ish comes your way and that is a major mistake.

Anonymous · Answer

Women have to be pickier than ever before. Most men don't have much to offer these days.

LiamJHayden · Answer

If you mean for long term, everyone should be extremely picky.

Anonymous · Answer

Aren't they? Ever wonder why we keep saying top 20% of men, that women are after? Are you among them?

Furious_Revelation19 · Answer

I think everyone should have standards, there is nothing wrong with that.

PinkRose24 · Answer

Are you picky?

Literalbillionaire17 · Answer

Yes and so should men

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

this is a heavy double standard

suzzieQ · Answer

Prime years? Lol 😂

Akam93 · Answer

I'm a picky woman. I hate it.

BJP21 · Answer

We are just as equally picky.

ZenJen444 · Answer

I agree with you.

MadKez · Answer

Everyone should

Should women be picky?

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Should women be picky?

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