Why does my ex copy things that I’m doing with his new girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Honestly, that’s crazy. It's difficult to say for certain why your ex is copying things that you're doing with his new girlfriend without more information. However, here are a few possibilities:

1. He is trying to make you jealous: Your ex may be copying things that you're doing with his new girlfriend as a way to make you jealous or show you that he has moved on.

2. He is trying to recapture happy memories: It's possible that your ex is copying things that you used to do together as a way to recapture happy memories or relive the good times you shared.

3. He is trying to figure out what he wants: Your ex may be copying things that you're doing with his new girlfriend as a way to explore what he wants in a relationship or to see if he enjoys the same things that you do.

4. It could be a coincidence: It's possible that the things your ex is doing with his new girlfriend are simply things that he enjoys or that are popular in your area, and it's not necessarily related to you.

Ultimately, the best way to understand why your ex is copying things that you're doing with his new girlfriend is to talk to him about it directly. However, it's important to remember that you are no longer in a relationship with him and it's okay for him to do things with his new girlfriend that may be similar to things you used to do together. It's important to focus on your own healing and moving on, rather than worrying about what your ex is doing.

[Cupido29]

1 and 2 are the most likely, I think

[Opinion Owner]

@Cupido29 maybe so

[Asker]

I’m well aware of the last paragraph, I’m not bout what he should or shouldn’t do, I’m simply curious in the WHY. I thought it’s likely the first two too. The question again so why do those though, what’s the motivation and end goal?

[Asker]

Oh and thank you for taking the time to write such a thoughtful response. I really appreciate it 🙂

[Opinion Owner]

You’re welcome

[Opinion Owner]

The motivations and end goals behind your ex's behavior may vary depending on their individual circumstances and psychology. However, some possible reasons why your ex may be copying things that you did with them could be:

- Nostalgia: Your ex may be feeling nostalgic about your past relationship and the memories that you shared together. By copying things that you did together, they may be trying to recapture some of the positive feelings and experiences from your past.

- Insecurity: Your ex may be feeling insecure about their new relationship or their ability to move on from your past relationship. By copying things that you did together, they may be trying to prove to themselves or others that they are capable of having similar experiences and connections with someone else.

- Lack of identity: Your ex may be struggling to find their own identity or sense of self after the end of your relationship. By copying things that you did together, they may be seeking a sense of belonging or purpose that they feel they lost after the end of your relationship.

- Revenge: Your ex may be copying things that you did together as a way of getting back at you or making you jealous. This behavior may be a manifestation of unresolved anger or resentment towards you.

The motivations behind your ex's behavior may be complex and unclear. It may be helpful to focus on your own well-being and happiness, rather than trying to decipher the motivations behind your ex's actions.

[Asker]

Thank you for that, you’ve made me think about some things I hadn’t realised or thought about, which is the whole point to this app! 😊

He’s taken her to places that I enjoy that aren’t really his hobbies, and ones that he never knew about until I bought them to his attention and recommended them. We didn’t get to go to that last one I mentioned as we broke up, but he took her and posted it on social media knowing I’d see it. Do you think that sounds like any of the reasons above from a guys perspective?

[Opinion Owner]

You’re so welcome ☺️. Based on what you've described, it's certainly possible that your ex may be just trying to make you feel jealous or get a reaction from you by copying things that you did with him in the past. It's possible that he still has some unresolved feelings towards you and is trying to provoke a response from you by showing you that he's moved on. Honestly, if I were you I wouldn’t give the fool the satisfaction and worry cause that’s a problem he gotta deal with.

If this behavior is making you uncomfortable or upset, it may be best to distance yourself and focus on moving forward in your own life. It's important to remember that you can't control other people's actions, but you can control your own reactions and emotions.

If you feel like you need closure or want to better understand why your ex is behaving this way, it may be helpful to have an open and honest conversation with him. However, it's important to approach the conversation with a level head and to be prepared to hear things that you may not want to hear.

[Asker]

Of I heard things I didn’t want to hear I think it would be easier to move on, that’s the trouble. When we broke up he said he’d always care for me, and I’ll always care for him too, even if he is daft at times. He was a part of my life and there are aspects of us I’ll always miss to some degree. I haven’t been giving him the satisfaction either as I’ve unfollowed him since, but it has bought up feelings in me even though I’ve not reacted to them to his knowledge.

[Asker]

If he cared for me he wouldn’t be trying to hurt me though right, or maybe that’s just the complexity of human nature sometimes. I don’t know anymore.

[Asker]

After we broke up he wanted to meet up again but he saw another guy chatting by with me (just friendly) but I explained that I didn’t want to date anyone then. He asked why, I didn’t really give a reason as I didn’t want to explain that I still felt hurt about our break up and not ready to risk that hurt again so soon, but I think he knew me well enough to figure that out.

[Asker]

Since then all he’s been posting is pictures of him with a new girl all over his social media.

[Opinion Owner]

It's completely understandable that hearing things you didn't want to hear would make the process of moving on easier. However, it's important to remember that closure is a process and it may take time to come to terms with the end of your relationship.

It's also okay to have feelings for your ex and to miss certain aspects of your relationship. It's natural to feel this way, especially if you shared a deep connection with them. However, it's important to focus on moving forward and investing in yourself rather than dwelling on the past.

Unfollowing your ex on social media is a good step towards creating some distance, but it's important to also take care of your emotional health. This may involve seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist. It's okay to take your time to heal and process your feelings, and remember that everyone's journey towards closure is different.

[Opinion Owner]

Right. It is true for someone to care for you but still do things that hurt you unintentionally or even intentionally. People are so complex and sometimes their actions don't always align with their feelings.

However, if your ex is intentionally trying to hurt you, that is not a sign of caring. It's important to set boundaries and prioritize your own emotional well-being. If you feel that your ex's actions are causing you pain, it may be best to distance yourself from them and prioritize your own healing process.

Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness, and it's okay to prioritize your own needs and emotions.

[Opinion Owner]

Another thing to say is that it is understandable that you didn't want to date anyone after your break up and that you may still be feeling hurt from the relationship. It's also understandable that you may not have wanted to share those feelings with your ex when he asked why you didn't want to date anyone.

It's good that you were honest with him about not wanting to date anyone at the time. It's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and not rush into anything before you're ready.

If you feel comfortable, you could try having a conversation with your ex about how you're feeling and what you need in order to move forward. However, if you feel like you need more time to process your emotions, that's okay too. Remember to take care of yourself and prioritize your own healing process.

[Opinion Owner]

The final part I want to say it’s possible that your ex is using social media to try to make you feel jealous or to show that he has moved on but more so to make you jealous. However, it's important to remember that social media is not always an accurate reflection of someone's life.

It's okay to take a break from social media if seeing your ex's posts is causing you pain. You could also try unfollowing or muting him on social media to create some distance. Remember to prioritize your own emotional well-being and take the time you need to heal and move forward.

[Asker]

Yeah I know what I have to do and I am working towards it, I’m starting to get to know others again now and looking at dating again, and I have been focusing on myself by using my spare time to push my own goals forward more quickly, so it’s not that I’m not doing that. It’s just I still miss him at times and want that back, but logically accept that that won’t happen hence why I’m not taking any actions towards it.

[Opinion Owner]

It sounds like you're taking the right steps towards healing and moving forward. It's okay to still miss your ex at times and to have feelings for them, but it's important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and focus on your own goals and growth.

Remember that healing is a process and it may take time to fully move on. Allow yourself to feel your emotions and process them in a healthy way. It's great that you're focusing on yourself and your goals, and that will help you build a strong foundation for your future relationships. Keep moving forward and trust that you will find the right person when the time is right. You got this and it’s okay to miss the person you were with at times but you have to go on as it appears he has without much consideration for your feelings. You’ll do amazing moving forward without him

[Opinion Owner]

I’ll like you to listen to these songs by Stevie wonder: it’s called It ain’t no use and Superwoman

[Opinion Owner]

It ain’t no use: https://youtu.be/WBVD24d7V5E

[Opinion Owner]

Superwoman: https://youtu.be/CP3GaUwHTgo

[Asker]

What’re you trying to say with the last one lol

[Asker]

So you think the possible unresolved feelings are bad ones not fond ones..

[Asker]

His new girlfriend looks like me too, but his ex before me didn’t.

[Opinion Owner]

The song superwoman is about the strength and resilience of women, and how they can overcome heartbreak and difficult situations. The lyrics speak to the idea of moving forward and finding happiness after a difficult time.

[Opinion Owner]

It's possible that your ex's behavior could be a sign of unresolved feelings towards you, whether they are positive or negative. If the feelings are positive, he may be trying to re-create some of the positive experiences he had with you in his new relationship. If the feelings are negative, he may be trying to make you feel jealous or to get a reaction out of you. Ultimately, only your ex can know for sure what his true motivations and feelings are. If you're unsure or uncomfortable with his behavior, it may be best to communicate with him about how you feel and to set boundaries if necessary.

[Opinion Owner]

It's possible that your ex is attracted to a certain physical type, which could explain why his new girlfriend looks similar to you. Alternatively, it's possible that he may be trying to re-create some of the positive experiences he had with you in his new relationship, and part of that could include finding someone who looks similar to you. However, it's important to keep in mind that physical appearance is just one aspect of a relationship, and it's possible that your ex is with his new girlfriend for reasons that have nothing to do with you. The motivations behind his behavior can only be known by him, and it may be best to focus on your own well-being and to not let his actions affect you too much.

[Asker]

Yeah I know all of this, I’m just more interested in other peoples personal opinions too really.

[Asker]

Those with experience in something similar, whatever end they’ve been on, or observed in others.

[Asker]

So what I’m gathering (correct me if I’m wrong) is that he missed parts of us that he’s trying to recreate with someone else he prefers to be with now.

[Asker]

*misses

[Opinion Owner]

I can’t say for sure honestly as it is understandable that you want to want to hear a range of opinions and perspectives on a situation like this. Some people may see your ex's behavior as a form of flattery or admiration, while others may view it as inappropriate or even creepy. The way you interpret your ex's behavior will depend on your own feelings and experiences with him. It's important to trust your instincts and prioritize your own emotional well-being, regardless of what other people may think or say about the situation.

[Opinion Owner]

People who have been in a similar situation may have varying opinions and perspectives based on their own experiences. Some may see your ex's behavior as a sign that he is still interested in you or that he is having difficulty moving on from the relationship. Others may see it as a sign of insecurity or a lack of confidence in himself and his new relationship. Some may even see it as a form of emotional manipulation or a way to make you feel jealous or inferior.

However, remember that everyone's experiences and perspectives are unique, and what may be true for one person may not be true for another.

[Opinion Owner]

It's possible that your ex may miss certain aspects of your previous relationship and is trying to recreate them with his new girlfriend. It's important for you to remember that everyone's motivations and thought processes are unique, and it's difficult to say for certain without knowing more about the situation.

It's also important to keep in mind that people can miss certain aspects of a relationship without necessarily wanting to get back together with their ex. It's possible that your ex has moved on and is happy in his new relationship, but still misses certain things about your previous relationship.

Really all I could say is the only way to know for sure why your ex is copying things you did with his new girlfriend would be to have an honest conversation with him. But you need to make sure that you are emotionally prepared for this conversation and that you have clear boundaries and expectations going into it.

[Asker]

I know, what you’re telling me I’m already aware of and hold that in context when I ask the questions I’m asking. I suppose it’s good info for others reading too though who may not already understand these things. I feel like I am a bit longer in the tooth though, you learn a lot of this already with age.

[Asker]

I wouldn’t attempt a conversation as previous experiences have made me conclude that it wouldn’t necessarily be the truth anyway. Again, I’m just interested in the general consensus.

[Asker]

I can also offer up more info to help attempt to clarify certain things.

[Asker]

The way for me to move on is to make some sort of sense of it for closure because it’s not like I can completely just walk away from him by avoiding him as he bro no a his new girlfriend up to my city for dates even though they both live an hour away from me. So I’d rather feel prepared for the possibility of running into them.

[Asker]

*he brings his new girlfriend

[Opinion Owner]

I understand. It's good to keep in mind that every individual and situation is different in its own way, and there may be underlying reasons for why your ex is copying things that you did together with his new girlfriend. It may be helpful to focus on your own healing and moving forward rather than trying to analyze his behavior. You deserve to be with someone who values and respects you for who you are.

[Opinion Owner]

In general, it's important to remember that everyone has their own motivations and reasons for their behavior, and it may not always be easy to understand. Don’t let your ex's behavior affect your own healing and moving forward. It may be helpful to focus on your own goals and interests, and surround yourself with positive and supportive people.

[Opinion Owner]

I get that too. It can be difficult to move on and find closure when there is a possibility of running into your ex and his new girlfriend. Right now in the meantime, focus on your own healing and well-being, and try not to let your ex's behavior affect your own sense of self-worth or happiness. It may also be helpful to set boundaries for yourself and limit contact with your ex as much as possible, especially if seeing him or hearing about his behavior is causing you distress.

It is hard to see your ex with his new girlfriend, but it's important to remember that you have the power to control your own reactions and emotions. Here are some tips for how to be prepared if you run into them:

1. Take a deep breath and stay calm: Remember that you are in control of your own emotions, and taking a deep breath can help you stay calm and centered.

2. Focus on your own well-being: Try to focus on your own well-being and not let your ex's behavior affect your own sense of self-worth or happiness. Remind yourself that you deserve to be with someone who values and respects you for who you are.

3. Set boundaries for yourself: If seeing your ex or hearing about his behavior is causing you distress, it may be helpful to set boundaries for yourself and limit contact with him as much as possible.

4. Have a support system: Surround yourself with positive and supportive people who can help you through this difficult time. This could be friends, family members, or a therapist.

5. Practice self-care: Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. This could mean engaging in activities that bring you joy, getting enough sleep and exercise, or practicing mindfulness or meditation.

Remember that it's okay to feel a range of emotions when you see your ex with his new girlfriend, and it's important to be kind and compassionate to yourself during this time. With time and self-care, you can heal and move forward from this experience.