If you push a guy away but he doesn’t let you go, is he a keeper?

[Anonymous]

I try not to let things get to me but my insecurities get so bad that I wanna just jump ship but every time i try to leave he always calms me down and assures me he wants me and will never let me go. I do love him and it scares me a lot.

[GreekLorrd]

It's not healthy to constantly push someone away and then rely on them to reassure you and calm you down every time. It's important to work on your insecurities and communicate with your partner instead of constantly trying to leave. As for whether he's a keeper, that's something only you can decide based on how he treats you, how compatible you are, and whether the relationship is healthy and fulfilling for both of you. It's not just about him not letting you go, but also about how he supports you and respects your boundaries.

[Summeroflove]

No it means he can’t take no for a answer. I’m sorry. If someone lets me go. I leave. It hurts but I want someone who actually wants me.

Im not going to forever beg someone to let me stay. I’m just gonna eventually move on and find someone better.

[SeriouslyFunny00]

Aw, that's so sweet. <3 But soon you'll have to work on your insecurities also, 'cause you cannot always push him away. He'll get tired from it, I suggest to work on your confidence too. <3

[OlderAndWiser]

You judge whether a guy is good for you by how he feels, rather than how he makes you feel?

[Angelo75]

Get help. Like professional help. Those insecurities are not gonna solve themselves. And if you keep pushing him away, sooner or later, he's gonna really leave. And you would have lost a guy that is (was) willing to fight for you.

You could even open up to him and tell him u want help. And go to the coaching WITH him. Believe it or not, there's nothing that builds up more trust with your partner than him/her being there when you are being vulnerable with your coach to heal.
The coach can even give him tips on how to deal with your insecurities.

[Anonymous]

I'd see that as a positive for you. If you push a player away he usually finds another girl. Possibly a keeper. That is unless you've been seeing this guy for years or something. Then I would say you just got a hooked friends with benefits on your hands who doesn't want his booty call to leave.

[FilmGuy93]

The guy isn't taking "no" for an answer, which isn't healthy, but you're also throwing up needless barriers, which is a red flag in its own right.

That guy isn't healthy, but you aren't either.

[boggboss]

Just means he is willing to chase it dont means things will work out or he will love u forever

[shades777]

no thats called a sucker, if he ever snaps out of it he will find someone who respects him

[Shamalien]

I hate to agree but I do kind of agree…what self respecting man is gunna constantly be in the situation of trying to convince a woman to be with him?

[shades777]

A man with a limiting mindset, if you believe your resources are limited you will act that way even in dating, a man with opinions would not put up with mistreatment or risk his dignity

[Shamalien]

I’m actually 28. Mentor me brother. I am very picky and when I finally found a woman who met my criteria, I would do pretty much anything to keep her. When she broke up with me though I didn’t lift a finger to try and keep her. I told her she was confusing and I think she’s making a mistake, but I won’t fight for someone who can tell someone they are everything to them one day and just break up with them the next

[shades777]

It's important to realize that the outcome didn't happen to you but for you and her, the opportunities we have today are because of the choices we made yesterday, and the outcome you want comes from the steps you make today.
Essentially your the fruits of your labor and the on who planted the seed, The path of least resistance.

whatever you want in this life you have to stack the cards in your favor...
You want a woman thats not confused you have to show up with a easy to understand and follow plan, because that my friend makes it easy for her to follow.

Confusion is by definition a lack of understanding

[Asker]

I do respect him. I pay for all the dates, and traveling like 5 hours just to see him for one hour. I fear that I’m giving and giving and it will blow up in my face in the past. It’s not like I’m some spoiled princess who looks down on him, I’m not. I don’t feel good enough for him and I’m really scared I won’t be enough in the end.

[shades777]

Alittle give and take is what might be needed here then

[Shamalien]

I’m clearly barking up the wrong tree here. I did have a clear plan, she was pretty much bipolar though and her parents got involved way too early on. She was the one who had no clear plan. She was all over the place and at the end of the day she trusted her dad more than me and her dad didn’t want her dating me. I fear you made commentary before having enough information. She wasn’t confused by my actions, I was confused by hers because she contradicted herself every second day and would basically act like we were nothing after her parents talked to her. I’m done talking about this relationship with other people, the situation was unique in that it was an ldr and I met her whole family before I met her

[Shamalien]

She wasn’t confused by my actions, she was confused by her own, as was I and everyone else around her. Her actions and her words and emotions were all out of alignment and she wasn’t over her ex. If I could go back in time, I’d force her to take it slow when she started speeding up because it did seem unsustainable. I just got love bombed and I wanted it too bad to be cautious

[Shamalien]

You don’t even know me man lol I was so clear with her about what I wanted and what I was willing to do to get it. I was all in, no pussyfooting, and I consistently put in the effort necessary to achieve my goals. Her parents doubted her, and she began to doubt herself, and with the stress of that and school she couldn’t take it

[shades777]

The give and take comment was in response to the askers reply

[Anonymous]

That would depend if he was a keeper to begin with. It don't take much to con most women.

[outlawbradyjr]

He may be a needy clinger.