Does dating get easier once a dude hits his 30s?

Question

Every older dude I've talked too says that women have the power early on but once a dude hits 30 he becomes more attractive and women are more drawn to him. Have any older guys experienced this in their life. Im young and dating is fucking hard. So im looking for hope.

Lliam · Accepted Answer

I didn't have any problem from age 16 until my late 20s. The thing is, though, I wasn't looking to get married or have kids. But I had girlfriends. None of them were virgins when we met, but they were loyal, monogamous and had healthy values and normal hopes and dreams.

I could give a flying fig about virginity. I prefer heterosexual women with strong libidos who want a boyfriend.

I got a corporate job when I was 26 and had to cut my long hair and wear a suit. My new look was kind of traumatic, plus the job was hard and sedentary. From about age 29 to 34, I gained almost 50 lbs, which compounded my self-image problems. So I didn't have a girlfriend over that period because I didn't want the kind of girlfriend who would want me.

When I was 34, I lost the weight and got back in really good shape. I was also used to my job and my grown up image by then.

I got a gorgeous girlfriend right away. She was close to 3 years younger than I. She turned out to be a psycho and that relationship fell apart after about a year.

But right after that, I met the most remarkable woman I had ever met. I was 36 and she was 30. We wound up living together for over a year. She was my ideal. I loved her with my heart and soul and she loved me. That was the most blissful time of my life.

Unfortunately, for reasons I can't explain, we couldn't be life partners. We separated but I still love her and will never for get her.

When I was 40, I met my future wife. Neither of use had ever been married, but we had both led full lives before we met. We got married two years late. She's 2.5 years younger that I. We've been happily married for almost 26 years. We've built and wonderful life and had so much fun together.

I think the guys who complain about not being able to find girlfriends/wives are the ones who are looking for 23 year old virgins that they can treat like children. But grown men who like beautiful, intelligent women shouldn't have any problem.

Peter_Penetrator · Accepted Answer

Ever heard of a “Silver Fox”? It doesn’t just make us look more handsome.

It is like many other species that display colors in order to attract a mate. Men are also biologically wired to seek out the most fertile mates to pass on our genes.

Yes, for some 20 something women, the thought of dating any man approaching the age of their father, makes their skin crawl.

Or the thought of a 20 something dating a much older man will incur the wrath of her own biological father, and then she would be dating outside of social norms. Like being in an interracial relationship or marriage, or even in a LGBTQ relationship or marriage. Society is just like that.

But with an aging man comes stability, security, emotional maturity, and a man that knows the difference between petty grievances towards his partner are laughable, basically, a man with his shit together and has found his parking spot in life plain and simple.

Daddy issues, well, if daddy was way too loving causing a 20 something to leave home early, a father that ignored his daughter, or just didn’t live up to her expectations of an ideal father, can find those qualities in a man nearing her biological father’s age.

A lot of biological fathers can’t stand the thought of an older man sleeping with his daughter.

A lot of older women detest seeing an older man/younger woman couple because so many older women are abandoned for that someone that hasn’t grown bitchy because she refuses to take hormones or use sex as reward or punishment. Sorry older married ladies, but it is a fact. Just like older men also withhold sex for their own reasons. Sorry older married dudes, but it is a fact.

Ezra_lila · Accepted Answer

Might be! but still depends.
Age doesn't actually define the relationship at all. The maturity of each individual differ in different ranges.
Some reach 30's but act carelessly. However they are some articles talking that when man reaches certain ages they prefer serious relationships and doesn't want to go around the bush.

desidoll · Accepted Answer

Yes, and no. There will be two groups of women who either like older men or not interested in them at all. However, older men do have a better and broader options compare to older women in general.

coachTanthony · Answer

It's easier when he finds his passion and purpose in life.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Absolutely true. Especially after 40.

Avicenna · Answer

Yes, it does get easier

WhateverMayBeWillBe · Answer

In my experience, hell no... I became practically invisible to the women I wanted the moment I turned 30 and no amount of exercise, weight cutting & muscle gaining, better job, etc... did anything to change that. In my opinion the best age for dating for guys is in their college years & mid 20s and the best age for them to find a long term partner is in their mid to late 20s (and early 30s for some). Anyone saying otherwise is a delusional liar, I remember being 28 & 29 in "situationships" with girls that were 19 to 23 that would get turned off by the fact I was almost 30 (and some would lose all interest the moment they found out my age). Now, I find myself completely destitute and any cute girls & women I meet in my day to day no longer give me any looks of interest or try to flirt with me and I feel like I'm completely written off, like outdated phone that should have been retired years ago (like a blackberry or flip phone).

If you are a guy in their 20s, my advise to you would to not wait for a future that will never come, start living now, get out there and see what you can accomplish.

Anonymous · Answer

When I was in my 20's I had female attention but I didn't know myself, had no idea about my life purpose, direction and I had zero emotional intelligence.

This comment 'In my opinion the best age for dating for guys is in their college years & mid 20s' may well be true for some, but not me. n college I was surrounded by women but I was clueless... but then I started approaching women and did really well. But when I hit 30 and along with it more confident, sure of myself, bulked out a bit instead of being so skinny and still looked youthful I started to get much more attention from women and the age ranges widened significantly. I remember when I went to this bar and a woman kept on staring at me, but I didn't recognise her. Then after a while I realized it was a girl that had rejected me when I was in my 20's!

I prefer being single but this doesn't change the fact that I get more interest from women now, than when I was younger. I was also approached by one who thought I was in my late 20's and when I told her my age she was still interested. Therefore I'd say that it's not so much age, but when you find yourself and it just so happens that usually occurs around our 30's. All of this is only going to happen if you look after yourself / health and self improve though. Being around me can changer a woman's life in too many ways...

JSmuve · Answer

That's just something people tell you to make you feel better and to give you the illusion that one day you'll have power. Fact is, when you hit your 30s and beyond, you're not going to be as attractive as your 20s, the available women are single for a reason, and the women you want likely only want a guy who's only older than them by a few years.

So, you'll still have to put in the same effort to date but you'll likely get rejected for new reasons than your 20s.

Best case scenario is you retain your looks and desperate women who don't look as great as they used to give you more attention because they see you as a wallet that can give them kids. Worst case scenario is you become invisible to the type of women you want and called a creep for thinking about them because you're too old for them. Or you have to settle for a woman you don't really want because that's all that was available to you. Dating is always hit or miss, doesn't matter the age.

HighValue · Answer

If all you do is age, then no.

If you use your time to get stronger, gain knowledge, figure out what you want in life AND are willing to work and sacrifice for it, then yes.

One of the benefits for women to date someone 30 + is that she can already see how he will be long term. His Gene's will be more obvious, as well as the habits he has, such as being lazy and damaging himself with drugs and lots of alcohol, or working out and staying away from bad substances. Same goes for his ability to make good decisions such as if he has kids from other past relationships and will have drama in his life for her to deal with, or any criminal past.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

No.

If you take proper care of yourself, you continue to look the same.

Women who are younger value youthful looks and personality, women who are older still value youthful looks and personality. Exceptions to this rule just want your money, not you.

If you struggle now, you will struggle more later.

The easiest time to date is the first year of highschool, it gives you 3 years to sift through tons of same aged women, get to know them, and pick one with zero sexual interaction expectations, so you have the chance to find the real deal. Once you hit 18, you can either go to college for a second chance at it, or immediately start the struggle that may never end.

RavVid · Answer

Yeah, has for me. We get more gravitas.

I live in the inner city but avoid inner city chicks like the plague. I like girls from outer suburbs as they are more feminine, co-operative and nearly always say yes when I invite them to an inner city cafe. They drive to me (bonus), park in my building and often have packed an overnight bag.

In any case why would they want a long drive home when there is empty slot in my double bed? Particularly if they have had a few drinks?

It sure has got better for me.

RealMarek · Answer

I dated during two times of my life: in my 20s and in my 40s. By far, I found dating in my 40s much easier. I think if you are stable, not addicted to anything, and reasonably fit then dating gets easier in one’s 30s, but there are some caveats. You’ll still probably only attract women of similar attractiveness as yourself or less. If you are not stable, it can put a lot of women off from you. Also, many of the women will have histories that affect them (children, divorce, etc.) and need someone who is understanding of that, and if you do not want to deal with that the number of women available gets a lot smaller. But if you’re just looking for a nice, attractive lady there are plenty available.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

I don't think that ''dating'' is a competition.
I can't speak for the younger folks... but with age comes some relaxed view on life; especially after we discover that our Testosterone level is not ALL that can be interesting.
Therefore, I'd say that it's not easier, but with self confidence and with less desperation it's more likely to score :)
If it's worth it... depends on the quality of girls we are after.
Also: one can be disagreeable and the ''loser-type'' at any age... below 30 or above 30.

Rei13 · Answer

I think it is easier for older men. Typically by the time you are in your thirties you’re more financially stable, settled down, mature etc and so long as you take care of yourself you can attract women your own age or whatever your preferences are.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Yeah bro way easier. You'll be established better financially and emotionally. You'll be a man not a boy in their eyes. The nice thing is you'll still be pulling the same girls if you want them AND the older ones that are your age (who honestly are a lot less inhibited and work harder if you find one that hasn't let herself go). Even in my 40s I'd say it's better and I had a BLAST dating in college, so that says a lot.

Anonymous · Answer

OMFG yes! Now it DOES help if you're making something of your life, but for SURE dating gets better for a guy in his 30s if he's doing well in other aspects. I remember being at a party in my late 20s/early 30s and there was this dude who was a bit of a nerd but was employed, good job, decent guy. He was definitely NOT someone who was a player or used to getting female attention. Anyway, he's hitting it off with this one girl, a bit mousey but not unattractive. Then this other girl with the most phenomenal pair of tits you've ever seen basically THROWS herself at him. And I was just like "I wish I could film this moment and put out a public service annoucement to guys that basically says, 'Stay in school kids!'" lol!

lightbulb27 · Answer

gets easier as people mature, women are at their peak hormonally and desperate to settle down and make offspring or to find someone after their first marriage blows up and they need help with their kids. doesn't mean it's easier for you if you haven't matured and have much to learn, you may suffer greatly.

EricSummer · Answer

When you have had a good job for a while it is easier as your resources help attract women. Typically this applies more in your 30s and not yet in your 20s.

However, I found dating purer at school and at university, simply because the attraction worked without such second thoughts, and we just wanted to be together.

Kaamraj · Answer

It depends, remember the saying that "women are born but a man is made" after 30 you will experience what women experience in their early 20s if you put in the work and get yourself up socio-economically and physically. I can say this from personal experience I date women exclusively in their early 20s and myself am in my mid 30s. I am an electrical engineer by trade who opened up a consultancy firm in my country.

Anonymous · Answer

It has more to do with the fact that you have a career and are more established. Thus giving you the advantage over women they need to feel attracted and happy with you.

Most men by their 30's have sorted life out enough over women, its also the time women start realizing they hit the wall and need to settle. So the market is far better for men, and will improve further until they get too old.

Keishio · Answer

As a 31 year old, in relatively good shape, earning a good salary. No, dating and even making friends is harder. Feels like it's common place for men but you'll feel practically invisible to people and loneliness is something you'll become used to

MrCommodore · Answer

I don't know about power dynamics, but yes there was definitely a major increase in attention from girls from 27 or 28 onwards.

I've definitely got lots of attention from various women in the last 5 years, and I'm not a player type.

Jersey2 · Answer

Let’s say it does get easier as he has a good job, house, car and money in the bank plus he is more mature and worldly. But what does he have to choose from? Divorcees, single moms, the well used Tinder girl, the gold digger, the nut job… it’s not that great I would guess.

BlackJeep · Answer

100%. In high school I was a good looking athlete, popular and did ok. It's so easy now. However, I have an adult daughter that I am really close with and that is a dating cheat code. I own a mirror and it isn't looks. But a good credit score is a must.

Shamalien · Answer

Eh depends. Woman would land on my lap as a teen but I wasn’t really prepared to handle those situations correctly. And they were sloots. As a late twenties man with a car and a career I feel more comfortable actually pursuing a woman. Working out helps

Apple1996 · Answer

Nah I think for guys searching to settle down with a woman they actually love it is more difficult to find that in their 30s+. If the guy just wants a fling then that's easy to find so depends what you are looking for

mandyfire98 · Answer

I can't answer obviously from a guys perspective but I can only say that I'm more attracted to older guys usually.

BCA6010 · Answer

Maybe a bit, but a lot more of the women close to that age have significantly more baggage. The "attractiveness" aspect has more to do with maturity and security, in my opinion.

Leapfrog00 · Answer

It became harder for me. All the girls I met either aren't looking, married, or aren''t interested. I wouldn't date any of the girls around where I live. I think some girls are so broken, they gave up too.

Vegasrunner · Answer

You already know the answer is yes it's just difficult for younger guys to accept. Reality is what men are valued on is nearly impossible to accomplish as a teenager 20 something.

Jemini_Crocket · Answer

I personally prefer guys in their early 30s. Usually they're more attractive, wiser and life's already given them few lessons.

mobiusforniner · Answer

Yes. I dont know why. Mid 30s here. Im married. And I seem to get lots of attention... older, younger, single, married... i dont even have to try. I smile and suddenly conversations start.

ArrowheadSW · Answer

I would say that dating was easier when I was in my 30's. I miss those days actually.

Adam1978 · Answer

Not unless you get your shit together. So not just because you age but because you actually have built a life.

FreyaRed · Answer

When I'm 26 and 30 boys hit my +4 years limit I will tell you.

Luopio27 · Answer

It all depends on your standards. The prettiest ones are above avarage and so are their standards. But those who dont stand out in the looks, are easy to get and less likely to leave you for the better one.

sheikalana · Answer

Don't know how it is as a man but as a woman I find it easier.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Single guys I know always seem to be dating.

Noodle_fan · Answer

i dont think age has nothing to do with it if you are still young and already succesful , you will naturally attract many of them just being real , by the way

DextroShade · Answer

Yes because that is usually when a man is hitting his stride in life, assuming he is not a loser.

Babygirl_S · Answer

I'm attracted to older guys upto 15 years older than me if they don't look old.

exitseven · Answer

I bet it gets harder.. A lot of girls are already married and it is harder to meet people.

Blueeyes81 · Answer

It's been the opposite for me. I did alright in my teens and 20's. From there on its been down hill.

Guanfei · Answer

Easier?

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Yes; it's easier. (It's just that the options are fewer. According to my preferences.)

BLP11520 · Answer

Well I got married at 26 so. I have heard that it is not easy now for anyone which is heartbreaking

Willoughby23 · Answer

I doubt it. Unless turning thirty suddenly makes me tall and fit I don’t see how that would help.

Lynx122 · Answer

Yes I think so.

007kingifrit · Answer

yea dating gets easier in your 30s

Jltakk · Answer

NOPE. It gets even harder.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, it does get easier

TooHot2Care · Answer

Yup.

Does dating get easier once a dude hits his 30s?

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Does dating get easier or harder for men in late twenties?

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Does dating get easier or harder for men in late twenties?

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