The men who are struggling and complaining about it are probably what gives the image that all men are struggling. But you have to remember that women still want men to feel like it’s hard for them to get a date or have options as well. So even if you have guys complaining, women are still also wanting to perpetuate the image by labeling guys as incels or lonely and single, while trying to ignore how many women are lonely and single themselves.
Men struggle much more today then say 20 years ago thanks to the internet. Competition is now world wide where 20 years ago you just had to compete with guys in the neighborhood.
8
0 Reply
Anonymous
(18-24)
2 d
Not really proud of this one, and I’m sure I will be judged but it happened. My husband and I will throw parties/little get togethers roughly twice a month every other weekend. A couple years ago during one of them we were all drinking pretty heavy. My husband drank so much he passed out and I stayed up since people were still at our house. Eventually everyone had left except for my husband’s best friend. Literally his best friend.. grew up together and was his best man in our wedding. We all had been swimming so I was still in my thong bikini, and he just out of no where grabs my ass and said he has been wanting to see me naked for years. Next thing I knew we were in our guest bathroom and I’m naked and giving him a blowjob. Did that for a few minutes and then he fucked me. In the moment it was kinky and hot because I was drunk and the taboo of my husbands best friend inside me while my husband was asleep upstairs in our bed, but the next day obviously I felt terrible. This was 2 years ago and we never told my husband. I was drinking tequila that night and haven’t drank it since. I drink but I can control myself on everything but tequila. The next party we threw I told his friend that can never happen again and he agreed although sometimes he will still drink too much and grab my ass in the pool but I never give him any response to it because I make sure I don’t get that drunk around him anymore.
With the constant negativity & toxicity as found on this forum is it really any surprise?
There are so many posts that women have high body counts, aren't responsible, etc. that it so turns off respectable women with low body count - like I've only slept with 2 men in my entire life & I don't dress cheaply either - that few decent women wouldn't even bother pausing long enough to get such negative & toxic men the time of day.
Even women with high body counts & low standards would be turned off after a while
1
2 Reply
Opinion Owner
2 d
*that few decent women would even bother
I mean the generalization that all women are X & Y is sooo soo boring & dullwitted.
For average to below average men looking for a long term relationship it is hard. Statistically women get more picky as their body count rises. Women have a higher body count nowadays. Most of men's sexual energy is directed towards porn actresses nowadays too. Which set up the perfect scenario for onlyfans to exist. A tsunami of women signed up for onlyfans thinking "omg we can finally milk these losers without even dating them." Perhaps that was the true motive of feminism all along?
I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just a very vocal minority who struggled with dating, but I’m sure a lot of men do have issues like women do but without a community to help support them, it tends to amplify the negative aspects in a way it seemingly doesn’t for women
2
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
3 d
It really depends on
1. Thier attractiveness: your attractiveness is the biggest factor. Women will say it's a man's confidence. But if she doesn't find him attractive at all she won't even listen to him long enough to discover his confidence.
2. Confidence: honestly the more indifferent about whether you get a date the better you're going to fare.
Those are the 2 biggest factors that get your foot in the door. If you don't have those two you're not going to fare very well. After this it's largely knowing and recognizing good women vs. The trash. Knowing when a woman genuinely wants to date vs. Just a "pick me" girl. Most women just want to play around with most guys. So don't beat yourself up. It's not you, it's them.
I struggle with dating. Wouldn't say the other two. Middle aged divorced dating with kids is a mess. If your looking for a hookup it is probably not an issue.
But if you want to genuinely meet someone, it's difficult because almost everyone is settled, with houses and children's schedules and expectations. And let's face it, the pool has far fewer in it.
just look at the divorce rates and there's your answer
women aren't just overwhelmingly filing for divorce on men, they are filing for divorce on each other too. yes that's right, lesbian marriages have a higher divorce rate than heterosexual marriages
this is the equivalent of a superstar athlete carrying a team full of bums
Because they dont put enough effort and expect girls to be attracted, many of the guys complaining about not getting girls dont even go to gym or do skincare and are not hygienic too! Dont complain if you dont try!
2
1 Reply
Asker
2 d
It's a very interesting thing. As a guy growing I guess I just had a bad life. Because I wasn't allowed to shower or wash my clothes as a kid.
When I grew up and was dating I was clean and fresh and I always loved clothes and style because I was poor growing up.
But then if I look at a lot of men who struggle, those men might be lacking in these things.
But the funny thing is, the men don't understand that they have to do those things.
Then there are other men who DO do those things but still can't a girl to save his life.
Apparently, most men are just worthless sacks of shit and I'm just lucky I was born tall and handsome.
Anytime a guy struggles with dating its not due to any reason besides something is wrong with him.
I think most men are utterly lost with women. Utterly.
I don't see them as lazy I see them as lost.
What do you think about that? My perspective is confused because I am a very very lucky man. I am lucky that women will alk right up to me and ask me directly for my number a date or even for sex.
I struggled with this. I did not think I was attractive to girls. I thought there was something inherently wrong with me and I would never find anyone. My best friend always had plenty of girlfriends. I used to watch guys that were not as good looking as I was have girlfriends.
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(45 Plus)
2 d
I don't know how it works for other guys. Some guys tell dating tales full of woe, but some guys are just awkward or they blame girls for everything that goes wrong in their life.
I am engaged now. When I was dating, I could always find dates through online dating sites and met some women who are quite wonderful, though not necessarily a good match for me. Experience had put me at ease in dating situations, I;m never at a loss for words, and I always looked forward to my dates.
Dating after my divorce at 50 was easier than when I was in high school. And I was an athlete and popular in high school as opposed to bald and dad bod now. 90% of the women I dated were good women and VERY attractive, nothing to complain about.
The majority of men can get laid at least it’s not just the top 20% like they’re always talking about on redpill stuff. They may not get as hot of a girl as they think they deserve or as many girls as they hope for but that doesn’t mean all is hopeless. 😂
It's true. MANY men struggle with dating and sex. In fact, studies show that 1/3 men under the age of 30 is either a virgin or hasn't had sex in at least a year.
Let me answer your question like this: I know more guys who aren't interested in dating than I do guys who are interested in dating but can't find anyone to go on dates with.
0
2 Reply
Asker
2 d
Honestly I am one of those guys who could easily date but I do not want to.
Like, I'm sorry but women are annoying. She can't just sit there and enjoy being in your presence as two people who love eachother.
No. They want to constantly be busy. They can't sit still for two fucking seconds. They can't not be talking to you for 2 fucking seconds.
They need a minimum of like 4 hours a day of just straight talking.
Even if you fuck them good. Even if you make her cum for ours on end. She just wants more to cling to you every waking hour.
And they turn into cry babies if you dont feed them enough attention.
I'm literally done dating until I can find a woman who is just a normal fucking human being.
I know everyone wants society to go back to the traditional life of man works and woman raises kids.
I hate that idea. That is like the epitome of annoying wife life.
I'd much rather split things down the middle take in equal responsibility for raising the kids, and have a woman who is a normal person and not obsessed with gender stereotypes. Not obsessed with being a small cute feminine woman who is in awe of her hulking manly man who takes care of her and the kids.
Like it's just annoying I'm sorry everyone with their gender stereotypes and how if we deviate it means societal collapse. I think it's nonsense.
a lot of men are struggling. Dating isn't easy for men like a lot of people think it is. In 2023 63% of men are single and only 34% of women are single. That should tell you everything you need to know. Most men are invisible to women and only the hyper successful men are noticed. This is why as a man, you really have to do your best to build your value in different areas
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)
3 d
It's hard to say, because a guy could have a lifetime of trying to date and do all those things, and have had no luck, vs the guy in a temporary dry spell, vs the guy who thinks he's struggling, but in reality, he isn't trying.
If they are avoiding women then they cannot really be said to be struggling. This would then include men "going their own way" by choice.
Anyway, the average guy can still get a girlfriend and thereby join the majority of men who are sexually active.
To be fair, he average guy may not do well specifically on dating apps. In addition, he will not usually be able to get casual sex without any commitment from changing partners. This option is open to fewer men.
Watch out with the average man, though. Do not forget he stands 5'10'' tall and he is not shy.
@DarkWinterNights - Ironically, it is quite possible that 80% of redpillers are struggling with women. This way, their subjective reality matches their mindset.
Home > Dating > Questions > Many men struggle with dating, sex, and love...or do they? Does the average man struggle or it only a small percentage of men who struggle so badly?
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Opinion
18Opinion
The men who are struggling and complaining about it are probably what gives the image that all men are struggling. But you have to remember that women still want men to feel like it’s hard for them to get a date or have options as well. So even if you have guys complaining, women are still also wanting to perpetuate the image by labeling guys as incels or lonely and single, while trying to ignore how many women are lonely and single themselves.
Men struggle much more today then say 20 years ago thanks to the internet. Competition is now world wide where 20 years ago you just had to compete with guys in the neighborhood.
Not really proud of this one, and I’m sure I will be judged but it happened. My husband and I will throw parties/little get togethers roughly twice a month every other weekend. A couple years ago during one of them we were all drinking pretty heavy. My husband drank so much he passed out and I stayed up since people were still at our house. Eventually everyone had left except for my husband’s best friend. Literally his best friend.. grew up together and was his best man in our wedding. We all had been swimming so I was still in my thong bikini, and he just out of no where grabs my ass and said he has been wanting to see me naked for years. Next thing I knew we were in our guest bathroom and I’m naked and giving him a blowjob. Did that for a few minutes and then he fucked me. In the moment it was kinky and hot because I was drunk and the taboo of my husbands best friend inside me while my husband was asleep upstairs in our bed, but the next day obviously I felt terrible. This was 2 years ago and we never told my husband. I was drinking tequila that night and haven’t drank it since. I drink but I can control myself on everything but tequila. The next party we threw I told his friend that can never happen again and he agreed although sometimes he will still drink too much and grab my ass in the pool but I never give him any response to it because I make sure I don’t get that drunk around him anymore.
What does this have to do with the question? Take this Reddit confessions or something
With the constant negativity & toxicity as found on this forum is it really any surprise?
There are so many posts that women have high body counts, aren't responsible, etc. that it so turns off respectable women with low body count - like I've only slept with 2 men in my entire life & I don't dress cheaply either - that few decent women wouldn't even bother pausing long enough to get such negative & toxic men the time of day.
Even women with high body counts & low standards would be turned off after a while
*that few decent women would even bother
I mean the generalization that all women are X & Y is sooo soo boring & dullwitted.
You deleted our comments lmfao
For average to below average men looking for a long term relationship it is hard. Statistically women get more picky as their body count rises. Women have a higher body count nowadays. Most of men's sexual energy is directed towards porn actresses nowadays too. Which set up the perfect scenario for onlyfans to exist. A tsunami of women signed up for onlyfans thinking "omg we can finally milk these losers without even dating them." Perhaps that was the true motive of feminism all along?
"we can milk these losers without even dating them" sorry but 🤣🤣🤣. Interesting way of putting it. Can only imagine you're right.
I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just a very vocal minority who struggled with dating, but I’m sure a lot of men do have issues like women do but without a community to help support them, it tends to amplify the negative aspects in a way it seemingly doesn’t for women
It really depends on
1. Thier attractiveness: your attractiveness is the biggest factor. Women will say it's a man's confidence. But if she doesn't find him attractive at all she won't even listen to him long enough to discover his confidence.
2. Confidence: honestly the more indifferent about whether you get a date the better you're going to fare.
Those are the 2 biggest factors that get your foot in the door. If you don't have those two you're not going to fare very well. After this it's largely knowing and recognizing good women vs. The trash. Knowing when a woman genuinely wants to date vs. Just a "pick me" girl. Most women just want to play around with most guys. So don't beat yourself up. It's not you, it's them.
I struggle with dating. Wouldn't say the other two. Middle aged divorced dating with kids is a mess. If your looking for a hookup it is probably not an issue.
But if you want to genuinely meet someone, it's difficult because almost everyone is settled, with houses and children's schedules and expectations. And let's face it, the pool has far fewer in it.
just look at the divorce rates and there's your answer
women aren't just overwhelmingly filing for divorce on men, they are filing for divorce on each other too. yes that's right, lesbian marriages have a higher divorce rate than heterosexual marriages
this is the equivalent of a superstar athlete carrying a team full of bums
Because they dont put enough effort and expect girls to be attracted, many of the guys complaining about not getting girls dont even go to gym or do skincare and are not hygienic too! Dont complain if you dont try!
It's a very interesting thing. As a guy growing I guess I just had a bad life. Because I wasn't allowed to shower or wash my clothes as a kid.
When I grew up and was dating I was clean and fresh and I always loved clothes and style because I was poor growing up.
But then if I look at a lot of men who struggle, those men might be lacking in these things.
But the funny thing is, the men don't understand that they have to do those things.
Then there are other men who DO do those things but still can't a girl to save his life.
Apparently, most men are just worthless sacks of shit and I'm just lucky I was born tall and handsome.
Anytime a guy struggles with dating its not due to any reason besides something is wrong with him.
I think most men are utterly lost with women. Utterly.
I don't see them as lazy I see them as lost.
What do you think about that? My perspective is confused because I am a very very lucky man. I am lucky that women will alk right up to me and ask me directly for my number a date or even for sex.
Most men don't experience what I experience.
So I really truly do not know what to think.
See for yourself.
Sign up on online dating with 2 accounts.
One account as a man.
One account as a woman.
Pick pictures, that you'd consider fine (nothing over the top for the female account).
And then see how many matches and inbox messages you get on either account.
You will find, that the man's account will be a Sahara desert and the female account will feel like you're a celebrity.
I struggled with this. I did not think I was attractive to girls. I thought there was something inherently wrong with me and I would never find anyone. My best friend always had plenty of girlfriends. I used to watch guys that were not as good looking as I was have girlfriends.
I don't know how it works for other guys. Some guys tell dating tales full of woe, but some guys are just awkward or they blame girls for everything that goes wrong in their life.
I am engaged now. When I was dating, I could always find dates through online dating sites and met some women who are quite wonderful, though not necessarily a good match for me. Experience had put me at ease in dating situations, I;m never at a loss for words, and I always looked forward to my dates.
Dating after my divorce at 50 was easier than when I was in high school. And I was an athlete and popular in high school as opposed to bald and dad bod now. 90% of the women I dated were good women and VERY attractive, nothing to complain about.
The majority of men can get laid at least it’s not just the top 20% like they’re always talking about on redpill stuff. They may not get as hot of a girl as they think they deserve or as many girls as they hope for but that doesn’t mean all is hopeless. 😂
It's true. MANY men struggle with dating and sex. In fact, studies show that 1/3 men under the age of 30 is either a virgin or hasn't had sex in at least a year.
Let me answer your question like this: I know more guys who aren't interested in dating than I do guys who are interested in dating but can't find anyone to go on dates with.
Honestly I am one of those guys who could easily date but I do not want to.
Like, I'm sorry but women are annoying. She can't just sit there and enjoy being in your presence as two people who love eachother.
No. They want to constantly be busy. They can't sit still for two fucking seconds. They can't not be talking to you for 2 fucking seconds.
They need a minimum of like 4 hours a day of just straight talking.
Even if you fuck them good. Even if you make her cum for ours on end. She just wants more to cling to you every waking hour.
And they turn into cry babies if you dont feed them enough attention.
I'm literally done dating until I can find a woman who is just a normal fucking human being.
I know everyone wants society to go back to the traditional life of man works and woman raises kids.
I hate that idea. That is like the epitome of annoying wife life.
I'd much rather split things down the middle take in equal responsibility for raising the kids, and have a woman who is a normal person and not obsessed with gender stereotypes. Not obsessed with being a small cute feminine woman who is in awe of her hulking manly man who takes care of her and the kids.
Like it's just annoying I'm sorry everyone with their gender stereotypes and how if we deviate it means societal collapse. I think it's nonsense.
Immature women can definitely be exhausting, but they aren't all like that. I'm not very interested in dating either, but for different reasons lol
a lot of men are struggling. Dating isn't easy for men like a lot of people think it is. In 2023 63% of men are single and only 34% of women are single. That should tell you everything you need to know. Most men are invisible to women and only the hyper successful men are noticed. This is why as a man, you really have to do your best to build your value in different areas
It's hard to say, because a guy could have a lifetime of trying to date and do all those things, and have had no luck, vs the guy in a temporary dry spell, vs the guy who thinks he's struggling, but in reality, he isn't trying.
About 30% of younger men struggle in these areas. It is a large minority, but most are still doing fine, anyway.
Eh, those are old numbers. A slim majority of single men in recent polls are actually avoiding women.
If they are avoiding women then they cannot really be said to be struggling. This would then include men "going their own way" by choice.
Anyway, the average guy can still get a girlfriend and thereby join the majority of men who are sexually active.
To be fair, he average guy may not do well specifically on dating apps. In addition, he will not usually be able to get casual sex without any commitment from changing partners. This option is open to fewer men.
Watch out with the average man, though. Do not forget he stands 5'10'' tall and he is not shy.
@DarkWinterNights - Ironically, it is quite possible that 80% of redpillers are struggling with women. This way, their subjective reality matches their mindset.