Does a single woman who has kids make her less attractive?

[Akam93]

[Hithere4567]

Not at all. She's just as attractive with kids.

[Hithere4567]

Thanks for the MHO.

[LoverOfBooty23]

It does not

[coachTanthony]

Of course. Men don't want to raise other men's sperm.

[ShadezMcgee]

It does, for a lot of men, yes. Most men do not want to help raise or deal with another man's kids. He would have to look at them as a constant reminder that she was with someone else prior to him and to add insult to injury, there are instances when men want a kid of their own flesh and blood with some of these women and the women may not want any more kids. Fair, but how is it fair to the guy who may want his own flesh and blood to be denied and instead have to be okay with only being a step-dad and substitute in name only? Also, this is a kick to the balls if the man is supporting her and her kid as well.

They will likely not be given respect or have any say on how the kid potentially will be raised if he decides to settle down with the mother. The biggest thing that can overlook most of this is if the mother was widowed. Otherwise if it was a split and the baby daddy is still in the picture with mutual custody or child support, it is a potential risk the daddy can come back to rekindle the relationship they had or just be a nuisance to deal with.

Also, most women will be focused on their job and kid as they should be. Getting them to go on a date is not easy and the man will have to potentially have a lot of broken ones because of last minute scheduling problems or emergencies the kid may have. Plus, it isn't healthy to give a kid an insight to a revolving door of potential dads just for them not to work out.

[D_Bone_Steak]

I think what is unattractive is getting involved in a relationship that comes with little people created by other men and a dog, being expected to support all of them, and then getting treated as less important than any of them... including the dog.

See she's had her "fun" and now she's ready to be "serious?" So this magical guy is supposed to have just been working his ass off, gets with her, and he's just not interested in having any fun of his own. Expected to go from serious to more serious. No "fun" or random kids for no reason from him... probably not even allowed to bring his own dog.

I know women don't like to imagine it, but sometimes the men just want to have fun too... or at least some fun of their own. A woman strapped down with kids and responsibilities that all come from her own "fun" just doesn't look all that appealing compared to the other options you have in front of you, if you're that perfect fantasy of a man.

That perfect man is a fantasy for women who have been spreading their legs for dudes who have no intention of putting up with her in the long run. I mean... if I'm the 50 Shades guy or the vampire guy with big hair... I'm not going to be fucking around with the plain Jain mid-aged introvert with problems. I have my own fantasies to live. My fantasies include midgets and cocaine.

[RoοstеrBrеаst]

Obscene desires, I must admit,
Pervade my mind with every hit,
Of the intoxicating drug, cocaine,
And the wild pleasures that it contains.
But alas, the fantasy of midgets,
Dancing naked, without any limits,
In a sea of lust and sinful habits,
Is something only the brave admits.
I know my thoughts may seem quite vile,
To those who seek a life more mild,
But I am a man who loves to defile,
And to me, that's a life worthwhile.
So, let me indulge in my perverse dreams,
And satisfy my carnal needs,
For it's better to live with obscenity,
Than to die with a life of piety.

It's not just the children, nor the dog,
That make a woman unattractive,
It's the baggage, that comes along,
With her past, and expectations, so destructive.

A man wants to have fun and be free,
Not tied down by someone else's mess,
He wants to enjoy life, as it should be,
Without the stress, and the constant distress.

Biologically speaking, it's true,
Men aren't wired to care for another's brood,
Their hormones and bosoms, aren't made for you,
To form emotional bonds with, or give food.

For a man, his seed is precious and rare,
A biological instinct, that's hard to bear,
So when it comes to raising someone else's child,
His reluctance, is quite understandable, mild.

How many are grossed out, by their own shart and cum,
Let alone another man's, they'd rather be numb,
To the idea of raising, someone else's offspring,
It's just not something, that they would ever bring.

So, don't be offended, if a man isn't keen,
On being with you, and your family scene,
It's just biology, that's hard to control,
And nothing to do, with your heart or soul.

[D_Bone_Steak]

@RoοstеrBrеаst These poems always inspire me. Even when I don't leave with a MHO, one of these was reward enough.

[Реrverted_Сreeр]

Rooster was murdered. As was a new female user named BoobSlayeress.

[D_Bone_Steak]

@Реrverted_Сreeр Damn... I disappear for a week and all that happens?

[FellowTraveler]

A single mother with children doesn't make the woman unattractive. It makes her darn nearly 'impossible'. Giving birth and raising children is a time consuming 24/7/365 commitment. And the more children she has under her roof, the more her leisure time is gone - baby - gone. Couple that with ONCE the child/children/flock realize that there is someone else gunning for mama's affections, they will actively do what they can to sabotage any relationship. I've had it happen to me, and witnessed it with my guy friends OVER and OVER -ad nauseum! The last relationship was with a very well educated, quite successful woman who permitted her full grown, middle aged daughter to play her something terrible.

Let me explain. Her daughter gave birth to a child when quite young. The girlfriend took in and raised her own grandson. Nice young man (now 17) with a good head on his shoulders, and yet the girlfriend claimed she was an empty nester. Then after I met her and the revelation that the girlfriend was NOT an empty nester, she then permits the daughter and verbally abusive son-in-law with infant in tow to move into her master bedroom WHILE she has her garage converted into a 'grandma suite'. This was all at the behest of her daughter. The girlfriend's other children, successful in their own right; no matter how many times they were invited would not visit the girlfriend, their mother - at her home. This was the clue that had me thinking that what was being said WAS NOT what was put into practice.

So IF she has a child, or children, boyfriend beware!

[Mamaliv]

I have found that a lot of men have this idea that single women with children are damaged goods. I do not agree with this assumption. Unfortunately there are plenty of single mothers that have ran the father of their children through the coals and taken them for everything they have. Some woman are looking for a man to help raise their children. BUT not all single mothers are like this, we’re just stuck with the labels and stigma. I’ve had men that wouldn’t date me because I am a single mother, but I’m at a point in my life that I don’t care, apparently we’re not compatible. I don’t depend on my ex or anyone for anything. I work hard, pay my bills, have my own home and truck. I’d only like to find a man that can be my partner in crime, someone I can free up with and enjoy life, unfortunately some men aren’t willing to see all points of view because a few loud mouth bitches ruined it for the few of us good women. Their loss.

[Bobbysworld]

Well said

[Guardian45]

While I have had my share of bad experiences, I NEVER refused to date a single Mom! In fact, some of my BEST relationships have been with single Moms! They make GREAT Partners-in-Crime!

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

I agree with you but in an ideal scenario guys prefer young girls 18-22, low body count, no trauma so on girls who 25 plus have more trauma thats also reason. U might be amazing but what's attractive to you isn't attractive to men u understand u might think strong independent women but guys don't prefer that unless they're broke that different in men n women preferences

[Mamaliv]

@SUMAIREBRAHIM So basically men are just as delusional as women and we’re all just looking for unicorns that don’t exist. It’s pretty sad that we’re so quick to assume that someones past defines them. I know it’s pointless, I just wish people would be more open minded and honest cause at the end of the day we’re all just a little damaged. I’d rather sit down and have a conversation with someone with scars then someone whose lives their life in a bubble.

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

I said the ideal scenario and again yes men and women are different and have different perspectives as women care about the future in relationships and guys care about the past, it's that simple it's basic biology 🧫 but because of social media people are clueless because there is no one telling them truth

[ronaldo75]

My opinion is that single fathers and men with kids have no right to reject single mothers or talk shit about them. However, men without kids have all the right not to want to bring that burden on ourselves. I've always said I'm going to have my first child with a WIFE, and thank god at 41 I've managed to not have kids outside marriage or battle with romantic feelings towards a single mother.

[Guardian45]

@SUMAIREBRAHIM. You DON'T speak for ALL men, nor do I think for the majority. Certainly NOT for me!

[DarkLegacy]

They are

[DextroShade]

And if you found your partner in crime, at dome point you are going to expect him to pay for your kids while not allowing him to discipline them. If you find a single dad and make a blended family it's cool, but for a childless man it's a massive L.

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

@guardian45 most men think that way I'm talking about generalities ask any guy with options they will tell you

[Randogirl491]

Most men and to be honest most women too who aren't older/divorced parents don't like it when a potential partner, especially a woman already has kids. There are misogynistic reasons but plenty of valid reasons too. Men get a better pass as they often aren't he primary caretaker of their kids but still. I would actually be very wary of a man who acts super supportive and accepting of it, there's chances that he wants to prey on the kids. Be especially wary if you have a preteen/teen girl. Too many horror stories involving "awesome supportive step dads 🤪" out there. It's not impossible for them to find a childless partner but still, the best bet for single parents is to date other single parents/ parents who have already grown kids.

[Bobbysworld]

Agreed I'm sure that's the most difficult part. Bringing someone to their kids

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

The answer is guys don't prefer I like what you said but we don't work and think like women we have different perspectives on life basically

[ronaldo75]

Plenty of women dont want single fathers or weekend fathers for the same exact reasons you call "misogynist" and even more pathetic reasons like not wanting a man who pays child support (less money for the women to drain out of him)

[DarkWinterNights]

Less attractive? No. Significantly more drama, prior relationship baggage, and risk- especially when it comes to possible child support payments for children that aren’t even yours is the issue.



A friend of mine recently got divorced and got involved with a very attractive woman with 2 kids, who lived with her ex and he has so far spent thousands moving her, getting her a new vehicle, paying for her kids and then paying for her to go on vacation after her got fired from her job for not showing up for a week. Are all single mothers bad people who exploit their potential partners? Of course not, but there are enough out there to consistently taint peoples opinions.

[Giddyup]

This depends a lot on the guys situation. If your dealing with a single guy that has no kids and maybe never been married, children will be complicated for most, attraction or not.

If the guy is widowed or divorced with children, then a woman with kids might be comfortable to him. As a divorced guy with children, I've learned that women in a similar situation seem to understand me more and I also understand them more.

It's just an example of relating to life's circumstances. I know when single attractive women see me with one of my daughters, I might not get the same glances than if I was solo.

[magiusX26]

there are some attracted to such, but many more do find it as a turn off. so yes it lowers a womanxs chances at a meaningful and commited relationship. mind you, there can be circumstances that mitigate that a little such as the father met a tragic end being why she is not with him anymore, or he walked out suddenly (not as mitigating as the tragic ending though) and the father's history matters some in the tragic ending too. for example, his ending happened because of him being involved in sonetging shady such as a drug deal gone bad means less than say he was hit by a drunk driver on his way home from work. sorry but it goes towards her character the man/men she chooses, and if her choice is a less than societally desirable partner, it deminishes her character. also it gets worse the more children she hasn especially if there are multiple fathers.

[HighValue]

Yes. A woman having kids from past relationships makes her MUCH less desirable as a partner/mate.

From what I have seen IRL is that the majority of single mothers are bad people and not good to be in a relationship with or friends with. It is best for quality men to avoid them.

[monorprise]

Yes in general, depending upon how she became single. If the father is still alive, then you have to figure out why he isn't raising HIS kids.

Either way he's a problem, and if she had anything to do with it she might be an even bigger problem.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Attractive she is & attractive she will always be & although she has kids or a kid less attractive she won’t be however less appealing she could be.

[lightbulb27]

no and I'd wonder how the women see a single guy with kids... because there are two parents.

but some guys at that age range don't want to take on kids. some might. reduces the options probably.

time to make a "brady bunch"...

[Miristheiss]

I would never have dated a woman who had kids.

The only kids in my life were going to be the ones I had with my wife after we'd married and dated a long time.

I was never going to be with a woman who already had some other guys kids and to where there was ZERO honeymoon phase of just her and I lost in each other and spontaneous all the time. I wanted a hot, fun, wife. Not a mom.

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

I'm gonna be honest... yes single mother aren't attractive (don't prefer that lebal) guys in general don't prefer someone else kids I know this sounds rude but I'm just being honest, I'm telling things what exactly guys feel and think.(no offence intended)

[LiamJHayden]

Not less attractive necessarily, but the reality is that most guys who do not have kids of their own will take a pass on a single mom.

I do not limit myself so completely. I have dated single mothers in the past, but I do have one pretty strict preference in this. No baby daddy drama! Dad not in the picture (abandoned family or passed away).

[Marklaw12]

Not necessarily.

What makes her unattractive is her still seeing her ex-partner. It makes the current relationship uncomfortable.

He will look at me as taking his sloppy seconds without even uttering a word.

However, you can make it work by setting times when he can come visit. Its gotta be strict and when we have disagreements, don't go telling him or rather running into his arms

[Mamaliv]

That’s just disturbing, the only thing I have to do with the father of my children is when were discussing our children or dropping them off/picking them up. I do not discuss anything with my ex husband about what is or is not going on in my life, he is a pig and if it wasn’t for our children I’d have absolutely nothing to do with him. But for our children I am civil.

[Marklaw12]

That's the best attitude a man who wants you can ask for. It's already difficult dealing with kids that aren't his then having to deal with an ex.

Also, what if your new man wants kids too? Are you ready for that?

[Mamaliv]

If he wants kids then I can’t be his. I no longer have a uterus so I won’t be able to give a man babies, so I’ll wish him luck!

[Marklaw12]

So far you're upfront from the start before it gets serious. Well, you know it goes

[Mamaliv]

Yes, I’m upfront. I want to find my person not lead some one on to believe I can give them something I can not. I’m very forward about who I am and wasting my time or someone else’s is not something I’m interested in.

[Marklaw12]

Then you're a winner. Good luck on the dating scene

[Mamaliv]

Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Yes.

Yes.

And yes.

Not just “less attractive” but “not even worth considering.” Why bother when you can find some other woman without kids? There are plenty of fish in the sea so why pursue one with children? Even if she’s smoking hot. Great. They get to be around your kid for the next 10-13 years... minimum.

Yay.

[Honest-Matt]

Honestly, yeah but only to younger boys at least in the terms of meaningful long term relationships. Moms otherwise are fun and hot for all ages of men, but relationship side of it, is definitely a mature man's game.

[Slim57]

Yeah, shows she picks loser men, if the spouse didn't pass away, especially if multiple from different men, most men, or women, don't want to raise someone else's kid or have someone else's kid take time away out of dating someone, but not to worry, I don't know why so many single mothers care, because there are plenty of men out there proud to have someone else's sloppy seconds, so

[NotInterestedSorry]

What happens if she didn't pick a loser but they just weren't in love anymore so decided to separate?
Look at actress Demi Moore she was married to Bruce Willis and had 3 daughter with him but their marriage ended and she became a single mum but Demi and Bruce remained good friends all these years after their divorce