Balding guy at 20, what may I do to compensate for this flaw?

[Anonymous]

Let's keep this superficial... cause we all know looks are crucial at 20 yo.

[dynamicyandere]

Just shave your head. Own it.


And then, workout, exercise, get buff.


What’s 100% more unattractive than baldness is insecurity.


By owning your baldness, by showing the world you don’t give a f*ck about your baldness, by embracing it, it’s an opportunity to show how confident you are despite having a bald head.


Just like short guys who are good with ladies — they may be short, but they are absolutely brimming with confidence.


The short guys that have trouble with women are the ones who are insecure about their height.


And it’s the same with baldness.


The ones who have no issues dating women are those who aren’t insecure about it. They own it.


So to recap:


The most important thing you need is confidence and to not be insecure about your baldness.


The secondary thing is to work out, get buff, so that you can enhance your overall physique, as there are plenty of attractive guys who have shaved heads and athletic physiques.

[molonski2]

I had this issue mid 20s , its interesting because what seems like a huge deal now ( and I appreciate the question having been there ) , firstly shave it off , be fully shaved and proud , now when I did this it was not socially acceptable , it was considered you wanted to look like a thug , or a hit man , but completely acceptable now.

Keep fit and workout , you may already be doing this , but really go for it , you will thank yourself , and include diet into this exercise , this is an obvious one.

The toughest thing for me , was converting from a young " surfer boy " with blonde hair , that women loved , into this different form , but both were good , the vast majority of it was in my own head as my look evolved , and I became actually more popular if anything , never had an issue.

Now , the obvious one from here after we have done all of the above is presentation , really try and keep it cool , create your own look , copy but keep it a little unique , season dependent , match hats , but make them part of the outfit , but be sure to take them off confidently , and put back on , you are not hiding anything , you are co ordinating.

Remember , our confidence comes from within , create the real you , and dont let others ( nearly always other men ) put you down , because my creating something unique you will have a massive advantage , and remember this age is the toughest , its only going to get better and better , remember the colours , and the look , plus the hats , match them all , shave it off and go , go , go.

Really wishing you well , but you don't need my wishes , you will be fine , I've been shaving my head now for 35 years , and the last thing I'd want now is a mop of grey hair.

[AmandaYVR]

Hats are fun. I love hats. Great way to show some personality and style.

You have to try to not be uncomfortable with yourself, because that's what makes others comfortable. There are people with disfigured faces, one arm, and all sorts of disabilities both physical and mental, yet generally speaking, we carry on.

I used to hate how often I would bump into my next door neighbour when I went to go throw the trash out. There she was, quiet, not saying a word. It was so awkward. I wouldn't have makeup on and my hair was messy, and she was always unfriendly. But I decided it was worse to be seen as unfriendly (like her), and vain, so I acted like I didn't care how I looked. (She never got warmer, tbh, which doesn't help my story, exactly, lol.) But nonetheless, we all have weaknesses and flaws and imperfections, but we are not defined by them. We have to prioritize the positives. That's the only way to not be miserable.

And wear hats. And find a cool hairstylist. They're expert in these matters.

[Tomisworthless]

Yeah but those are hot guys with style what about ugly insecure guys w no dress style

[AmandaYVR]

@Tomisworthless You're missing the point. Think of people as a blank slate which they can decorate. There are endless possibilities for how to dress, and everyone gets to choose that. (Cost is an issue, and getting around that will take some effort, strategy and planning.) Anyone can learn how to dress well, look good or interesting. And if you have absolutely no clue where to start, go to some clothing stores you like and just get a cute sales girl to help. Just go up and say, "Help me, I'm ignorant lol". It's what they do for a living.

The reason I made these suggestions is because it's a main principle of design - when you have elements you don't like and can't remove, you distract from them by adding interesting or aesthetically appealing things around them.

Asker, you're worried about your face and hair. But you said you do work out, and there's pretty much no female alive who doesn't like a nice strong chest on a guy. That is not something to act like it's irrelevant. Not only does it make a guy look better/good, it also means he has muscles/strength, and could be handy. There's a reason there's a beloved trope in romance stories - lift something, fix something, save something.
You feel defeated already, but everyone has issues. If you continuing working out, buy some cool hats, and some great sunglasses (I recommend aviators - they are the most commonly flattering style on all face shapes), and dress well, and don't act like you're a walking ball of insecurity, you will have a decent life!

[Tomisworthless]

no iget the point just things work better than others you dont want to come off as a tryhard that would just get yoou more negative comments

[AmandaYVR]

@Tomisworthless Ok, I see. Yeah, I think that's a common sentiment with guys. You might see each other like that, but we females don't, I think. To us, fashion and wardrobes have always been embedded in our self-expression. Obviously with much wider latitude - colours, patterns, feminine dresses and skirts vs. pants, etc. We have the gamut, right.
But I'd encourage you to try to imagine you through our eyes. We don't think you guys look gay or effeminate, or are tryhards. We generally really appreciate having nice outfits to look at. It's really very simple on our end. We take more risks, and we like to see guys being playful, too.
You can learn to develop your own style. But, honestly, most of the clothing in men's stores is very subdued. It's pretty rare that a bold colour or print is there.
It's really so easy to keep it simple. (A tautology? lol) Think a great fitting pair of jeans, with a cool graphic 't' that expresses some interest of yours. Then you layer. Accessorize.
Then have a good walk. If you're listening to some music you love, a bit of strut down the street, in a cool outfit, everything else fades away. You now have a persona. And chicks are attracted to that.
I'm not saying that's necessarily going to translate in them approaching you (they're totally chicken), but if you start noticing some heads turning, it might, over time, build your confidence, so that when some situation does finally present itself, you might feel better about yourself.
Then get good with the art of conversation. Words matter to girls. A lot.

[Tomisworthless]

women are fake nice to each other due to strength and safety in numbers but can be truly vile to men they see as weak and inferior such as myself. Me and the female sex dont get along I hold too much resentment towards your gender

[Tomisworthless]

women feel quite masculine around me and feell comfortable to express what they think of me without any repercussion

[AmandaYVR]

@Tomisworthless I would have been empathetic to that but your username shows that you have major self-esteem issues and you demean yourself.

[Tomisworthless]

id say im rather realistic in my self analysis my worth is assigned to me by others. If others treat you poorly and nobody wants anything to do with you then that is your value. I believe trash is treated as such and thank you i was not looking for empathy or sympathy. I was simply explaining how its not so cut and dry as youd like to think. You should never carry yourself or dress outside your worth. Have a good day now.

[Screenwriter]

I had a 19 year old friend who was balding when we were that age. Though hair might be an important "asset" it's not a personality flaw. The reason you're balding is due to inheritance and genetics. There must be men in your family who lost their hair early, and they survived.

Do you have a good sense of humor? A brain? Attractive face? Body? Focus on what you DO have, not on what you don't. And as fair as necessities go, hair doesn't give you As on college tests, doesn't get you a job, can't fix a car, clean a house or cook a meal. Hair doesn't take care of your kids or pay your bills or wash the clothes or plant a garden. Doesn't read bedtime stories or sing songs.

It's just window dressing. 1/3 of men significantly lose it before age 40.

Revel in who you are and all the positive things you do. Find a look that works for you. Shave it off, or keep what's on the sides and back while you have it, and don't base feelings about yourself on hair.

[Asker]

I do have an attractive body and i'm pretty tall, but face is the basis of attraction. You can change you body, get muscles, lose fat... you can't change your face, and that's an indicator of good genes. Body is secondary, the face isn't. Notice plus size models, or curvy models... most of them have model faces. It's like telling a bald guy "hey, look at Jason Statham, Bruce Willis or Jeremy Meeks!" Yeah, sure... they're famous, rich and, especially, hot men. Their faces are masculine: their jawlines are masculine, they have good eyes, charming smiles, incredible physiques. They don't represent the average bald guy, as curvy models don't represent the average curvy woman.

Also, losing hair at 20 isn't the same as losing your hair at 30. There's a confidence issue that needs to be taken in account. It surely crushes your self esteem in both cases, but the first one is surrounded by hairy dudes and girls who (rightly) take for granted guys at 20 have hair, while the second one is surrounded by more bald guys and SOME women who accepted that look. So, the 30 yo guy will surely have way more chances than the 20 yo guy. That breaks confidence if you're the 20 yo guy.

I appreciated the comment by the way!

[Screenwriter]

Do the best with what you have and be confident in what you have. That's all I can say. My friend John was hilarious, sharp and wonderful. I don't think he ever thought about his lack of hair, because, in the scope of things, with all his assets, his balding at 19 was a "so what."

Create a mantra for yourself. "My lack of hair does not break my confidence." Start this now.

Bruce Willis is average-looking at best. Great acting personality, though. Jason Statham is an action actor, but ugly as mud, facially, and truthfully, has little acting talent. Though Meeks is pretty, he's a criminal!

On the other hand The Rock is a beautiful man, big, strong, lovely smile and voice and a decent actor. Woody Harrelson is longtime bald man. Adorable face and great comic timing. Though Sean Connery was kind of a sexist asshole, he was a fine actor. Michael Clarke Duncan, of "The Green Mile," huge voice and body, sweet, sexy, and a fine actor. Mark Strong, Brit, who swung a broadsword with James Franco in "Tristan and Isolde." Hot, hot hot! Wonderful actor, too. I LOVE love love, Stanley Tucci. Wonderful as the ex-pat professor in "Captain America," and as the husband of Julia Child in "Julia and Me," if I recall the name correctly. I'm a movie nerd. Don't get me going!!!

I don't think any of these men who are all quite bald have confidence problems. They are all incredibly talented... and have nothing to reproach themselves for. You can't fight genetics and biology. Make your peace with it and work around it.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

It’s okay. Half of the men’s population is bald. No worries. I promise girls will still want you. Just Shave your head.

[Asker]

although i like sweet lies, harsh truths are more helpful. You gotta have the face for that style... but i'd love to believe being bald at 20 isn't that bad

[Tomisworthless]

Shave your head and spread the Gospel

[davado88]

i think comb overs are retro cool, id go that way

[coachTanthony]

I have been shaving my head bald since I was 26. Slap a goat tee on there and now you are a cut above the rest. Women either like full bald heads or a man who has a great head of hair.

[nastyb]

I love how dumb men think... if 1 man look good with a bald head then they think it means ALL men look good bald.

[coachTanthony]

No we don’t we’re saying at least give it a shot and see how it looks before doing anything drastic

[Asker]

@nastyb yeah i surely won't look that great bald. The fact that i have a good physique and tall won't solve it... you gotta have the face for that style, and i guess accepting this isn' going to be easy... but surely hair transplant wouldn't solve anything. By shaving my head, i'll probably be below averageness but i wasn't attractive neither before

[coachTanthony]

Probably is the key word there. Most men don't even bother because they assume. I suggest just try it first.

[AviatorTom]

Don't treat it as a flaw, treat it as a benefit. Many women love bald guys.

[Asker]

women, sure. Girls? doubt that

[Jaximus-Lion]

Own it! I started loosing my hair when i was 17, tried to make it look good until i was 22 and i am bald (clean razor shave) since then. Nothing changes on the attraction side, i never had problems with dating, it was all empty thoughts in my head, many girls/women thinks bald men are more sexier that men with hair. It will take few years to feel comfortable with it. Do not get hair barbie planting, it looks stupid and it's expensive too. Be like MIKE, Walter White, Bruce Willis and Dwayne Johnson.

[Asker]

you never had problems with dating? That's good to hear and i'm happy for you!

[Jaximus-Lion]

it's all in your head... am not saying this because i am bald but i had my own thoughts on but it turned all wrong.

[WhereIsMyMind]

If it bothers you that much, have you considered getting one of those non-surgical hair systems? I've seen videos of men having them done, they look fantastic. They cost a few hundred I think, but could be worth saving the money back for.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/gUutre5iKIM

[EmyyWolf]

Micropigmentation

That can give you a soldier-cut look.

HAIT TRANSPLANT.

it takes longer and actually grows your hair.

[JustMeQ2]

Just shave it. You will look much better than with patches of hair. (no Mather how bad you think you look bald)


I went through the same thing (balding before 21y), and started to shave it at 25 only regret not doing it sooner.


As for the women, I treat this as a filter for them. And it’s also fair game for me because I have some things I don’t find attractive in a woman that they can’t control. (as most people have)

[sage2021]

I don't mean to be so serious here, but have you ever thought you may have a medical condition causing your hair to fall out?
I knew a guy that went bald at age 18. Besides that, his testicles were as small as almonds. The other thing is he couldn't produce any children. He orange had no seeds.
There is a condition called hypergonadism.

[catarecute]

you could eat garlic as it has been shown to cure baldness, there are also treatments (pharmaceutical) or you could get your hair cloned.

to be honest looking at natural remedies is a good idea. its cheap and has no side effect. also stress increases hair loss so don't get stressed.

[jshm2]

You don't. As you are the genetic flaw, that must not be allowed to breed at any cost.

You need to become a priest and take up celibacy, else be beaten and thrown into a river, wearing concrete shoes.

The bald gene must be eliminated.

[rigmarole]

What were you growing your hair like an alpaca to supply a sweater factory as your primary source of income? What’s the big deal? Just shave your head sissy.

[Asker]

That would actually be a great idea. Imma start a billionaire business

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Work out. That's the failsafe answer to baldness. My hairs been thinning. Doctor said I need to chill or it might not be reversable. Been spending more time in the gym. If your fit, they'll want to touch it.

[Jdodkfndosn]

I'm not sure about that one. Your testosterone is either used or converted to estradiol or dihedraltestosterone. The amount converted to each depends on many other things but it's the DHT that causes you to go bald. If you workout, you. could increase your testosterone but you'll likely just be converting even more T to DHT. The best thing for him would be to ask his doctor about finastoride, which is pretty cheap, and blocks the conversion to DHT.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

@Jdodkfndosn I'm no authority on this. I'm still learning about this stuff myself. But so far as I can tell, the whole dht thing is still mostly just a theory because there are all different types of reasons hair loss can occur. Mine started after an incredibly stressful part of my life and I've had other symptoms.

My theory with working out (and I'm not the only one who's come to this conclusion) is that the increased blood flow from high intensity cardio might actually help hair grow back. The follicles die from decreased blood flow. DHT overabundance and hair loss definitely seem like they're connected but common sense says the DHT shouldn't be causing hair loss unless there's some kind of hormonal imbalance.

I haven't gotten to research enough to get past the comment sense part yet 😂 but maybe if I get my hair full again I'll do a my take about it.

[Rei13]

Just accept you’re going bald and either shave it all off or get surgery to replace your hair. Shaving it would be less expensive and can still be attractive

[Asker]

i'm probably not willing to get a hair transplant... but i got to admit i'd look horrible without hair too.

[ta-ra]

You could get hair implants, ik a guy who did it at 18 worked brilliantly.

Or shave your head, some men look amazing like that.

[Sonorous]

‎‎‎‎‎

https://www.youtube.com/embed/U-3hbwJ6CX4https://www.youtube.com/embed/jHRuuRXi07s

[Tstrbrainer]

In the long term, a good career, personality and a healthy body would help you a lot.

Also it goes without saying that you might need to get some treatment it it bothers you that much.

Also, don't overthink about how attractive you are to the opposite gender

[sunflower00]

Shave your head in my opinion! And generally just be a good person who is open and friendly.


But mostly just do whatever you’re comfortable with

[DubiousIntentions]

Embrace it! A lot of stars like a shaved head even though they have hair. Some even look better without hair in fact. Bruce Willis, The Rock, Shemar Moore, Vin Diesel just to name a few.

[andreasderjuengere]

Put on a wig and run for President once you're old enough :)

It works for other (s) - so it'll work for you.

Practically - accept yourself as is and let your other traits shine brighter.

People are not made of hair only.

[ProbablyClueless]

Buff up, my dude. Also, don't worry about going bald; especially if you can grow a beard. Women LOVE that look.