Men tell me I’m beautiful and awesome , and are genuinely confused when I tell them that I’m not dating or married. But they never ask me out. Wtf?

[Anonymous]

For the past few years this has been my experience. I started assuming they were just shy, so I’d share my interest and ask them out. It usually ends with “I’m just a regular guy , I’m sure you could have such and such” . Sir, wtf? lol. Where do the men who are actually interested in relationships hang out lol.

[Anonymous]

I see a lot of women that I think are very attractive but that doesn't mean I think it's worth the time, energy, expense, potential drama, and loss of freedom a relationship may, or may not bring. The question I always ask myself is 'Is she more attractive than 100% freedom?'. Thus being beautiful and awesome are not enough...

[Asker]

If someone has those concerns about relationships, that’s fine and valid. But if a man goes out of his way to (1) tell me that I’m awesome and beautiful and (2) proceeds tell me that he doesn’t understand why I’m not dating or married and should be , then I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t have those concerns. Why be concerned with my love life if you think it may not be worth your time? It’s totally fine for these men to keep some comments to themselves lol , it’ll keep things less confusing.

Men who don’t seem to be interested in relationships tell me I’m attractive all the time and then they keep it moving. No harm no foul

[Avicenna]

Well, I guess they believe that they are "out of your league"

[Asker]

Perhaps so

[Guido]

They think you are out if their league. It's up to you to convince them that they are what you want if that is what you want.

Not all but generally very beautiful people are self absorbed and think they are better than most and a lot of men believe that so they do not bother wasting their time on women they perceive to be in that category.

[Asker]

I hear you. I used to try to convince them , but it became draining and sad. I can no longer convince anyone to see anything they don’t want to see Lol. To get along with someone so wonderfully that you also happen to be attracted to , and then decide not to pursue because of some insecurity you have can be hurtful to both parties in that dynamic.

[Asker]

And honestly I think that when men find out I’m not the least bit self absorbed, it makes them even more afraid to talk to me 🫠😂. But I will continue to be patient and open! Thanks for sharing !

[Darklydarkened]

I've read some articles about men finding relationships too much trouble to bother in US.

Maybe they just think that even if they ask you out, it would cost a lot, and they will feel unfulfilled in return

[Asker]

Maybe , but they’d be projecting what that think I want and who they think I am instead of just asking me. and they tell me I’m “awesome” because of how kind and supportive I am. I’m not out to get anyone’s money. I just want to grow and build with someone and love on them ❤️

[Darklydarkened]

Well, don't pay too much mind to words. As George R. R. Martin aptly puts, words are wind.

They may call you ''awesome'' and it doesn't have to mean anything

[Asker]

“Words are wind” . I love it ! Thanks !

[bededazzle]

don’t rely on feedback from them. chat up people that interest you. make the move if need be.

[Asker]

I do !

[BourbonAndBacon]

Sounds like they are just being nice. Their words don't line up with their actions

[Asker]

I suppose so. It’s just weird to go out of your way to get my attention , and when I respond in kind , they act like they’ve seen a ghost 😂

[Jmmmfi4]

I THINK GUYS ARE JUST BAD AT APPROACHING GIRLS... I KNOW I AM

[Asker]

I get that. It’s totally nerve-racking putting yourself out there.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Well that's just stupid

[Asker]

Tell me about it lol

[ChicoFromThe305]

So how often does that happen? 😂

[Asker]

More frequent than I’d like it to. 😂. But I’m remaining optimistic!

[ChicoFromThe305]

You hold on anon, I'm sure you'll find someone that will eventually back what they say ha

[Asker]

❤️🙏