My boyfriend of four years doesn’t post me even though he knows that it would make me feel special should I be worried?

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

He never posts anything anymore and everytime that I ask him why he doesn’t post me he claims that it’s cringy or that he just doesn’t like to so he ends up never doing it. Back then I would get mad and he would end up posting me but now he just refuses to and I’ve been wondering if it’s because of my weight gain and he doesn’t want to get roasted by his friends or something. by the way I am not super obese or anything like that and he could just post my face if he didn’t want to show my body. He has many selfies of me. He doesn’t want to post me or put me as his wallpaper like he used to do. Maybe he loves me less and is embarrassed of me? I keep feeling like he is embarrassed of me and I feel like him not posting me makes it seem like he’s hiding something.

Updates

1 mo

by the way I know people here are going to be mean to me and say things but I am just a worried girlfriend.

Updates

1 mo

I just talked to him telling him that it would make me feel special if he posted me and that if i was the most special thing to him why doesn’t he show me off? And he just gave me a brief answer saying “Because I don’t like showing off”

[TommyMountainFigure]

I'm sorry but I think you're wrong here. I don't think this has anything to do with him posting at all.

You say in your question you have put weight on, therefore you are feeling insecure in your relationship and want approval that he still wants you!

It isn't fair on him to make those demands. Everyone has a choice. If you feel insecure about your weight, do something about it, don't put the onus on him to have to show he is ok with it!

[JGoesToTown]

Maybe, and just maybe... if he doesn't post anything., its the fact he... doesn't post anything. Im sick of socials as well. I can completely understand the reasoning behind going offline, keeping it just as a communication app. Why do you care os much anywaz?

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

I’ll just try not to care

[JGoesToTown]

I mean, you pretty much dont have any other options. Hog him about it, and he will be angry. You won't solve a thing.
Force it on him, and you are controlling...

I would advise... think about why you have the need for him to post that stuff in the first place.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

I guess maybe I thought he was ashamed of me

[sheikalana]

You seem insecure. Me and my Husband never posted each other on social media and we're married now and we still don't post each other. Our relationship is too precious for me to show it off. Everyone knows I'm married and everyone knows he's married is not something that we hide from anyone we just find it pointless is not gonna add anything good to our marriage. There's too many nosy and jealous people out there.

[Anonymous]

The fact that you’re still a girlfriend (and a worried one) after 4 years should tell you everything you need to know.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

Lol how do you always find my questions 😂

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

I am always worried about everything it’s who I am

[Billlewis]

Do you mean me, or the anonymous woman who just answered your question?

[Opinion Owner]

Did you mean to comment to Bill?

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

The anon I keep getting her on all my questions

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

He’s my soon to be fiance actually he bought the ring and is waiting for it to be delivered

[Opinion Owner]

I’ve never commented on your post. I don’t feel very confident about the ring situation, sounds like he’s not very proud to be in this relationship after so long and no posts of you. Big red flag to me.

[Billlewis]

I hope it's a really nice one;)

[Opinion Owner]

The shut up ring, tiktok will tell you about those.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

It’s not a shut up ring he’s been talking about getting married since we both started dating not me.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

And since when is tiktok a reliable source of information?

[Billlewis]

I know, right?

[Opinion Owner]

I would say it’s a reliable source when it’s thousands of people sharing their own personal experiences. And yes, I’d say it’s a shut up ring after 4 years along with not sharing your photos online. You literally have to address it for it to even possibly happen. I don’t want you to get offended because I’m no way am I trying to make you feel any kind of way. I’m just giving you an unbiased take on how this situation looks to someone who’s not in it. You’re ready to defend it up and down because you love him and love your relationship, which is totally fine. But when you share these things, there are going to be people who view it a way that you might not agree with.

[Opinion Owner]

If anything, take what I say as another perspective and potentially me bringing up factors or points that you haven’t considered. Remember that not everything is mean or rude, some people are just blunt and that’s how I am.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

Thank you. He did post me twice but that was years ago now he doesn’t post me anymore. His friends know who I am apparently but I don't know he just doesn’t post anything at all anymore.

[Opinion Owner]

In my mind, wanting him to post you isn’t necessarily fear of him cheating or anything but a need for reassurance. You say you’re a scared girlfriend, but ask yourself what’s scary exactly. You’ve been with this man for 4 years, without being engaged and for you to have notice from him that a ring is on the way makes me feel like this has come up in conversation and he’s just getting it over with. Because engagements should be a surprise, but you know the ring is coming in the mail… I don't know if I’m making sense, but my point is that there is probably more to it that you are avoiding having to address. Love can’t outweigh logic and you strike me as a person who’s ready to act in her best interest if necessary.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

About the ring I kind of found out about it because he’s too obvious and he got mad lmao I knew that he was planning to propose to me and I knew the exact date so he got mad 😂 he refused to change the date though. Now the ring hasn’t arrived because it’s in India so it’s coming sometime in April and our anniversary is tomorrow 😭

[Princesspeach1411]

Some say that only those who are unhappy will continuously post. Personally, it wouldn’t bother me if a partner didn’t post - the relationship doesn’t hang on whether or not I feature on his social media but more on the other things he does to make me feel loved, safe and appreciated.

[JacobJordan]

You shouldn't be sharing your relationship with everyone. It is a private relationship so why are you inviting everyone to comment on it and tell you and him how to act or feel? He is absolutely right to not want to share relationship stuff publicly you should learn from that. As for setting you as the background that is worth questioning. Just talk to him about it. But you should join him in keeping your private relationship private

[Billlewis]

That's terrible! I think you should have a talk with him about this.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

I have I have gotten mad (in the past) and I repeatedly tell him that it makes me feel bad that he doesn’t post me but he still never does. And he used to have me as his wallpaper when we first started dating but now it’s only sports and a sports field.

[Billlewis]

He sounds like a very selfish guy. Only women should be selfish, in my opinion. I just started following you, and I'd like to invite you to follow me as well if that's alright.

[ISFPCaramelPrincess]

I just talked to him telling him that it would make me feel special if he posted me and that if i was the most special thing to him why doesn’t he show me off? And he just gave me a brief answer saying “Because I don’t like showing off”

[spartan55]

Do any young people understand the concept of privacy when it comes to social media?
No one gives af what you ate for dinner.

[WhitneySnow]

If he’s not posting anything, the fact that he’s not posting you is not a problem. Some guys just don’t like to show off on social media.

[laly520]

showing off is not a big deal n often pointless

he doesn't have to show u off thus it doesn't prove anything but making u feel special

is he posting actively n not posting u or just not a big social media user?

[noohair]

I don't understand social media. It is like pulling your pants down and showing your ass to the world.

[spartan55]

I am going to use this analogy going forward. Perfect.

[zagor]

Post where? Insta? FB? Yeah I don't do social media so you wouldn't like dating me.

[Abdulwahh]

Some guys dont want to show their girls to other men on social media

[boobliker]

dose he post anything