Why are people so concerned about age gaps when dating people?

[Anonymous]

[Finchie40]

Because most people like to try to rub their 2 cents together and think they know what they are talking about , when really they don’t know shit. I have dated younger girls and older girls ‘ that we shared a lot of the same things in common , we both had great chemistry and connection with each other , and both attracted to each other , Age had nothing to do with the chemistry and connection we shared together. I dated younger girls’ that were more mature than girls’ my own age , so I don’t listen to anyone when they talk about age gaps. Most people are just hypocrites about other people , until they meet someone that sweeps them off of their feet with an age gap , and than all of a sudden it’s ok for them to do. So again age really means shit if you meet someone that has great chemistry band connection with you.

[RebelinSteel]

I personally don’t care overly what others think, however for me it comes down to compatibility, which you usually get from people closer to your age, where similar history, similar music tastes and also how we talk as language evolves.
The other bit to bear in mind is socialising with friends, at 30 being with a girl of say 23 is fine, however she will have friends etc that are 18 to 25 say, as a guy having to have a conversation with 18 yr old boys can be hard lol. Then on my side I have friends up to say 40, which now is a large gap to the girl I’m with and socialising can be a pain lol.

It’s important to remember that you are dating a person and also socialising with their friends, both need to work or you put pressure on the relationship. Yes it’s not a huge thing but friends are really important and sometimes more than the person you date.

[DishLady]

Some find that dating outside their comfort range is a nice novelty, but then see that they prefer someone closer to their own age, tastes, sensibilities, etc. Others just aren't comfortable dating outside what they consider an "acceptable" range (whatever that means for them).

I don't think EVERYONE is concerned with age gaps.

[At3mis24]

Age gap is nothing under 15 years between 2 partners; after 15 it will be a bit creepy.

Maturity has nothing to do with it, there are women of 40 stuck in their twenties and girls of 18 too mature, so it's normal to search younger/older partners

[4ngelic]

i think people are only concerned when the younger one is a minor, or 18-24 (particularely more 18-20) and the older person is much older. aside from that i dont think people are concerned, they might think it's really weird or the relationship is sus if a 30yo guy is with a 60yo woman, or a 27yo woman with a 50yo man, but that's about it

[4ngelic]

*misread question sorry

[4ngelic]

i think most people are concerned because it's more the norm to date people the same age, and if there's an age gap it usually comes with a lot of problems. like you not being able to relate to much, being judged and maybe even rejected by others, problems with getting serious because of fertility decline or aging, etc

[NetherlandsNar]

Still it's none of anyone's business if they are 18

[PBandJ_Nerd]

It's because some people want to date those closer to their age instead of older or younger. Another thing is maturity, stage of life, personal development, and life experience. This is what makes age gap relationships kind of tricky, since both aren't at the same or similar level & experience.

[Apple1996]

Age gaps are mainly a issue when someone is very young like under 25 and isn't mentally/emotionally developed yet so it's very easy for a older person to take advantage of them. If both people are past 25/30 then it's not a big deal

[NetherlandsNar]

It's none of your business when everyone is 18

You are a hypocrite too because you like younger men

[Apple1996]

@NetherlandsNar I would never go after a teen. Someone can like younger without being a creep

[NetherlandsNar]

Who cares what you think?

[Anonymous]

And the end of the day what two consenting adults do is really nobody’s business. Sure relatives and parents might be upset occasionally but other people can gtfo with their judgment.

I find that middle aged women are the worst when it comes to judging. But it’s really just depression and jealousy about not getting attention from men anymore.

[At3mis24]

Wtf?

[DarkLegacy]

I find that it is mostly millennial women who have a problem with this, usually because they are jealous of the younger women and are bitter that they have failed to bag the good guy.

They will say things like we are paedos even if we are not or say borderline paedo to try and slander us or scare us into not going with such women. Obviously this will not work of course because no woman controls who we go out with and we will never change our minds because of their slander.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Because grooming is a thing. Didn’t think one needed to spell that out?

[petitedollbabee]

Because in many cases, it can be predatory or grooming. Just because something is ‘legal’ doesn’t make it morally right.

[DarkLegacy]

But it is nobodies else business

[DrPepper12]

True, let's use the coastal definition of legal - 18+ - not Tennessee or similar places where it's like pre pubescent

[NetherlandsNar]

@DarkLegacy exactly

[DarkLegacy]

@NetherlandsNar Just seen other hypocrite women calling us men creepy and predatory over this, it is usually just jealousy. The age of consent is also below 18 in all European countries. Don't worry, it won't make a difference to us liking younger women.

[NetherlandsNar]

@DarkLegacy this site is filled with hypocritical and man hating women

[DarkLegacy]

@NetherlandsNar Yes i know, it is all you get, i hope it is just this site but sadly there is a lot out their in the real world. I know plenty and there are plenty in the UK Parliament

[NetherlandsNar]

@DarkLegacy I haven't met any

[DarkLegacy]

@NetherlandsNar That is good, but i guess people are more honest on social media and especially on a site like this where you are largely anonymous.

[Anonymous]

Because statistics prove that age gaps larger than 9 years the success rate falls off dramatically. The REALITY is the larger the age gap the harder it is to be at the same point in life. And shared experiences are what relationships are all about.

[laly520]

due to societal norms n potential differences in life stages, almost everyone looking for compatibility

[sheikalana]

Because different generation can often clash.

[At3mis24]

No, we are very close with our interests, even if we have an age gap of 14

[genericname85]

because relationships with big age gaps "typcially" go well in the short term but not in the long term. that's why. it's a statistics thing.

[At3mis24]

I'm 41 he's 27 and if I meet him again, I'm sure it will work!! F** your opinion, mind your own business!!

[genericname85]

@At3mis24 i wish people would understand the difference between "probabilities and statistics" and individual lifes. you very obviously do not and take a factual statement as an insult... learn to think.

[Anonymous]

I think it's funny that women prefer older men and men prefer younger women. But only men get the shame for it.

[At3mis24]

I prefer younger men because I don't choose who I love and I look myself younger!

[WhitneySnow]

Power imbalance. Plus some people think it just looks weird.

[At3mis24]

They must mind their own business, those craps!

[WhitneySnow]

I agree

[CrabCakes11]

Because of the power imbalance and different experiences being in different stages of life

[DrPepper12]

Beats me! If there's consent, legality and safety then it's none of my business.

[NetherlandsNar]

It's no ones business really.

People are just judgmental

[loveslongnails]

I'm more concerned about compatibility and practicality.

[jahaims]

With age comes experience. Experience is wisdom and knowledge if you aren't a moron.

[MrDaveAPSI]

It's not supposed to but, that's just how the cookie crumbles

[Xia1994]

For legal reasons and maturity reasons.

[At3mis24]

Maturity is not a good argument!

[Xia1994]

@At3mis24 it is the prefrontal cortex develops at 25 on average but in some cases it develops before then or at a much later age 25-30 and that’s when you get really mature people who are under 25 or really immature people who are under 30 but in most cases it develops by 25 you can even google it.

The prefrontal cortex plays a crucial role in decision-making, impulse control, and planning, all of which are key aspects of maturity. It undergoes significant development during adolescence and continues into early adulthood, contributing to an individual's increasing ability to make informed decisions and regulate their behavior.

[Xia1994]

And the prefrontal cortex is the front part of the brain. 🧠

[At3mis24]

That’s right, but it’s off-topic: it’s not going to affect my tendency to prefer younger men and stay young myself!

[Xia1994]

@At3mis24 I mean it’s your life darling and your doing whatever you want with it. But I definitely wasn’t off topic with my point I answered the asker's question.