Guys aren't super into me even though they asked for my number and say theyre so attracted to me? Im always WAY more excited about them?

[Anonymous]

I've never had a boyfriend or much male attrntion but lately I've been getting more attention. Like guys just aren't excited about me as i am about them. They put in zero effort to see me or engage in good convos over text in the meantime. I've tried online dating and the men i met up with didn't like me if if they seear they were really into me. Told them its ok to say they aren't and we can end things. They say no, i really wanna see you again. Ghosts me right after date.

A guy asked for my number irl for the first time as a customer and I was a cashier. He always said how pretty I am and says he wants to see me. Were both busy with work but we live like 5-10 mins from eachother. He has adult children. He doesn't need to have them on the weekeneds like he says. If he really wanted to see me REALLY bad like how i want to see him, it would have happened already. Guys just aren't eager about me! I don't know if cuz theyre older and jaded and lived life and theyre men, so expectations and pressure are different for them? But im in my mid 20s and even when i was younger i was a super lovey type. The way i feel for guys is just never matched and reciprocated. I act really calm and cool for about 2 weeks, maybe 3, but if its been a month and there's been no effort to hangout or text a lot, you're just not interested no matter what you claim. At least not as much as me. Im sick of this. I never thought id be single at this age, fighting for my life, begging to hang out with men who expressed interest first!

Updates

+1 y

I blocked the guy who asked for my number.

Updates

+1 y

I firmly confronted him in text. He admitted he had no intentions on anything with me. He sorta just asked for my number for no reason at all. He seems daft and emotionless in every response. In the very beginning he had more life so idk…

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa girl, it sounds like you've been really struggling with this whole dating thing! That's super frustrating to constantly get all excited about guys and have them not follow through.

I know it's hard, but try not to take it too personally. Guys can be flaky sometimes without it really being about you. We're not always the best at communicating what we're really thinking and feeling.

With that guy at your work, don't put all your hopes on him just cause he asked for your number. Working retail, guys are always hitting on cashiers - don't mean they really wanna date, you know? And older guys can say lots of nice things just to get attention.

Maybe try not getting too attached so quick next time either. It's good to play it a little cooler at first so you don't end up so disappointed. And don't chase after anyone either - that'll only make em lose interest faster!

Just try to have fun meeting people for now without stressing so much over finding a boyfriend. Someone good will come along eventually if you stay positive. And don't be afraid to make the first move sometimes too if you like a guy. We can be shy too! Hang in there, girl. Your perfect guy is out there somewhere.

[Asker]

It doesn't mean he wanted something serious? Well thats really sad to hear. He probably hits on every cashier he finds attractive. Im so f***ing dumb. Glad i blocked him. I was done waiting and agonizing over him.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, that really sucks. I know it's easy to get your hopes up when a guy is complimenting you like that, but you're probably right that he wasn't looking for anything serious. Some guys will say whatever to try and get a girl's number without actually having real intentions. I wouldn't beat yourself up about it though - we've all been naive about guys before.

It was smart of you to block him after waiting so long without any follow through on his end. You definitely don't need that kind of nonsense making you question where you stand. And you're definitely not dumb - he's the one who's dumb for missing out on how great you seem just to hit on random cashiers. His loss! I'm sure there's much better dudes out there who would commit to taking you out if they were feeling you like this guy claimed.

Try not to let this experience make you too jaded. Just learn from it that you deserve way more effort from anyone you give your time and energy to. Keep your chin up - the right person who treats you with respect will come along soon enough. Just stay focused on yourself and people who really appreciate you for now!