Why does my boyfriend keeps his exes on insta and FB as friends. Even if he doesn’t talk to them (as he says)?

[Anonymous]

I’m shy and can’t ask this to him straight forward , was just hinting these by sarcastic jokes. But he gets offended all the time telling that I hurt his feelings and making him feel guilty even if he didn’t do anything wrong. I felt bad after he saying that. Is this a manipulation?

[BetaBucks]

Guys are kind of oblivious to this thing. They have to experience seeing their girlfriend or wife following an ex on social media to recognize how it looks and feels. But also, take into consideration that guys don't mean anything when they follow an ex, whereas we both know it 100% means something when girls do it.

[Asker]

he just said he doesn’t talk to them but why he’s following. (Some of his exes are married or either in a relationship) but why he needs to have them I wonder if he’s interested in them or what:(
Everything is good between us except of the case when I ask him such things he gets annoyed that’s why I’m anxious to do that :( or he’ll think I’m jealous

[BetaBucks]

I'd say there's a 99% he's not interested and 1% chance he's looking for a hookup from them. If you want to try to address it one last time, send a really soft text saying how it hurts your feelings and you won't ever bring it up again, but are hoping he will unfollow them. If he argues in any way, let it go.

There's also a more manipulative strategy which is to follow your own ex bfs. He may draw the emotional connection when he sees it.

[Asker]

Thank you sm for the answer. But I just don’t know how to bring up this conversation properly. Just waiting for the opportunity. But I’ll be suffering till that

[BetaBucks]

You're welcome, and I hope everything works out okay for you!

[Asker]

We talked by the way. He said that these people are just accumulated there and have many mutual friends. And since they broke up without quarrels and intrigues, therefore he cannot delete them, cuz it’s gonna seem strange. So I don’t know is this a red flag or not

[BetaBucks]

Good to hear you talked about it. Always the important first step. even if he didn't change, at least you made your position clear. I wouldn't call this a full on red flag though. More like something to keep an eye on. Now, if he starts interacting with them, the red flags start flying

[Asker]

Yes you’re right. Thank you🙏🏻 just my boyfriend lives far away. He’s in Mexico. He told me he wants to take me there. And his intentions seem serious. I’m just afraid sometimes that I’ll leave everything here and move with him. And if he does something bad I won’t be able to do anything at that time

[serious]

Well he should not be keeping his exes on insta and FB unless he plans to maintain contact with so he is not doing a very good thing here.

[DishLady]

I get it and that would possibly bother me to if he was some kind of Casanova type, but presuming he’s just a regular Joe I’d say don’t overthink it… they’re just friends.


If you’re with a guy but don’t trust him, don’t stay with him.

[In_Trance]

Small dick energy on both of your parts

[Asker]

So what do you mean? Am I wrong? Or should I break up with him?

[spartan55]

Ya think?

[Asker]

What?

[jahaims]

He is immature

[Asker]

But he’s 36 y o🥲

[jahaims]

You can be 70 and be immature. Maturity is a part of the mindset not age.