“Hear me out, be my girlfriend” or “let’s go on a date”?

[Anonymous]

I want to ask out someone who’s in her mid 20s. She’s very funny, is a goofball, and jokes a lot. This is why I chose the phrases above. I feel they fit our personality and friendship.

With that said, which is the better proposal? I feel like the girlfriend one might come off strong but then there will be no blurred lines. The second phrase is more standard but I don’t want to have to ask her later if she wants to make it official. Thoughts?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that's a good question man. It's always tough figuring out how direct to be with this stuff.

I think leading with "let's go on a date" is the safer play here since you're just starting out. Calling her your girlfriend straight away could be a bit much, even if you're joking around. Gotta ease into it, ya know?

Going on a date leaves it more casual and see how it goes without committing either of you too soon. Then after you chill and have fun, you could feel it out if making it official is what you both want. Like maybe end the date flirty, say you had a great time, and ask if she'd wanna do it again sometime.

But starting as just a date keeps the pressure low. Girls like being pursued a bit. And like you said, she seems cool and funny so having a chill hang first would let you see how you vibe in person too.

Don't overthink it - just ask her out, see where it leads! Good luck my dude, hope she says yes!

[DishLady]

They're very different proposals, Mr. Anon... BE MY girlfriend implies that you know one another well enough for her to be your girlfriend and you know already that she's also interested in you. LET'S GO ON A DATE indicates that you DON'T know each other well yet and haven't been out together... so there's also no reason for you (or her) to leap to BY MY girlfriend...

Ask her out and see what happens, THEN transition to the next thing... Don't be overly eager...

[Anonymous]

Asking someone to be your girlfriend before you’ve even dated would be a guaranteed no. It’s just too forward and quick, plus you don’t know what she has going on in her personal life. I’d say to ask her on a date and then let your intentions be known.