Have you ever asked someone "what do you bring to the table" when on a date?

[KrakenAttackin]

Did the person give you a serious answer?

Yes I have.

No I have not.

[DishLady]

Not on a date, but in coaching someone who was nervously preparing for a date. (He looked like he was about to pass out. I reminded him we’re all just human and to remember what he brings to the table… and told him any girl would be lucky to get to know such a good guy… which seemed to have fallen out of his mind somehow, replaced by the jitters while he was getting ready for this big date.)


He ended up having a good date, though nerves still get him every so often and he has to do a short mental “what I bring to the table” review.

[Laciejordan]

No 🤣 The few "real" dates I've been on, the guy was usually pretty candid about his current situation and his goals, so I really didn't have to ask, nor would I have asked. I appreciated their candidness but at the same time, felt like they thought they had a need to impress me in order for me to be interested in them. I didn't think less of them, I just thought it was unnecessary for a first date.

[sawno]

I wouldn't like that kind of question, ruins the spontaneous dynamic of figuring it out trough natural conversation. I know I have that saying where I say that dates are the same as job interviews because I treat my job interviews like dates. Its about dialogue and figuring out what you both want / need and generally about getting along. Doing it the other way round where you make the date feel like the bad kind of job application wouldn't make me feel my relaxed spontaneous self and you'd get a more corporatized answer.

[Lliam]

No. That would be purely mercenary, transactional attitude, like being concerned about profit and loss.
It would also be insulting, like saying "What good are you?" or "What can you do for me?"

I can assess what a girl brings to the table without being crude about it.

[KrakenAttackin]

@Lliam. I agree. I don't think people really ask this question so all the fake outrage at being asked is hyperbole.

[Lliam]

Thanks for the MHO, brother.

[KrakenAttackin]

You bet, great post.

[Finchie40]

Not at all , that sounds pretty pathetic to be honest with you , if I asked a girl that question? already know there wouldn’t be a second date period lol I would just politely ask her what she does for a living or what hobbies is she into etc. if a girl asked me what do I bring to the table? I would say absolutely nothing that’s why I am here on a date with you so you can support me , I take it you are paying the bill as well.

[Avicenna]

I wouldn't ask that question because there is no need to. To me, it sounds like a question that is more appropriate for a business negotiation or perhaps a job interview, not a date. And, besides, on the date I'm getting to know her and figuring out for myself whether I think she is what I'm looking for in a girlfriend. Her answer to such a question may anyhow not be honest or she may not even know.

[Wallythewalrus2]

I did ask a girl that knew all about me a question similar to that on our first date. I said, "You know basically everything about me, so I'd like to know something about you. For example, do you have any extremely rich family members, nearing death, that would leave you a large sum of money when they die"? She started laughing but I kept a very straight face! She stopped laughing, looked at me with a very serious face and said, "I really hope you're joking but I don't think you are". Of course I was joking. She did say, if I was serious, she would have left. I can be a dick at times but she got used to it! We've been married for five years.

[Laciejordan]

Humor can be a double edged sword. Most girls love a good sense of humor but some can take it too far! You, Mr. Walrus, seem to walk that fine line quite often. 🤣

[avery58]

No cause it's a date not a job interview lol, I think that would scare them away. There's other ways to find out their qualities, like asking in a not as confrontational way what they like about themselves and their current and future goals.

[dustybiker2]

No. You sound like a cop. lol I never liked that question. There are other ways to find those answers out.

[paledreams]

Yes I have - I'm a daydreamer - lol 😈😋👅😛 and I'd assume ( don't you just love that word, that dreaded word for some) 💟👀 that what I'd ask is - submissive lol 😉

[sirderpsalot123]

I never felt a need to give an interview. You should be able to figure out what she brings to the table after you’ve known her a reasonable amount of time. Asking it bluntly just seems unnecessarily conformational.

[Apple1996]

Nah but next time I'm on a date with my husband I will definitely ask him

[worldscolide]

I have, when she couldn't answer, I paid for the meal and ended the date

[Anonymous]

F*** no! To put it bluntly like that is rude AF. I wouldn't do that, nor tolerate that from a woman.

[Nicebutt462]

That's my opening line now. Grow some self esteem!

[Dongie]

Nah, but I have ended a date during din din and just walked out.

[Dongie]

I guess you could say I saw what she brought to the table.

[msc545]

No, only an asshole would say that. It's a date, not a business meeting. Unless of course the women is after money as they usually are.

[strateguy632]

i do not ask directly like that but i ask.

[shortster]

No, I let the waiter bring the food to the table.