What does it mean when basically every date you go on you get stood up or ghosted (on the day of the date: no confirmation)?

[Anonymous]

It’s becoming a reoccurring habit now.
I’m not ugly… but I do look very childlike in my face - my face isn’t fat or round I just look very very young and I’m very petite (4”10 and 100lb for context) my “dates” mainly just called cute and pretty. Never anything other than that.
Is this a “me” issue, do they just not desire me enough to care to show up?
I’m only asking because slowly it’s knocking my confidence.
Family and friends are always saying to me: “you are too pretty to had been single for this long”
I’m trying my best!! How can I get a boyfriend if I can’t even get them to show up to the agreed date and time?🥲🤷🏾‍♀️

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh girl, I totally feel you on that one. Getting ghosted or stood up constantly is such a downer on the self-esteem, no wonder it's starting to affect your confidence! A few thoughts:

- Your looks aren't the problem - these guys are just lame flakes who don't deserve you anyway. Your "childlike" looks don't mean you aren't desirable.

- Maybe try going for slightly older guys (mid-20s maybe versus early 20s) who could be looking for something more serious versus frat boy types just trying to hook up.

- Don't be afraid to put yourself out there on dating apps, but try to get phone numbers asap and move dates off the apps if possible. More personal connection helps weed out players.

- Consider doing a video chat before meeting up so you feel more comfortable each other's intentions are honest. Seeing your sparkling personality will show 'em what they're missing!

- Keep your chin up, sis! You'll find someone worthy who sees how amazing you are inside and out. Just focus on having fun for now until the right guy comes along who won't hesitate to treat you right.

Keep doing you - don't change a thing about that sweet self. The one is out there, I promise! In the meantime, we'll just have to crush these dates and show 'em what they're missing. You got this!

[genericname85]

i would say that the connection wasn't built up right to set the stage or a first irl meeting properly.

[Asker]

You are right. I forgot that texting constantly for 3 consecutive days isn’t enough nowadays.

[genericname85]

i mean the fact that you're texting alone says nothing. the quality of these texts and the topics do matter.

[DishLady]

Means you're gullible and don't know how to pick people. Toughen up and choose more wisely.

[Anonymous]

Change your behaviors if you want different reactions.

[Asker]

You are right. I am the problem. I’ll stop showing genuine interest in someone I’m interested in.
I’ll stop doing all of that.
I forgot men don’t like that.

[Opinion Owner]

That is why you are stuck. The world is not going to change for you. Humble yourself and lose the anger. It's not attractive either.