Boyfriend grieving and barely speaking to me?

[WinCx3d]

My boyfriend has told me for the past month his sister was sick. And last Tuesday she actually died. My boyfriend is one word responding me and not replying back and he went to new York to be with his family. I don’t know if i should show him i care and keep checking on him or back off since he’s being distant

[dustybiker2]

I lost my mum and was unplugged from life for three months. Mind you it was not a good end. But grief will hit a person in any number of ways. His time and space might be off kilter so don't hold him to days, weeks etc. He's probably just riddled with memories and emotions. Only way through it is to feel it.
What is most comforting is people tapping in once without needing reply (such comfort) and telling you they are there to listen if you need to talk.
Then leave him space. He hasn't forgotten you he's just trying to find his own way out of a helluva situation to be thrust into.
Losing pets rips you apart as it's just pure love. Losing a close family member shreds you as its mixed emotions with people. Guilt, anger, happiness on and on in rotation.

[DishLady]

You’re really a very selfish person to be making this time in his life all about you. Can’t you just leave him tf alone and let him grieve? I really hate when someone is so insecure that they have to constantly be validated and reassured by others to the point that they can’t understand the other person has a life full of struggles they need to deal with. My goodness.


Grow a heart and a conscience, girl.

[Anonymous]

I’d say check on him every other day. Let him know you’re there, if you love him say so. That if he needs to talk, he can call or text whenever. Men process things different. Chances are he’s thinking of a lot. Maybe some problems may have come up since his sister’s passing that you don’t know about. A majority of men don’t have someone to turn to in times like this. Even growing up as a boy you’re taught to be strong, to hold it together for the sake of the women, etc.

[OfMiceandMen]

I think I would check in on him once a day just to show some concern. Don't take it the wrong way if he doesn't get back to you, he's like busy helping with things.

Just a simple: Hey there hope you're doing okay, just checking in to see how you are doing.

If you know when the funeral is, perhaps send some flowers with a card, even just a small gesture like that will be something he remembers.

[HollyK21]

I agree with the others, just send him a text either once a day or once every other day. I’m sure this coldness won’t last much longer, but understandable right now as it’s only been about a week. Sending condolences by the way, that is a tough loss.

[RavVid]

It is difficult. Obviously he is going to have a lot of thoughts and no one can make it better including you.

I think say that you care but that you understand in the circumstances if he doesn't respond. What you must not do is be demanding right now but I still think you need to show you care. Short messages that don't need reples.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I would say to him, if he needs to talk, text or call you, let him know that you are there for him. I know this girl loss her brother due to him being sick with cancer and I saw her in Walmart, and she didn't speak to me, so you see sometimes people want to grieve alone.

[Anonymous]

i wouldn't expect much communication either if my partners sister died. i'd just let them grieve and deal with it. he will be back eventually. you can text him things to show him you care and are thinking of him in this time, but don't expect a response back. he sees them and likely appreciates it.

[luvstoned4him]

He just lost his sister. His mind is in scrambles and he is gonna be busy trying to help with the funeral.

I would send him thoughtful quotes and remind him that I love him and I am here for him.

[LiamJHayden]

Death of a loved one hits different people differently, and sometimes hits the same person differently depending upon the circumstances. Just let him know you are there for him and be as patient as you can be.

[chrissykerdock]

sounds like he could use a steady diet of blowjobs to feel better

[spartan55]

Give him some space, he will talk to you when he is ready.

[bowenw]

He is probably very busy, but I still think you should check in on him occasionally.

[WinCx3d]

Even if he’s not replying

[bowenw]

If I was in your shoes, I probably wouldn't send another message until receiving a reply from the first one, but you know him best.

[WinCx3d]

He replies sometimes and sometimes not a reply

[bowenw]

I suggest just keep doing what you are doing. If you were annoying him, I assume he would tell you to stop.

[Anonymous]

Give him a heartfelt condolences. And tell him you're here for him if he needs to talk. Then leave it alone till when and IF he does.

People deal with grief in all sorts of ways there's no telling how he does.

[beefcakebradybatson]

We lads are often reticent about sharing our feelings such as grief. Give your boyfriend a bit more time, then after a while ask him if he's comfortable with haring his loss with you.

[Anonymous]

It is early in the grieving process, I wouldn't read too much into.

[Chevy1_kb]

Sorry to hear that he died dolll ❤️

[Radiate143]

Don't message him.

[Fireguy17]

give him time, it just takes time.

[NOTHINGEVERHAPPENS]

Just check in on him once every other day or so.

[DrPepper12]

Keep checking in with no expect of reply.

[noohair]

Respectful contact would be good.

[Cheerfull009]

Console him in these grief moments