Met a guy I’m crazy about but unsure what I can do now, would love guidance?

[Anonymous]

I met a guy in June, and though we met on a hookup app, we connected deeply. He led conversations about his future, where he’d raise kids, and we talked about our hopes. We ended up having sex, and right after, he texted me wanting to see me again. He made plans but later got sick. He then opened up about his struggles with mental health, but for about four weeks, he kept me updated and said he wanted to meet.

Before I left on a month-long trip, he promised we'd see each other but couldn't meet. I sent 4 texts:

1. Thanking him for being understanding.
2. Checking in before my trip.
3. Saying I'd love to see him when I return (explicit).
4. Another explicit message.

When I got back, I let him know, but I haven’t heard from him for a month. I sent 4 more texts over the week, something I’ve never done before, basically saying that when he’s ready, I’m here.

He told me he’s going through a tough time, and I’m debating whether to delete him, but I still feel a strong connection.

My final text was:
"Hi, I hope you’re okay. When you're ready to meet again, I’m ready too. I know you need time, and I respect that. You’ve communicated from the start that you'd let me know, and when you're ready, I’ll be here."

Men of GAG I really need guidance, out of my depth. I never felt this way, and I really want to salvage this if I can. What can I do?

[Yesdarlingmoon]

what? you seriously think you can have a stable relationship from a man who is on a hookup app? by the way his mental health stuff is sorta an excuse im not saying he doesn't had experienced bad mental health but don't fall for the oldest trick in the book, you're a side option for him, if he wanted to take you off the market he would!. bro is probably hooking up with other women. im just saying choose a man who isn't on a freaking hook up app if you want something stable and possibly not get cheated on, men and women work in very different ways.

[Asker]

What would you recommend then? Just deleting. He told me from the get go about how his mental health was deteriorating after something happened. I know that’s often an excuse.

[Yesdarlingmoon]

then let him figure his stuff out but dont ever wait for someone, if you think he is not reliable for you then listen to yourself and delete it.

[Asker]

Thanks, that’s actually really decent. I decided if anything I think one more message and if not I’m deleting, gotta move on after that. I spaced the texts out a lot because I don’t want to chase. In about a week I’ll send one more I think if not then I’ll be done and delete it.

[Anonymous]

Mental illness = completely unpredictable. Ordinary rules don't apply.

[Asker]

So basically just buckle up, and don’t take action?

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆 I've seen this movie before. While predictable it's still funny everytime I read it.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should pour yourself some coffee (or tea or wine)

[thearchjoker]

So he's not responding to texts?

[Asker]

Currently not. It’s been 10 days since my final one. Currently considering deleting him, and just leaving his number open, I was tempted to say something today to check in. I don’t know what to do. He told me this might happen. I don't know what would you say? I’m worried if I delete him off the platform it will cost me any connection even if he does want to reach out.

[thearchjoker]

guess he's either still on a trip or lost intrest

[Asker]

I was on the trip for the month

[thearchjoker]

could it have been extended?

[Asker]

No my trip wasn’t extended I got back 2 weeks ago: so technically over the 2 weeks I had texted him. I’ve been back for 2 weeks since I left. I’m thinking of sending a final text. Just saying this, it’s been 2 weeks since that last text and this is a final.
Hii (name). It’s been a while—just wanted to see how you’re doing now. :) I’ve been reflecting and I’m open to reconnecting at whatever capacity you’re at. I’ve struggled with mental health before, and I know it’s not linear. I’m so sorry you are experiencing any of it. So when you do have capacity to reconnect again you let me know.-(my initial)

[thearchjoker]

he probably lost interest

[Anonymous]

What do u feel for him exactly

[Asker]

I genuinely think this could be a significant person, I felt sooo safe and open with him. Like anything was possible. And then met with 2 months of consistent contact and a month of him potentially going through it.

[Opinion Owner]

So he’s a friend, a comfort place. Romantic relationship need strong admiration of character and looks. U must feel like he’s a handsome guy , and will not settle for u , admiration like that