True or false: dating apps only work for the top percentage of attractive men?

Question

Those men get so much choice that they never settle and just move on from one partner to the next. The women label these as “situationships” which go nowhere. And for all other men, no amount of game will get them anywhere on apps. Some women go on 1 or 2 dates with guys not in the top percentage but don’t feel any excitement and will reject them saying there’s no chemistry. And the cycle continues.

mattthefatbat · Accepted Answer

Despite the advantage being attractive looking provides for men in online dating I'd have to say false, I think its all within who you meet, like for instance I'm not a attractive man, if I was I probably would've been able to meet someone in my own town and wouldn't have had to meet someone online. But i got lucky and I did meet my partner online, it started with us talking and as we got to talking more feelings growed more. That's why I feel like no matter how many times it takes its really just feels like luck sometimes. I do admit the luck would be greater for attractive looking men, but everyone sees attractive things differently.

But I do have to be honest about it, it's really rare to find women that think of growing a relationship further than friends if they aren't wanting it or aren't already liking you in that way. Based on how most dating apps are most women get lots of guys wanting to talk with them, so much so that you'd have to really be standing out to her in a way that really sets you apart from the guys she sees all the time on there. The way I usually like to see it though I believe like interests attract like interests a woman who loves godzilla movies is gonna find a guy that also likes godzilla movies much more appealing than some guy that has no interest in such movies yknow. But based on the 12 second interaction some apps are like some usually gonna go for the ones that they do find interesting within those first 12 seconds, mostly within the appearance of the guy and certain aspects of the bio that light up yes in her mind. While the ones they don't quite find that interesting but still would talk with, they may keep them around but talk to them every other blue moon. I used to believe there was some special technique attractive people do or whatever to get women to be more drawn to them, I simply just stop believing any of that now. Because you either connect or you don't and if you don't connect and keep trying to make something come then she'll see that as you trying way too hard. From what I heard though most women like certain uniquely male characteristics that make men. Men. Women looking for men usually aren't attracted to men that look like they are boys. If you get what I mean.
On social videos it shows the typical "if he ain't over 6ft..." as a common interest most women want in the men they go for. I can't really blame them, yknow everyone lives only one life why not go for whatever they want to go for, if you find a woman who puts height as that much importance in the men she chooses then it's really up to you to choose who you want to go for. There are still women out there that do look for more important things in the men they want to be with besides their appearance.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Of course there is a huge disparity of women voting no on this one. The vast majority have no idea of what dating is really like for most guys out there. They keep naively believing that is the same for guys as it is for them.

Anyway I have been on and off dating apps for 10+ years. When I first got on them I was getting matches and dates left and right. I was younger and in my physical good looks prime. Some dated were horrible but others were really good. I got into two long term relationships that started as a match on a dating app. I was physically considered an “8” by most women at that time. H

But then I got in my late 30s and got older. I didn’t lose my all my hair and/or grow a beer gut or anything. But I wasn’t baby faced anymore. I became a “7”. I quickly saw a huge drop off with matches and the ones I did get were lower quality.

Now what I said all above sounds superficial. In fact dating apps have really screwed up a ton of things for both men and women in western society. You can say I need to stay off them and meet women organically. But when I work two jobs and got committed hobbies (which are male dominated) that’s easier said then done. I also don’t live in a area where there are lots of single available women around.

But back to my original point. Looks and first impressions do mean a lot to women. In fairness guys have always been like that. But still when all else is even (looks, money, etc) the woman will always have an advantage over the man. They are always trying to “date up”.

I just wish more women could just acknowledge the truth on this. Just acknowledge they have this societal advantage in dating when all else is equal.

avery58 · Accepted Answer

Personally I match with and talk to guys that I find moderately attractive too, not just the top percentage... But if I'm going based off of pictures I do have to find him somewhat attractive at least, there are a few rare exceptions where I really like their bio or something else.

But that's just me, and cause I'm mostly using these apps to talk to new people without necessarily looking for a relationship or anything else (I put that in my bio as well), I just want to chat a little and maybe hang out but in a normal way.

I did meet one guy there who I found attractive but like a normal type attractive that you see anywhere, and he said he did meet some girls off of the app.

BiancaSN · Accepted Answer

It depends. Some women only care about men's looks, but most don't. I care about men's looks, but not as much as some men believe I do. I focus on many other characteristics (personality, conversation skills, maturity, and much more). Many average-looking men get women online, I've personally seen it happen. So, if online dating doesn't work, you're probably doing something wrong.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Keep telling yourself that story, try your hardest to believe it's true, and stay away from dating apps. Increases the odds for every guy who doesn't believe that nonsense.

AviatorTom · Answer

It worked for me, and I guarantee I'm not in the top 10%.

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

Guys need to stop thinking like this. Woman want what they want on an individual basis.

Yes the criteria is thin but it could also be anything.

A girl might be looking for a dad bod who has a job at Chipotle because if he goes corperate that's going to be a really nice discount.

Another might be looking for her emo counterpart who left that life behind but not really but who else would understand her.

What I'm trying to say is your chances are all about if she feels like you have compatibility.

If you're out looking for a chocolate shake and all you see are snow cones, coffee and rice balls... You see where I'm going with this?

Just put yourself out there and switch up the profile every so often.

ManInChains · Answer

True. Wormn only engage with physically attractive men. All they have to do is choose they don't even really have to swipe on men. Meanwhile men have to sit around swiping left and right hoping to get even 1 match and even then hope a conversation comes out of it otherwise they're back to swiping. It's a grueling and most of the time pointless waste of time process for men and I'm sure an overwhelming one for women. But at the end of the day the women are getting what they want and majority of men are left waiting years.

molonski2 · Answer

Thats not true in my view , since 1998 , the vast majority of women I've been with I met online , going right back to the first sites , like match. com ( where Michael Bury met his first wife by the way ) , I've always done well via apps and sites , agreed there are far more fakes now though ( and some are just for research ) .. thats just wrong on any level , for sure.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Nah, while it is much harder for men on dating apps, it's not impossible.. Just having some nice pics, and a good bio could take you a long way.. And, certain apps are better than others.. Like Hinge is probably the best for the average guy to get matches.. That being said... Dating apps do suck..

Ladsin2 · Answer

Not sure how to answer the poll. According to research 80% of women only right swipe 20% of men. This indicates that there's a large disparity which you've alluded to in the question. That said it certainly can work out as we're only looking for one partner. I met one of my exes off of tinder and we dated for a few years. I've also have had quite a few dates with women off the other sites none of which turned into long term relationships.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

False. If you go on dating apps as a man trying to get a gorgeous woman when you don't match her level of attractiveness nor are rich you are going to struggle.

Stay within your level of physical appearance and you will have success more often than not.

Anonymous · Answer

False. It's true that the top percentage of attractive men do better, but it's definitely not the case that everyone else fails. You just have to keep doing something regardless, dude. Use apps, have friends set you up, go to activities, approach girls in cafes. If you want to get your dick sucked--you're going to have to learn to talk to some girls!

Anonymous · Answer

It depends what you mean by "works". Dating apps work for the avg. guy (and the avg. woman) if the guy (and the woman) has realistic expectations. Online dating is not trip through the McDonald's drive through. Neither gender is typically very realistic in their search.

rienna888 · Answer

Yeah I guess that’s accurate but the reason for that is cuz guys are 99% the ones messaging girls on dating apps. So men are often the ones rejected. So it’s no surprise that attractive people have advantages for everything

DrPepper12 · Answer

Generally there is a bias but you said only. Women can get fucked by anyone anytime so they may as well have high standards.

Men will shot their shot and eventually work their way down to the tier they get the most responses from.

SweetJoyGirl · Answer

They don’t really work, tbh. It is a HUGE hit or miss.

LiamJHayden · Answer

They never worked for me. Well, they would have if I were into behemoths or women with five or more baby daddies.

77five · Answer

Why just men? Women too. Im a woman and I did horrible on the apps. I just gave up.

morganherrel · Answer

I strongly recommend that men stop using dating apps altogether and become part of the solution. I can elaborate on this endlessly.

Nikki1989 · Answer

100% false. Dating apps rarely work for ANYONE.

Sharkstealth · Answer

I've never once met any girl off of any dating ot hook up app. I just think they are fake. I stopped even going on them now.

debtfree_oneyear · Answer

I try a few different apps and while I got some matches I wouldn't say it was a success. As an average looking guy on Tinder I found it hard to find an average looking women.

Anonymous · Answer

Almost none of the men you're describing need dating apps. Therefore, no.

paledreams · Answer

To a degree True - same goes for True for the hottest women get the chocolates 💟😋

Anonymous · Answer

False, I’ve had pretty good luck using them and I’m not all that attractive, just have to take good pictures and have a decent bio.

Anonymous · Answer

absolutely true. the experiences of thousands of men on those apps is proof

Vegasrunner · Answer

Studies show that's true. Women only find a small percentage of men attractive.

Titus_of_Ultramar · Answer

All the studies point to that being the case

Tomisworthless · Answer

Do women not select the best option available?

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

Attractive, wealthy young white men, that is.

robocop666 · Answer

waste of time even for slightly good looking men

Anonymous · Answer

I’ll bang ugly men, just as long as they will leave their house to meet me

Nirmroth · Answer

False or I wouldn't be able to get dates lol

Anonymous · Answer

Why would attractive guys be on dating apps?

Unit1 · Answer

Of course. Try it and see for yourself 🤪

LazerBean · Answer

Obviously false.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

YEAH BASICALLY

Crazzyyworld · Answer

Internet is gold diggers paradise

BarryLiverstone · Answer

False

bmn1201 · Answer

Yes true

captain_voidwalker · Answer

100% true

True or false: dating apps only work for the top percentage of attractive men?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said