Should I let my girlfriend go without me on vacation with her friends?

[michalpl00]

So we were doing a quiz together and this came up and I think that for me if my boys invited me to go on a trip, I would want to bring my girlfriend with me. I told her that I wouldn’t be comfortable with her going out with her friends because they would party and honestly I don’t trust her friends. Honestly I think that partying is a thing that you do when you’re single because it’s a environment where people are drunk and hookups happen and I wouldn’t be comfortable with her being approached by other guys. I feel like she should do that out of respect for me goes for me. I wouldn’t go with my friends to party without her or vacation. I feel like I’m just thinking about my parents and how weird it would be for my mom to go with her girlfriends on a trip without my dad. It just makes me uncomfortable and also my girlfriends friends are single and I don’t want her to do single activities. Now it might sound like I am insecure, but I really fucking love her and she means the world to me. like some activities you do when you were single you don’t do when you’re in a relationship. I just need advice. We are in a long distance relationship. And to people that say that long-distance relationships doesn’t work because I saw that a lot of people saying it, fuck off I don’t wanna hear it. We are both committed.

[Oliverlogan263]

I get where you're coming from man, it's always nerve-wracking letting your girl go off without you. But here's a couple things to think about:

- Trust is so important in any relationship, especially long distance ones. You gotta believe that she cares about you and won't do anything to jeopardize what you guys have.

- Enjoying time with her friends is healthy too. We all need breaks to unwind with pals without our partners sometimes.

- As long as she's responsible and sets some boundaries, a girls trip can just be fun quality time between friends.

- If you come at it from a place of insecurity or control, it might push her away instead of make her feel loved.

My advice would be have an open, honest talk about wants/fears from both sides. Set some agreed upon rules together if it makes you more comfortable. Then try letting go a bit and trusting in your relationship. Easier said than done, I know. But showing faith in her will likely be rewarded with her faith in you too. You'll get through this long distance no problem if you've got good communication.

[michalpl00]

Thank you so much man. I needed to hear this.

[Oliverlogan263]

No problem dude, happy I could help give some perspective! Communication and trust are so important in any relationship. Just remember she's with you cause she likes you for you. Let her know you care and want her to be happy, even if that means doing her own thing sometimes. As long as you two respect each other, you'll be straight. Don't forget to tell her how much she means to you too while she's away having fun - girls love that mushy stuff lol. You guys got this bro, long distance is tough but your bond is clearly strong. Take it easy and good luck!

[exitseven]

The thing is if she is going to party and hook up with other guys she could be doing it now and you will never find out.

[michalpl00]

True, she could, ifs she's a cheater it might be happening now too. All I got to do is trust. But some boundaries takes away the worry and shows commitment to the relationship

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[Anonymous]

Tell her you don't want her to go so she knows how controlling you'll try to be the rest of her life and she can bail now. Don't tell us how committed you both are after a huge speech about how paranoid you are she'll be out with friends. You want to go to control her. She needs to know all your toxic traits like this.

[michalpl00]

It’s not controlling it’s just my boundaries. If she wants to go out there and do single activities, she can be single. I’m not a guy that accepting everything and the fact that she is willing to compromise is amazing. And I do respect her boundaries too if she says something, she doesn’t want me to do. I will listen to her. She told me she doesn’t want to hug other girls as greetings for example, that’s good. It’s not a big deal for me, but it is a big deal for her and therefore I’m not gonna do it. It’s respect

[nevooo]

Your trust issues are justified, this anon woman acts like the majority of people lie and don’t cheat lol. Even if your girlfriend isn’t a cheater, when you’re drunk and having fun no one knows what’s happening

[michalpl00]

Yes and she agreed to not go partying, i would feel very uncomfortable if she did that. But she told me then I am not going to parties together which I fine. It’s fine because I love her, i don’t need to party. But a girls trip. Yeah she will parties, it just a disgusting environment. I can't be there if anything happens.

[michalpl00]

I wouldn’t want my girl in places like that wtf. It’s part of the problem in this world. Getting drunk and party is just stupid if you have goals in your life and want a future with your girl. Like I partied a lot but now when i have my girlfriend my priorities change.

[Ariesman81]

Well done man. Don't let the shame, guilt and manipulation get to you. You are 100% correct.

[michalpl00]

Thank you bro,

[mandyfire98]

Man I gotta be honest, this relationship sounds super controlling and hyper dependent beyond belief. This is a toxic relationship I'm afraid.