We had sex and now he wants to be friends?

[Anonymous]

We slept together for a month. He said that he was not ready for a relationship. He acted like he didn’t want me to leave. I chose to stop seeing him. He got jealous when he thought I was dating someone else. 6 months later, he asked to see me. Went to dinner and he paid. He touched me romantically and then said he doesn’t want to lead me on. So I told him that he cannot keep touching me if he doesn’t want to lead me on. He said we can talk on the phone and hangout.
In the past, When we were fucking, he acted like he didn’t have time to hangout and talk on the phone.

Somebody please help me understand.

[HollyK21]

It would be blatantly oblivious of you to think that any kind of purely platonic friendship can exist after all you two have done. For starters, men usually aren’t interested in maintaining a friendship with no strings attached unless there’s other pieces in place. For example, maybe one or both of you are in a relationship, one/both don’t find the other attractive, or one/both aren’t straight. Outside of exceptions such as these, he does not want to be your friend, not when he’s still trying to touch on you and you’ve have the recent history you do.


If I were you and I knew I wanted more than casual sex with a guy then I wouldn’t talk to this one anymore. I doubt he’s who you go to for advice or do hobbies with. You most likely wouldn’t call him for spontaneous lunches or basically anything you would call a female friend for. So if he can’t keep it platonic (which I doubt he wants because then he fully loses access to hookups) then let him go. Don’t play into these games.

[Screenwriter]

It's call being wishy washy. He doesn't want a relationship, but he wants all the benefits of a relationship with none of the concommitant responsibilities. He wants a friends with benefits sort of thing.

Leave this dude alone. You can find someone else who's in line with what you want. He's not.

[incorrected]

What do you want out of him, and what does he want out of you? Have you communicated all of that to each other? Set out what you want, and if he isn't giving you that, get rid of him. It's pretty simple, and you don't really need to understand how his mind is working to know if he's giving you what you want or not.

[ohsheeT]

He doesn't even sound like a good friends with benefit... I got to think that he's probably selfish and only thinking about himself anyway

[MzAsh]

You two want conflicting things and he’s trying to damnest to get his without giving you want you want.

[Valdemort]

Clear case of disinterest. Been there, and it honestly comes down to the benefits until that option gets taken. Not worth your time. Not for now anyway.

[Flower7]

He is not interested in you. He just wanted access to sex.

[jahaims]

That's what happens when you choose to deal with an immature man. He wants the benefits of a relationship without the commitment.

[Pterodon]

You fucked him for a month then find out he doesn’t want a relationship. Well shame on you for spreading your legs

[AnonAndrew]

@Pterodon What the heck is wrong with that? Why are you guilt-tripping her for having sex?

[Pterodon]

@AnonAndrew I’m not. I’m guilt tripping her for thinking he wanted a relationship AFTER she fucked him

[AnonAndrew]

@Pterodon "shame on you for spreading your legs" sounds like guilt-tripping to me.

[beefcakebradybatson]

He's a boy, and we lads can be impetuous about a partner.

[Shortkay4568]

He just wants to fuck you

[Anonymous]

This is hilarious.😆😆😆