A 54 year old guy said a 56 year old woman was too old. What are your reactions to that?

Question

Would you be disgusted and want to drop that superficial friend? Should I be lucky he's not in my life more?

TheRealPepperPotts · Accepted Answer

I'd just ask "Why's that?". I'd suspect most guys response would be along the lines of "She's unattractive" "Fat" "No energy" "Doesn't do anything" etc. I'm not saying their reasoning is always justified. But if we look at most older women, they really don't put effort into their lives or appearance. The ones that do are out of the league of most guys their age and would have been when they were both younger, too. And are probably married. :)

I'd honestly say the same about many guys my age. They've "let themselves go" and are not physically attractive because they never cared about what they ate or how much activity they maintained. When they were younger they could get away with it and still look good. But past age thirty, most people have to work for their fitness and health or lose it. Most people start to lose it and few ever get it back.

The other thing is that the longer we know someone, the more we are able to look beyond things like aging and see the person we fell in love with.

So no, I wouldn't dump a friend over that (unless he started hinting about him and me). I'd try to understand first, and maybe grab a few pictures of older celebrity women who have maintained their looks and see if his view adjusted.

DishLady · Accepted Answer

Well... Too old for WHAT, precisely? Bungie jumping? Yeah, I'd agree. For wearing that ridiculous flash dance t-shirt? Meh, it would depend on her bod.

56 isn't 25... so there IS some stuff you're obviously not going to do anymore... You've leveled up and in some cases aged out. Didn't get to some junk on your bucket list? Too bad, so sad. Make a new list. Don't dwell in the negative. Period.

Mr 54 is of course right behind you, but a guy at that age deludes himself into thinking he has tons of options and all the time in the world because guys tend to be a bit more financially stable in their 50s, they know how a few things work, and so these average, now-wisened souls believe themselves to be "the sh*t"... It's called mid-life crisis. It usually comes with a new car, a few trendy blazers or a hairstyle to make him feel more vibey and youthful. (Most of my guy friends are going through this phase right now. It's a little funny to watch, but I don't actually say much to them about it. It's something they have to navigate and get out of their system.)

RandomUser1000 · Accepted Answer

People can have different preferences when it comes to dating.
It doesn't have to be a big deal unless we make it a big deal.
Like you can turn someone down without being rude or mean about it.

One thing with age is women have more of a "biological clock" then men.
Men in their 40's or 50's often have no problem getting a fertile woman pregnant.
While many women over 40 have low or no fertility.

If a man wants to have kids, he's better of dating a young woman, regardless if he himself is young or not.

I'm not saying that is he's thing. Maybe he already has kids and don't want more, or doesn't have kids and don't want to either.

Just that biologically it's often possible for men in their 50's to have kids.

Avicenna · Accepted Answer

That's not a valid reason to discontinue a friendship, IMHO. We all have friends that have what we think are strange views on things. While his opinion is pretty silly to most people, he has a right to hold it, and it's not an existential ethical or moral failure- people have all different sorts of dating preferences.

AviatorTom · Answer

He's entitled to his opinion, no matter how stupid it is.

Anonymous · Answer

Why would this bother you unless there was a part of you that questioned if their might be some validity to what he said?

The REALITY is youth is attractive, along with confidence, along with status, along with being fit, etc. I could keep going but you get the point.

A 54 year old woman is not OVER. But if she isn't that pleasant of a person than on top of that her lack of youth will be her death knell in dating.

I laugh at women who make blanket statements like this same as men. But I know that they are not born from the ether. They do have an at least PARTIAL basis in fact. But if the woman's good points outweigh her bad than the right guy is going to take notice. So why worry about 💩 like this?

molonski2 · Answer

She is too old , pure and simple , he needs younger for sure , zero doubt about it , at that age , women do not age well in the most part , plus she is probably menopausal , so its pretty obvious she is too old.

We certainly see that all the time , it doesn't work at all.

PeachyPie93 · Answer

Neutral.. Since he has his opinion.. I personally am not attracted to guys older than me either so oh well.. Most 54 year old guys look like shit themselves, hell a lot of guys my age look like shit especially white men since they don't take care of themselves. But people are allowed their own preferences.

4ngelic · Answer

if i somehow had a 54yo male friend who said that i wouldn't drop him for that but it would lower my opinion of him.

anyways whenever i see dudes say stuff like that i always think about how delulu these dudes are about their own attractiveness to women, especially to young women. like if you're a 50yo man i'm sorry but you're not attractive anymore, just like women of the same age

SixFootSexy · Answer

Most women don't realize that unless a man is related or committed to you, your worth is in your youth and beauty. The Wall is undefeated. Commit while you're young or get used to a cats-and-wine life. Molly Ringwald

Pudsmucker · Answer

Problem is most of us guys have a tendency to think it's okay to date somebody younger. But what about them dating somebody a little bit older. I have a friend he is 6 years younger than his wife. They get along great. They probably will die approximately the same time. They've been married quite a 40 plus years. Age doesn't matter. It's where your heart is.

WindAtMyBack · Answer

Well I'm 68 and I think most 56 year old women are too old. Most have let themselves go and it's just not appealing.

Crimsyjo · Answer

Neutral  His life his choice.  Most men do prefer a woman younger than themselves.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

You can be friends with who you like. But ending a friendship over that would be a bit extreme in my opinion. Men tend to date younger. When single i've been told by women a few years older that I was too young for them.

RichA322 · Answer

His life, his choice.  Some guys prefer younger women, some guys prefer older women, some guys prefer women of the same age. Not my business what other people do.

Shiprex · Answer

Too old for what? For a relationship? For him maybe but is she expecting because they're at the same stage in life to be therefore appealing to him?

PBandJ_Nerd · Answer

I find that to be weird honestly. She's only 2 years older than him, it's not that much of a difference in age.

Kelley1 · Answer

He is absolutely right. She is too old for him; maybe if she was forty or even forty-five, but fifty-six--no way.

northerngal · Answer

Everyone is allowed to have their preferences. I am sure many women think that 54 year old men are over the hill as well.

exitseven · Answer

Everybody is different. Some people age faster than others depending on environment and genetics. I know several women that look great into their 50s. Some look tough when they are still in their 30s.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I’d say that was pretty shortsighted and laugh it off.. I guess what he is saying really is that he prefers younger women and I’m fine with that.

Apple1996 · Answer

I'd think he's a hypocrite lol I couldn't be friends with someone like that

Smashingdoozy · Answer

I'd ask if they've checked their birth certificate recently

FunkyMonkee · Answer

If he means, too old for having babies, yeah. Her baby factory should've closed up by now, unless he's still taking the pill.

Daniela1982 · Answer

Honestly, women age worse than men after they turn 55. So that statement could be true.

JonCobretti · Answer

Why are you hyping it up so much? It's his personal preference.(If the topic was about dating or getting in a relationship with)

chrissykerdock · Answer

i would date a 54 year old so i may be the problem

incorrected · Answer

I would wonder what he meant by that. Too old for what?

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

Women age like milk... men age like fine wine. Deal with it.

slatyb · Answer

That's pretty silly. There are 56-year-olds who look 40.

HungTexan · Answer

I think it’s probably complicated. But she’s not that old - he should look at himself.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I have heard older men say things like that. Total hypocrites.

Anonymous · Answer

Is this a hypothetical question, or does it refer to an actual guy who said that? If the latter, was he saying a particular 56 year old woman was too old, or all women that age? Context is important.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

It's kind of sad that he feels that way, but it's not craziest thing I've heard.

Anonymous · Answer

I assume this relates to dating rather than friendship.  If he has money and/or can attract younger women, then he had the option to not date 56 year olds. Hardly news.

oldpigg · Answer

A 56-year-old woman is an old lady. I'd rather be single than have to kiss an old lady.

Vegasrunner · Answer

That's way to old for a woman. I would say anything around 40+ is too old for women to be taken seriously in the dating market.

GlowUpGirly5 · Answer

That's his preference. No one complains when women say they want a man who is 6ft 5 and rich. Why can't men have preferences?

Pete671 · Answer

I'm 61 and it's not about numbers imho, and judging a person on age is just weird,,, My girl is 74 and still amazingly hot,,,

nawtee_me · Answer

Everyone has their preferences. My ex-wife is 13 years younger than me. Even though we are not still together we are still friends.

shortster · Answer

Makes sense. 56 is too old to have kids. Though most guys that are 54 already have kids; so the question is he in the majority or the minority?

JRDone · Answer

I think it doesn't make sense but maybe he isn't into older women  Be happy he isn't in your life anymore

LiamJHayden · Answer

Different people have different preferences.

llorando · Answer

Neutral, even though it's stupid, it's his right to pick and choose his friends.

IWILLPLEASEYOU · Answer

Age is a little thing that we're going to be if your enjoying berating them I just want you to enjoy it when you're everything that age includes.

Anonymous · Answer

I totally understand that. Hell, I'd get that if a 35 year old guy said a woman the same age as him or a bit older is too old.

kaucky1 · Answer

If there's any 59 yr milf or older there's ways to make them young easily poppy flower

Jerre · Answer

I’m 53 and dated with women from ages 18-65 and enjoyed being with all of them

Anonymous · Answer

It’s stupid for him to say since their about the same age

Anonymous · Answer

It all depends on a person's viewpoint. I will not date a woman over the age of thirty. My current age is 43 years old.

MsElizabeth2000 · Answer

He’s old to me old is state of mind. I know people in their 20s who are old.

Anonymous · Answer

He probably knows that he is too old as well.

Agape93 · Answer

Like ok, you're too old too bruh but here we are

teamvic · Answer

I think he's forgotten how old he is haha

lightbulb27 · Answer

people age differently, so each to own.

strateguy632 · Answer

I agreed with age 54.

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

In that case, he's too old as well.

Valdemort · Answer

Too old for what though?

AmeerX · Answer

A woman is always old after her menopause.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

He's a fuckin idiot be glad he's not in your life

Anonymous · Answer

Sounds like a missed bullet for woman

HaveNoName · Answer

It all depends on the context behind that comment.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Did he know what her age was?

Anonymous · Answer

I’d be angry just like you are

A 54 year old guy said a 56 year old woman was too old. What are your reactions to that?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

A 54 year old guy said a 56 year old woman was too old. What are your reactions to that?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.