Am I overthinking or looking for reasons to justify why I’m always single?

[Anonymous]

30F and I wonder if most women get where I’m coming from. I’ve never been in a real relationship, saw someone very briefly in my early twenties. Haven’t had sex either since then and don’t feel the need to, masturbating doesn’t do anything for me. Also doesn’t help that I’m not the friendliest, the only way I’ve met up with guys over the years were on dating apps. I get attention on them but it just feels off in a way, I’ve always felt like I am going to end up alone. I don’t want kids but like the idea of getting married, over the years people have justified my single status to being picky or shy etc. Those are excuses or cop outs, I feel like compared to the average woman though I likely get less attention from guys in person.

Literally the only attention I’ve gotten from guys I find attractive are on dating apps, in person maybe someone I was outside with would tell me that this guy looked at me etc (on and off throughout the years). But they never make it known to me directly, it makes me second guess things. It’s like I always wonder why I never have a boyfriend if I’m told I’m attractive, I also hear about a lot of introverted/socially awkward women that are in long term relationships. I really wonder if finding the right person is the answer to all my issues, I’ve spoken to guys in the past and tend to find ways to get out of it before I determine if they’re a good fit or not. Something about guys has always felt…different. Since I was in my teens, never got the craze with being boy crazy etc.

You’re just overthinking

No, there’s more to it

[Dargil]

Get a lined sheet of paper. Draw a vertical line down the centers.

Head the left column What guys want. Be honest with yourself. Cover everything you can think of. Give honest, uneven scores to each item. Gives competent Blowjobs out scores Good Driver, for example. Put scores of the items you offer in the right column. Add them up. Do the same for What guys dislike on another sheet. Add up the scores. Devise a plan to improve the scores in both sheets. Since you will need to test them, don't hesitate to ask guys out to test your conclusions. It can be as simple as "maybe we can have coffee and talk sometime.". That's one high score item that all guys want.

[Anonymous]

You want to be single. Or more accurately you expect the man to do all the work. You don't know how to inspire men to make more of and effort because once again you're lazy. Yet that doesn't stop your expectations of him from being sky high. And when that doesn't materialize you come up with reasons to say he isn't the one.

You should just probably be single.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Being always single doesn't need justification, you take the time you need before jumping back in the dating world

[Anonymous]

You're a woman you will find a guy easy. There will be plenty of good guys that will want you. Do not worry.