Would you prefer the hard honest truth or a big white lie?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Truth works better, in my last relationship I hurt her both by being honest while knowing it would hurt as well as accidentally because sometimes a true opinion hurts without me expecting it to hurt. But it was also the foundation of why our relationship worked well and she told me as much. She would rather feel a bit of pain knowing I'd never lie to her and she could build upon me and receive so much honest love by comparison that it was way better for her than to have to doubt if my love for her was real.

Its because it goes both ways. Sometimes very painful assumptions or insecurities can come up that are far more painful than what I told the truth about. So when I then again am honest as to why I love her so much she never has to doubt if I am being sincere. Any kind of pain or insecurity I can take away that way and give her immense love in return, the only price is that I am honest when it would hurt a bit to receive that honesty.

A lot of girls these days had toxic partners in the past, and they could only build with you if they know your not just pretending. They need to hold on to the purity of your words both healing and painful because it gives that assurance its real. The only way you can overpower someone's doubts from the past is by always being honest.

A lie on the other hand sooner or later you are inconsistent or slip up, they will pick up on it and know. Or they bait by asking something with a painful answer on purpose to see if you are honest or deceitful. If in those moments you lie or the lie gets found out later the relationship is doomed since it then sparks questions what else got lied about.

Plus of course the more simple factor that you want honest feedback from a partner. I remember a date where we were preparing for dinner together. I had gifted a hair accessory and she put it in her hair asking if it looked good. It didn't, it looked silly at the spot she had put it. I gave her honest advice on why it didn't and she adjusted it accordingly, based on that advice it looked perfect and she went out in public looking beautiful. Had I not said anything for the sake of not being offensive she could not have relied on me to have her back for that kind of preparation, ultimately she wanted to present herself well after all.

I know that was a long answer on how I operate, but how about receiving it myself? Exact same way, it prevents so much doubt.

D_Bone_Steak · Accepted Answer

Nothing is worse than being forced to dig for the real truth. Expcially out of some bitch who treats the truth like something that should not be. Can you feel the struggle just from me saying that shit? Because the struggle is real and I should've never even known what that shit feels like.

Would you prefer the hard honest truth or a big white lie?

So when I point myself out for being a loser for when I was having loser moments with bullshit like this you better respect it or I'll come to your house and put a zip tie around your neck and kick you on video until you go to get raped by my dead unkcle. That was a bit harsh... I love you.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

A bit too general. It is absolutely concerning what the truth or lie was about!

If you're lying about paying me back the $100 you borrowed from me, that would be annoying and would tax our friendship if I needed to get paid back in a timely manner... and I expected it...

And I would not lend you the $100 if you told me the hard, honest truth. "I WANT to pay you back, hon, but my work hours have been cut and my credit cards are maxxed out and I really DO NOT KNOW when I can pay you back." That hard, honest truth would NOT get you the 100.

But as to something more personal? If it was too personal, I might tell a big, murky lie if I didn't want to reveal the "hard and honest."

The point being that the hard, honest truth isn't always the best idea if it hurts someone unnecessarily.

Account · Accepted Answer

Everyone claims that they prefer the truth and they probably think they do, but alas, nobody can handle the truth.

Summeroflove · Answer

Either tell the truth or don’t say anything at all. There is a compassionate way sometimes to tell the truth but I would rather someone be honest with me and I want someone I can be honest with as well.

HawkPerception · Answer

Always the cold hard truth. Even if it hurts a ton.

Zack-Bann · Answer

The truth

White lies by definition imply you don’t trust that a person can handle the truth

I find that insulting

The only time a white lies is ok is when the truth is none of the other person’s business (as in lying to a stranger about something pointless)

godfatherfan · Answer

That depends on what the issue is.

If she is breaking up with me because the new guys she is seeing has a horse cock, and she wants to get gorilla fucked by this monster cock, then tell me the lie.

If there are real and true issues, then tell me the truth.

Communicationisking · Answer

Truth for sure is the way to go. Then things can be dealt with and sorted out. Finding out you have been lied to makes it really hard to trust the person ever again.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Hard honest truth even if it hurts. I can't get better or be the best me if people sugar cost things. My ask is to be direct but actionable if you want to say something that would require change.

Shiprex · Answer

Truth is healthy and clean. A big white lie can be found out and cause worse trust and other interpersonal issues

RedInnocent69 · Answer

I think there’s a middle ground. For example, “it was a one night stand and didn’t mean anything” may be just as true as, “it was a one night stand, but he fucked four times and was so much bigger than you it hurt”…

PrincessC16 · Answer

Give it to me straight. Don't beat around the bush.

Sonorous · Answer

I prefer the truth. I've always valued truth over illusion. Even when it hurts to hear.

Miristheiss · Answer

Usually the truth.  Others deciding how much of the truth you get to know is usually always a bad thing.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

truth is easier to deal with and I'm lazy AF :D

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Just tell me the truth so that I can be in denial for a while and then finally grapple with and accept it..

lorenzomichael · Answer

I’m a truth telling guy so I would like to be told the truth. I wouldn’t care what it’s about even if it hurts me. Better to know the truth than to be told some bullshit thinking that it’s the truth.

Anonymous · Answer

Probably the hard honest truth, but I would understand if someone told me a white lie to spare my feelings as long as it wasn’t done out of malice

Pet68 · Answer

The truth. Always. I don't understand how anyone can actually enjoy being lied to, I really can't.

es20490446e · Answer

There aren't any hard truths, just either people articulating them wrong or not wanting to correct them.

DrPepper12 · Answer

If you chose truth some of you are liars. Something's we're better off being blissful about...

KostasKouvalis · Answer

This is so relevant to my current situation. Hard honest truth. Truth is always better, even if it's not what you want to hear

Anonymous · Answer

The truth! It always stings at first but at least you’re able to start to grow and move on after you hear things this way.

NoOneEver · Answer

Truth is faster and easier to deal with. I always prefer the truth.

Nik1hil · Answer

Honest Truth, It's harsh but that where the Improvement begins

Iron_Man · Answer

The truth and nothing but the truth I wanna know what I’m up against. I don’t wanna be fed white lies or any excuses

RedThread · Answer

Truth. I'll always choose an ugly truth over a beautiful lie.

Massageman · Answer

"Truth", at least in the eyes of the speaker of said words- - - - -

Shiningtempest · Answer

I'd go with hard honest truth because I perceive a person who tells a white lie as a spineless person.

Anonymous · Answer

Honest truth, always honest truth! You cannot fix a problem unless you know there is a problem.

abc3643 · Answer

A big hard penis between my legs again... that's what I'd prefer.

Ironco · Answer

I always tell the truth, I'm too lazy to remember lies...

Sabretooth · Answer

hard honest truth... not much you can do to me, these days.

Elena85 · Answer

The truth especially close friends. only people I lie to are telemarketers.

Spencer10 · Answer

Give me the truth right between the eyes...

Fantastic-User · Answer

Usually the truth

DishLady · Answer

HHT of course.

Lynx122 · Answer

Truth even if it's difficult :)

HungTexan · Answer

The truth always

Professor-college · Answer

Exactly what are we talking about? I think it depends on the situation

Alex-Snow · Answer

While the truth may suck I would prefer to hear it

NicholasRedone · Answer

Hard honest truth - 😅 -

glennos89 · Answer

Give me the raw unfiltered truth please

goaded · Answer

Little white lies are OK, big ones, no.

NathanDavis · Answer

Truth.

Emmat178 · Answer

Honest truth 100%. I hate white lies.

MikeRJ · Answer

The truth is better in the long run.

Eempriyanka · Answer

Truth.. there is only one

PeachyPie93 · Answer

The truth..

Purpleronnie · Answer

Truth …. always

Agape93 · Answer

Truth

Unap0logetic_ · Answer

The truth always.

Fireguy17 · Answer

The truth any day.

butterly248 · Answer

Truth

Uglygaypoorcoward94 · Answer

the truth always

Jerre · Answer

Truth always

SpaceGalaxy · Answer

hard truth

Would you prefer the hard honest truth or a big white lie?

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Would you prefer the hard honest truth or a big white lie?

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