Why is a man dating a woman with a child frowned upon amongst men?

[Anonymous]

[SteveSmith1985]

It's not. Not by men generally.

It's a CERTAIN TYPE of guy (with a certain set of beliefs about men and also about women) who has any problem with this.

The thing is, men of this type feel really really strongly about it. They are loud and vocal and passionate about it. They are intense about it.

So, they tend to be disproportionately the men you hear from about this.

Most men don't see it this way, but also don't feel intensely about it. It's not something they feel the need to be as vocal about. They are less inclined to bother vocalizing an opinion at all. (to you I mean, or say, on this question).

I can tell you. Most guys don't feel this way. If one of your buddies gets a new girlfriend... and that girlfriend has a kid... Nobody's talking shit behind his back because his new girl has a kid? That's just not how most guys act.

I'm sure there are some circles where that's not the case. I'm sure men who have strong feelings about a man dating a woman with a child are sometimes friends with each other, and call their buddy "a cuck" for it. But this is not most groups of guys.

Don't confuse the views of a loud and vocal minority with the views of men generally. This isn't how most of them feel.

🙂

[Summeroflove]

At the end of the day people will judge you no matter what you do. I think some single moms should be avoided but the bad apples spoil the bunch.

Many are good people who either came from crappy situations or sure made some imperfect decisions. But are focusing on what’s best for their children as well as have matured.

[ohsheeT]

It's not it Actually a good thing if you're responsible enough.
And if you understand and that you understand it's a package deal and you're not selfish. It will work out pretty good

[Anonymous]

I think most men avoid dating single mothers for three reasons. First, a mother will always prioritize her child above her partner, and a child takes a lot of a mother's time. So dating options are very limited in those relationships.

Second, when a woman becomes a single mother it's a red flag because more often than not it's a result of irresponsibility and poor life choices, so it's a poor reflection on her character.

Finally, for men, having a child means legal responsibilities without legal rights. Why would a man choose to put himself in that situation for another man's child?

[Blunky]

First time hearing about it being frowned upon. Who my buddies choose to date is their business, not mine.

Everyone has their own preferences, though some people like to use their own preferences as a cudgel and they do this in most, if not all, aspects of their life. "My way or the high way" kind of crap.

[Anonymous]

Most men don’t frown down upon what another man does relationship wise. But most men who are looking for a relationship don’t want a relationship like that for a lot of reasons. There are some me. Who are ok w that, then there are men who aren’t ok w dating a single mom. I don’t think it’s worth it, but that’s me. I’ve tried it before. Big headache.

[Anonymous]

Because real men don't raise another guy's kid. It goes against nature. Why would any guy be second place in a relationship, and use his time and resources to raise a child for another man who got that woman pregnant and ran? The other guy got the best of her when she was younger and wasn't tied down, then he abandoned her like garbage. No guy should be humiliated like that.

[BonzoInBitburg]

I didn't know if it's frowned upon but I don't see and reason to date someone with a kid when there are plenty of datable women without kids. The choice of obvious

[jahaims]

The guy is paying for her poor choices and choosing to be a simp. Society and culture should shun people who make selfish choices.

[zagor]

It isn't in general. It's mostly younger guys who avoid it.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Men that have nothing going on worry about such strangers dating.

[slatyb]

Which men? It seems perfectly normal to me.

[Anonymous]

Common sense.