I have feelings for older man at work, this is the situation, do you think I should go for it?

[Anonymous]

There’s an older man I work with who I have developed feelings for. I’ve known him for 7 years, I’m 35 he’s 55.

I’ve felt like this for years now and got to the point when it’s now or never and I’m driving myself insane wondering if he’s just being nice or if he feels the same.

My work doesn’t care about people dating.

He’s been single for a year after a brief relationship and I’ve been single for 5 years.

We’ve always had a friendship but since he became single again we’ve become closer.

I’ve always had feelings for him and I was delighted when he told me he was single again. I was really confused due to the age gap for a long time but now I don’t care. I just don’t know how he feels.

We do flirt, teasing, touching, compliments (mostly him) and he helps me out, we text a few times a week, he has listed out everything he likes about me, he said once he wished he was 10 years younger and he’d be with me, he talks to me about his family, problems, goals and most recently brought up doing something together.

He mentioned about a month ago going for a hike and told me to let him know when I’m free.

Since then he asked me to go on a trip (his friend has a boat which he borrows) and you can visit an island to see birds, seals etc and I said I’d love to go with him but the weather was really bad so cancelled.

The next time I couldn’t make it as I was out of town visiting family.

That was 2 weeks ago and since then I’ve mentioned going twice, and he keeps mentioning it too and said he would let me know the next time he’s available.

I haven’t mentioned going on a hike again, as I didn’t want to come on too strong and as the last 2 weeks I had mentioned the boat trip. I just really want to hang out with him just us and out of work.

What I should do? Should I wait for him or should I bring up going for a hike again?

I don’t want to be annoying or desperate but he’s never asked me to hang out before so I’m really excited and want it to happen so bad!!

[Anonymous]

I’d say stop playing the waiting game and just tell him how you feel. Truth is none of us have the answers to the questions that matter most, like if he’s mutually interested or just having fun flirting with a younger woman at work. We could instill all the positive reinforcement and motivation that you’re looking for but at the end of the day you’ve got to give your own self that push. Just be prepared for whatever the aftermath may be, which is hopefully something that works in your favor but you never know with men.

[MasterKS]

smart advice. kudos!

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks!☺️

[MasterKS]

people needs this positive attitude, can i follow you?

[Asker]

Thank you!

[Cormac995]

He's leaving the ball in your court probably because of the age difference and he's worried it might be inappropriate. I recommend in this case you ask him out. It will make him feel better about it because speaking as a guy a large age difference with a woman can make you self conscious because a lot of people think he's a pervert but I know someone I respect and love a lot and he's 20 years older than his wife and they've been married over 20 years and it's the healthiest marriage I've seen. You're both adults, you both like each other, you both consent fuck it ask him out and tell him how you really feel.

[Asker]

So I mentioned the trip again and I said something about the weather looking good for the next few weeks and he said he will “give me a shout and we can shoot off.”
He’s never mentioned it again. So I’m just waiting on him now I guess.

[Cormac995]

How long ago was this conversation about going on a trip? How long have you been waiting since?

[Asker]

I mentioned it a week ago. I don’t think I can do it again!

[Cormac995]

give it more time a week isn't that long if you're planning a trip. Try flirting in some other ways to keep yourself on his mind. Be subtle but not too subtle either.

[ohsheeT]

Well you can always say since your never going to take my on that hike. Would you like to come over for dinner on blank day or a movie or sail boats in the bath tub. Look this is the wild wild west. Don't wait for him to make a move. You do it... Because that way he knows exactly that you're okay with everything

[slatyb]

Just invite him to dinner.

[MasterKS]

He is old to serve but you can give a try... who knows he is too good.

[chocolatetwopointo]

no you’ll get over it