Guys, Sexy time with my boyfriend?

[bellabee1379]

If my boyfriend is taking his time to describe and tell me what's going to happen before he does "it" with me for my first time, is that him being caring? or no? And is that a green or red flag?

[ohsheeT]

When he's doing this he is feeling the moment as he's saying it he want to know your reaction he's trying to become that moment
.. but I can tell you this. No matter what he tells you it won't end up that way at all

Because that's a new moment a new different day but it should still be good

[Lliam]

It depends on what he is saying and how he is saying it. But it sounds caring. He's telling you what to expect so as to decrease your nerviousness. It might also be a form of erotic foreplay to increase your anticipation and desire.

[Orion84]

Like, describing it how, exactly? In a clinical sense, or more like talking himself up, and bragging about it?

[bellabee1379]

More of so in a clinical sense. And to go a little more in-depth for you, what I mean by that is we have been openly discussing about do the "deed" per say in a better lack of terms, and it will be my first time, not his, and whenever I bring the topic up to him and I tell him that I am nervous about what it's going to feel like, and that I don't know how to do "it" because I am a virgin etc. I ask him things like is it going to be painful what is it going to feel like, is it going to hurt etc. He simply just tells me, "Baby, I will make sure that I tell you what's going to happen before it does and if you're okay with me continuing. And he also says that when we link up (he lives out of state currently) that when we do decide to do "it" that he will make sure that the space we're in is a calming and quite space and that he will try to make sure that I am as comfortable and relaxed as possible.
Only do to the fact that I have a severe anxiety and panic attack disorder.

[Orion84]

Ah, gotcha; I appreciate the extra detail.

I would definitely say that's more of a green flag, because he's trying to soothe your anxiety, and make you more comfortable with the whole process. He wants to minimize the surprises so you'll be more comfortable.

I think that's really nice of him, especially since you'll be able to enjoy yourself more if you're able to relax. Sounds like you found a decent guy! 🙂

[spartan55]

I don't know... I've always subscribed more to underpromise and overdeliver when it comes to sex. Worked well for me.

[Panthero80]

I don't think it is necessarily a green or red flag.

[bellabee1379]

if you don't think that it is a green nor red flag is it him just be caring and compassionate about my feelings and respecting me and my body as a person?

[Panthero80]

Yes, I think so.

[RedInnocent69]

He’s building up your anticipation, confidence, and enthusiasm

[Iron_Man]

Why don’t you get married first

[bellabee1379]

Respectfully, it shouldn't matter whether or not we are married or me waiting till marriage. It's 2025. People have premarital sex all the time. It's completely well within the norm in my generation to have premarital sex. Especially when we both love each other and support each other and do thing for each other and are there for one another in times of need. And not that you need to know this because it's none of your business, but we are going to get married in the near future. He and I are constantly talking about our future together and starting a family when we are both financially stable to bring a baby into this world.

[Iron_Man]

So other people are doing it so that makes it OK for you to do it and you’re not held accountable for yourselves personally? It doesn’t matter what year it is you should wait until you’re married.

[bellabee1379]

If that's the damn case, then ALL MEN who are virgins should wait till marriage as well. But I think that what you are saying only applies to virgin woman. When it should be all across the board.

[Iron_Man]

Both

[Aldan1609]

Caring