If a man wants to pursue a woman, why can't he take the initiative to plan and set the dates?

[Anonymous]

I have been talking to this guy for a while now. We have been on a few dates. We are both single parents, which makes things a little more complicated. He has his child part time, but I have mine full time. He always complains saying all we do is text, and not go on dates.. but he barely asks, and I think its due to him just assuming Ill be busy (I told him CLEARLY I would make time for him if he ever wanted to plan something). Or I think that he assumes that I could be seeing other men constantly (its 2025 and its todays culture.. but I'm not into it).
Its not just me.. a lot of women feel like they're left to do the planning. The guys (not all) just throw out the "what do you want to do?" Or "Why won't you make plans with me?"
I communicated this to him again but never got a response.. he's the kind of man who suppresses his feelings and avoids serious conversations I noticed.

[alli-112]

I think guys in general are not the best at planning for whatever reason, presumably some sort of socio-cultural trend. Just sit down and talk to him about your frustration and figure out some sort of compromise that works for y'all. Maybe he's not good at planning, maybe he's busy, maybe he prefers spontaneity, but it's not compatible with y'alls life styles, etc. Or maybe he wants you to ask him out as well (ex. he might feel like it's one sided on some). Could easily be a miscommunication or just personal incompatibilities.

[Asker]

I communicated this to him thoroughly and like an adult but he ignores me

[Anonymous]

Common sense. There's no point in asking a woman that's just going to say no. And you just as much said so.🤦‍♂️ You're right, it is a problem today. Women and thier entitlement is off the charts. Women broke this and they want men to fix it. Well look at it from a guys point of view he can work hard and get rejected repeatedly. Or he can just choose the woman who really shows she wants him. Sorry the REALITY is most women just don't provide most men with enough incentive anymore.

[SotiCoto]

Why bother saying "a man" and "a woman" when you're talking about someone specific and the woman in question is yourself? You're just phrasing it in a way that is deliberately misleading.

[Asker]

Because many people have been in this situation. I am asking from their experiences.

[BarryLiverstone]

Because he’s not wanting a serious relationship. If he made the effort to plan more dates and opened up emotionally, then wouldn’t you connect to him more and start to rely on him?

[Likes2drive]

Maybe in the past the women he has spoken to never wanna do what he made plans for so he figures you should tell him what you like to do, maybe you should just mention one time or make plans and tell him it says turn to make plans next time

[jahaims]

So why invest in someone that immature?